From what I have experienced, in face to face readings, people are very open with their information. It's the online arena where certain tendencies to withhold even basic information comes into play. I do consider gender to be basic info.
I agree with you on that point. Face to face, none of this even matters because usually it's in a private setting with just the reader and sitter. I think people get antsy online because it's a public forum and they feel hesitant to post personally identifying information for everyone to see.
As for gendered cards coming up, I'm more likely to want to know specifics regarding let's say a certain female, does she seem like a queen of swords type or does he seem like a knight of wands type of guy, and then I'll explain a knight of wands in his typical behavior. Usually as soon as I start describing a certain card, the sitter exclaims right away that they know who is being shown by a particular card.
Makes sense, it's to identify people. I have no qualms with that.
It's really hard to read for anyone who is highly guarded whether online or in real life. My aim in reading is to give my sitter the best most helpful reading I am capable of, and to do so we both need to be open to the whole experience. I read for free and I read for money, I treat both the same and I put my whole heart into it. It's a hard struggle when I try to read for someone who is holding back certain relevant information and their reason why isn't important, it's just on my end I sit there fighting against their walls of protection and or lies, and spend more time on that battle than on getting and giving the reading they want. So the reading lacks and suffers, in my opinion.
I get where you are coming from, and it IS annoying when people hold things back and even flat out lie. But I think I'm more detached when I read & I understand that sometimes people won't feel comfortable sharing things with me, a complete stranger, that they wouldn't even tell their very best friend - like an affair or something unethical. If they lie about it in real life, why wouldn't they lie about it to me? If I notice walls, I let the reading be as it is. Can't win em all. Plus, sometimes the cards will tell me what's going on anyway, and if I feel like it, I will just talk around the subject.
Although I do appreciate people who are honest and open, even about difficult things, b/c like you said it does produce a better and more satisfying reading experience for the both of us.