[Sinduction]

It's also part of a pro reader's responsibility, at least I feel it is mine, to know who needs more help than I can give. If someone came to me and tried to interrogate me, I'd know right away that they are in need of more help than I can give them. That is why I would not read for them.

If it was someone who was simply curious and wanted to discuss these things, then that's a different story. I deal with that all the time. But hammering off questions is not a discussion.

I think one thing you are forgetting is that a lot of us get hassled from people asking the same type of questions. It's all in the approach, why not have a nice conversation instead of interrogating?

There's this thing called tact and respect. Would you go to a hairdresser and ask if their religion had anything to do with how they'd style your hair?

And if she did not wish to discuss her religious beliefs in public and at work, with a stranger interrogating her, then tell her to turn down her ego?

Seriously, I do hope you were kidding.

[Tarotphelia]

Originally Posted by Sinduction

There's this thing called tact and respect. Would you go to a hairdresser and ask if their religion had anything to do with how they'd style your hair?

And if she did not wish to discuss her religious beliefs in public and at work, with a stranger interrogating her, then tell her to turn down her ego?

Seriously, I do hope you were kidding.

No, I'm not . If the hairdresser was giving spiritual hairdos , I might want to know what her religion was before she went to work on mine.

The general public is not always tactful and respectful , and they don't always know when they are being what we might think of as intrusive . And what we think of as intrusive will vary from person to person . As a reader , we are supposed to be (hopefully) the more mature person in the interaction . A position of some spiritual responsibility; the best spiritual responsibility we are capable of .

If we are more spiritually mature , we can put our ego aside for the good of the other person . The ego question is one we need to ask of ourselves and keep a watch on , and keep asking and watching as long as we are reading for others . Reading for others is a responsibility .

[Umbrae]

Originally Posted by Dark Inquisitor

What I am trying to say in blunt and short is -, turn your egos down a few notches and get over yourselves . You're not too high holy to answer a few questions .And if you think you might be ,then maybe you should reconsider your suitability as a reader and think about it some more . Who are you reading tarot for ? Yourself or the querent who comes in need of help ? If the answer is Yourself , then by all means carry on as before and ignore whatever I've said .

I’m in complete agreement with you. As readers, it’s important to stifle ego and open up. Ya gotta be open to the offerings of the Universe in this profession.

That does not however give the sitter license to treat us poorly.

Back in June, I had a sitter come to my table, sit down, and say, “So okay, do what you do that’s so damned impressive…” Crossed his arms, leaned back, crossed his leg, and looked down his nose in my direction.

Me?

What am I supposed to do?

I can play the guys game and read, or I can get huffy, or I can stare back at him.

He interacted with me.

Interactions, each of them, carry their own weight. The hypothetical interaction that began the thread, carried its own weight. Both interactions must be judged on their own weight.

He interacted with me. A bunch of us interacted with the thesis post/poster. Not a big deal. Each interaction carries its own weight and none has less quality of content than others.

As for the sitter – I read for him. He was not happy with the reading, nor was he upset. He got his monies worth, and heard the message.

[Umbrae]

Originally Posted by Sinduction

There's this thing called tact and respect. Would you go to a hairdresser and ask if their religion had anything to do with how they'd style your hair?

And that tact and resect cuts both ways.

Excellent points.

[Grizabella]

OK just suppose your reader answered the questions like this:

How did you come into this profession?

I come from a long line of psychics and card readers.

Why do you read for other people?

Because I sincerely hope to be helping others by doing it and because I need the money.

Do you believe that you can solve other peoples problems via "spell work"?

Yes, I do believe that this can be an effective avenue for certain people.

What type of deck will you use and or will I have the option to choose my own deck?

All I use is my faithful playing card deck with some extra cards I made for myself.

Are you comfortable with the fact that I do read for myself and I am aware of the "book meaning" behind each card?

Are you comfortable with the fact that I don't use book meanings when I read and that I don't use Tarot cards?

How do you think that the tarot works?

I believe quantum physics has a lot to do with it and that the Greater Power of the Universe has a lot to do with how the cards fall.

Do you use reversals?

No, I don't think reversals are necessary.

Do you allow any particular religious beliefs to influence your readings?

I'm Native American and believe in the Creator. I believe my Creator influences everything.

Do you believe that the cards themselves hold any kind of "power"?

No, the power is in me given to me by a Higher Power.

Have you studied psychology (Such as Jung) and do you apply that to your interpretations of the cards?

No. Is that a requirement you think is essential to getting a good Tarot reading? I'm not a license counselor so I'm not qualified to give a reading based on formal psychological training.

Do you believe yourself to be psychic? If so, explain to me how that will come into play during my reading.

Yes, I do believe we're all psychic and I expect that that will come into play in reading the cards for you.

Are you comfortable with my active participation during the reading?

Of course. However, if you're going to read your own cards, then I don't think you need me.

Are you put on the defensive by sitters who have a prior understanding of the tarot?

Not at all.

What type of spread will you be using for my reading if any are used at all and why?

I'll be using the spread/spreads that I feel will best answer the questions you have. I make up my own spreads to suit the occasion.

(Some of these answers may or may not apply to me. First of all, I didn't come from a long line of psychics so far as anyone will admit to. )

[aranarose]

My problem with the questions would be that I'd feel like I had to prove myself, and Tarot, correct, and that we aren't all con artists. And that's a pretty heavy burden to place on someone.

