Pet peeves

Well to be honest a lot of it is just special snowflakeism too. I mean if you are in a female body and you don't actually have a problem with it then whats the big deal in being referred to as 'she'?

crystalrose said:

From what I've observed, it's a social movement. People, especially younger people, are becoming more flexible about sexuality, gender roles, gay, transgender rights etc so what to call people is becoming a hot button issue. It's a generational gap that is now playing out right here on this board.

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But I am not finding that they are more flexible, I am finding that they are more rigid and their labels are becoming ever more micro. Like I fit into to this incredibly tiny niche of people, do not even attempt to define me with something that is close to describing me but misses on one tiny microscopic point or I will label you phobic. That is how the youngsters are behaving these days. There are so many labels now that in the past we would have simply called bisexual, and man if you dare to say that you will get jumped for it.

Padma said:

I am with you there!



Have run across it in a few forums, as well as advice columns etc...so I guess it is just that people are now identifying differently, such as gender-neutral, and there is no set way to deal with it, you know? No previous traditional way. People are looking for new guidelines.

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Ah, okay. Some of the people I run with (in my close circles) are genderqueer or just don't fit neatly into the binary due to orientation or presentation or whatever. I'm sure that I come across to some people as being overly "politically correct" but the truth is that I just have a lot of sympathy and compassion for anyone who's spent their whole life feeling like a square peg. And I want to make sure I use the right words, just like I make sure that I get someone's name right when I meet them for the first time.

As someone who considers herself a spiritual person and who comes from a very ancient Eastern culture, the idea of transcending or combining genders or sexualities is really not that new (especially when we look at my native deities and mythology)...but the language to express these ideas in English is still evolving...

I don't know anyone who jumps down anyone's throat for getting this stuff wrong. If anything, my friends have been super patient and understanding with me for taking some time to get it.

Sorry for the slight derail. I just very strongly believe in treating others with respect. And I'm glad that a lot of people here feel the same way.

prudence said:

But I am not finding that they are more flexible, I am finding that they are more rigid and their labels are becoming ever more micro. Like I fit into to this incredibly tiny niche of people, do not even attempt to define me with something that is close to describing me but misses on one tiny microscopic point or I will label you phobic. That is how the youngsters are behaving these days. There are so many labels now that in the past we would have simply called bisexual, and man if you dare to say that you will get jumped for it.

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Maybe that has more to do with teenagers being teenagers than anything else. I remember being that age and people would go to war over what kind of punk they were LOL. Kids love labels at that age...it's part of adolescence I think.

prudence said:

But I am not finding that they are more flexible, I am finding that they are more rigid and their labels are becoming ever more micro. Like I fit into to this incredibly tiny niche of people, do not even attempt to define me with something that is close to describing me but misses on one tiny microscopic point or I will label you phobic. That is how the youngsters are behaving these days. There are so many labels now that in the past we would have simply called bisexual, and man if you dare to say that you will get jumped for it.

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Yes, our culture is scaling the heights of foolishness and nobody thinks there's anything odd about it. I've almost decided I'll just blow right by all the lesser phobias, go straight to being a "humanophobe" and be done with it.

prudence said:

But I am not finding that they are more flexible, I am finding that they are more rigid and their labels are becoming ever more micro. Like I fit into to this incredibly tiny niche of people, do not even attempt to define me with something that is close to describing me but misses on one tiny microscopic point or I will label you phobic. That is how the youngsters are behaving these days. There are so many labels now that in the past we would have simply called bisexual, and man if you dare to say that you will get jumped for it.

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Prudence I totally agree on the microscopic labels! I am younger too, but not super young (late 20's) and it even annoys me. Why does bisexual now need to be broken down into pansexual/queer/heteroflexible etc etc ?? I've gotten into inane debates about this that made me want to walk away at the absurd logic. And people get very touchy and sensitive when you use the wrong label or flat out don't understand. Some specific orientations do require nuance and sensitivity, but most of the time I think the sexuality thing is getting too political & overly-complicated. Maybe in 50 years when the teenagers grow up & the newness has died down, people will identify themselves with less fanfare but for now, it's extreme.

I identify as pansexual. I've never debated anyone, straight or otherwise about it...lol. I must not hang out with these people y'all are talking about. I'm in my late 20s and my close friends range from from 21-55...

I don't care who "understands" my orientation the same way I don't care who understands why I read cards.

Khatsar, I think we all want to respect others (well, most peeps here, I think!) It is a time of change, and we have to roll with it, and I respect that too - people can be whatever they wish, insofar as I am concerned...just wish the rules, which evolve constantly, would be easier to understand!

@Prudence and Barleywine...zomg. Just laughing. Love the acerbic and perceptive points of view!

khatsar said:

I identify as pansexual. I've never debated anyone, straight or otherwise about it...lol. I must not hang out with these people y'all are talking about. I'm in my late 20s and my close friends range from from 21-55...

I don't care who "understands" my orientation the same way I don't care who understands why I read cards.

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Oh, wow. I am suuuuch a Luddite. I don't even know what pansexual means...! But, I don't mind at all, if that is what you are! You go! Be happy

Oy. This place is more fun when I know less about people's politics.