I have no problem explaining my philosophies on reading to someone, in a conversational manner. But to be handed a list of questions? I'd likely point the person to the pagan shop in the local mall where there's a great con artist who does readings for just $15. And offers to remove that curse for $100

As others have said, asking these questions and getting answers is not going to tell you whether or not the person is honest, a good reader, a con artist, etc. No matter how honest or good a reader the person is, they may react badly. Depending on the day, I'd react badly to those questions. Then again, depending on the day, I react badly to "Good morning!"

Reading, for me, is a mindset. And that mindset doesn't usually have room for those sorts of analytical questions. Because, for me, reading is intuitive, not analytical. Odd, considering I'm a hyper-analytical Virgo.... So if someone comes to me with such questions, they might just get a sucky reading, because the mental shift it would take to go from answering those questions to reading is a tough one. Especially if I've been doing readings all day, have to shift the mindset from reading to analytical questions and then back to reading again.

[Tarotphelia]

Consider this :

Some of you might have seen some of the dog training shows on television , wherein a professional trainer visits the family and helps them with whatever is causing the dog to create an uproar . Occasionally the trainer will be challenged by a family member , sometimes a teenager , who will say something along the lines of " I DON'T WANT YOU COMING IN HERE YELLING AT OUR DOG ,.. etc, etc." , in a very accusatory tone .

The trainer will not react in kind . I assume they have seen this many times before , maybe they are inwardly rolling their eyes , but they have experience and are confident in their abilities and their profession . They reply with something like this , " No, that is not what I do . Here is what I do ... " They explain their technique and reassure the questioner , at least enough to let them get on with their job .

They know they are dealing with a dysfunctional situation . They do not throw a big hissy fit , stomp out and refuse to train the dog and the family , cite their decades of experience and why they should never be subjected to such an insulting interrogation . They keep their ego out of it and get on with their job . I assume they've come to expect a certain amount of it , and as long at it's not outrageous they just deal with it in a professional manner .

It's a good example . If we can behave in a professional manner in the face of whatever we might find a bit personally off putting , we can only improve the reputation of tarot readers as a whole . Unfortunately , the damage done by con artists is real and we may be stuck with a certain amount of prejudice to overcome . We don't have to react emotionally when we know it's nothing to do with us and we can choose to maintain a professional demeanor and get on with our job . Or you can get in a huff and throw the person out ,or try to make them feel like an ass for daring to question you , etc. The choice is yours , and reflects on you .

[Sinduction]

Reacting in such a way is quite different than choosing, for whatever reason, to not read for someone.

[Logiatrix]

Originally Posted by Dark Inquisitor

...Unfortunately , the damage done by con artists is real and we may be stuck with a certain amount of prejudice to overcome . We don't have to react emotionally when we know it's nothing to do with us and we can choose to maintain a professional demeanor and get on with our job . Or you can get in a huff and throw the person out ,or try to make them feel like an ass for daring to question you , etc. The choice is yours , and reflects on you .

Personally, I would love the opportunity to change someone's pre-concieved notions about tarot readers. Every once in a while I get a sitter who is coaxed into it by the one who originally came for a reading. I've dealt with a few jokes, sarcastic comments, and surly attitudes. I've dealt with a sitter just like Umbrae described (goodness...maybe it was the same guy!). I know I can't speak for others here, but I'm tempted to believe that none of us would actually be volatile with someone in LoD's frame of mind. Sure, we express here how we'd feel about a laundry-list of questions, but in reality, we'd more likely just care.

Realistically, I imagine that such a client wouldn't get halfway into her interrogation before she would simply tell me of the past negative experience with a "bad" reader. I can't help but sense that she would need a listening ear. Ideally, we would develop a mutual comfort level through further discussion. I'm not somehow special; it's true of any decent reader, as long as there is care and the client feels it. Of course, she could still feel wary and move on, but it it wouldn't be for want of a compassionate reader. Who here would take it personally, as long as we know we did our best?

You make some good points, DI, but there are number of reasons why a reader would refuse a client such as is expressed in the original post. That it is "ego" is awfully narrow and assumptive.

[Tarotphelia]

Originally Posted by Logiatrix

You make some good points, DI, but there are number of reasons why a reader would refuse a client such as is expressed in the original post. That it is "ego" is awfully narrow and assumptive.

That's your point of view and you're entitled to it . Maybe I can put it better this way for some of you if I let the Asian guide step in :

In your honored position as spiritual helper to the seeker who comes to you for whatever reason , meet them where they are . Do not expect them to praise you , to gratify you , to conform to your expectations . Open your heart to this being and feel what they feel in the moment . Honor their fears , their concerns as you would a lost child or a sad friend. Put them at ease in whatever way you can and put aside your concerns for yourself . Open yourself to the higher energies and trust that what you will be given is what they may need to hear in that moment to make a difference or give them a hint of the hope or guidance they need . If the focus is on the self , this cannot be accomplished well . If they reject you , if they do not see your points or your talents , or if they are too much wounded or of the hardened skeptic mind to be able to embrace something different , simply release the reading and any negative feelings it may engender in you . Know that you have done your task in the highest and best way and seek no more than that . All else is simply unnecessary drama.