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Originally Posted by Lareia View Post
Not knowing the gender? May I ask why? I'm curious.
Of course you may When reading online, I often find it quite wordy to refer to a person as a "dash duo"- he/she or him/her. Say you're reading for a loved one: it makes things more practical to know whether X is a man or a woman. Appart from that, nothing really .
Top   #121
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I've enjoyed reading this thread! My own pet peeve is threads in the Your Readings section that ask about getting back with someone. I feel like I don't even have to read the cards to tell them the answer to that question--if you're asking, it's probably not going to happen.

The thing is, it's my pet peeve because I used to do this when I was first learning. I was hung up on a guy for waaaay too long after it was over, and while I didn't do romance readings often, they were always about him. So I hate to see others falling down that rabbit hole, but sometimes the only way to learn what doesn't work is to figure it out for yourself.

Actually, I think that applies to a lot of the pet peeves people mentioned. Clarifiers are a big one, and I don't think that's a product of the Facebook generation. I remember trying to use them when I first tried to read, because the Eden Gray book I had said you could use them when you were confused. And I was confused a lot. Eventually I realized myself that they just didn't work for me, but I wish AT had been around then! It could have saved me some grief.
Top   #122
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Quote:
Originally Posted by plant witch View Post
a pet peeve of mine is people who keep asking the same question, getting clear answers, but never actually doing anything about it, except ask the question again and again and again. then they are surprised/frustrated that nothing has changed or that things have gotten worse!

you wanted advice, you got it, please do something with it
Quote:
Originally Posted by DesertDream View Post
This ^

And when people dont follow the guidelines you've established when asking for a reading.
They ask about the same person and the same question about that person over and over and then are surprised to get conflicting answers (which is bound to happen after you asked about it one hundred times!). This happens all the time in the reading exchange forum.
Top   #123
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ana luisa View Post
Of course you may When reading online, I often find it quite wordy to refer to a person as a "dash duo"- he/she or him/her. Say you're reading for a loved one: it makes things more practical to know whether X is a man or a woman. Appart from that, nothing really .
This brings up one of my pet peeves. Use of the gender-neutral, politically-correct plural pronoun "they" when talking about an individual person - "he" or "she." This usage has no historical provenance and is a grammatical abomination. I'd much rather ask than mangle the language that way. I've been castigated about that here in the past, but it hasn't changed my opinion. Physiological gender (the "bits") is as far as I choose to go in this regard; psychological gender can be all over the map. If someone has surgically changed gender, then that's what I would use. Otherwise, physically speaking, you "are what you are" for purposes of pronoun classification, at least in my book. Sociological niceties don't enter into it.

ETA: Other times I just wimp out and resort to the plural voice: "querents, they . . ." as opposed to "the querent, he/she . . ."
Top   #124
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Any time a querent says "Oh, I think this card means this (not what you said.)" Go read your own cards and leave me out of it then
Top   #125
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Originally Posted by Awakened Queen View Post
Any time a querent says "Oh, I think this card means this (not what you said.)" Go read your own cards and leave me out of it then
Part of my reading method is to actively engage the querent. So, if I say something and a querent says "No, I think it's more like this," I'll ponder a moment or two and then attempt to create a bridge between the two viewpoints, sometimes creating a third, hybrid one. The querent knows the background of the matter much better than I do, and is (or should be) the best judge of what does and doesn't make sense. My job is to bring the reading into the sharpest possible focus for the purpose of arming the querent with useful knowledge, not to impress with my infallibility. (I'm not being critical here - I did see the smiley face at the end of your post!)
Top   #126
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Originally Posted by Kgirl View Post
They ask about the same person and the same question about that person over and over and then are surprised to get conflicting answers (which is bound to happen after you asked about it one hundred times!). This happens all the time in the reading exchange forum.
And then give you a bitchy reading in response to your question in the exchange. I would not trust such people to read for me.

Also, readers with clear emotional issues giving readings. They're in no state man. But like seems to attract like, because people with obvious emotional issues flock to them! Then it's dubious readings all round.

Readers who tell you they're rushing your readings. How would that affect the quality? Readings are not meant to be rushed. But thanks for telling me that so I know to withdraw my question & make a point to never ask you for a reading again.
Top   #127
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kgirl View Post
They ask about the same person and the same question about that person over and over and then are surprised to get conflicting answers (which is bound to happen after you asked about it one hundred times!). This happens all the time in the reading exchange forum.
I may be getting curmudgeonly in my old age, but I've left the forum for long stretches several times because of the predominance of generic "lonely hearts" questions, many by the same people over the same aspect of their lives ("Will we get together/back together?" "Why doesn't he/she answer my e-mail/text?" and - the all-time winner - "What does he/she think/feel about me?"). I won't condemn anyone for sincerely seeking guidance, but at some point I have to just walk away from this babble.
Top   #128
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bridget View Post
I've enjoyed reading this thread! My own pet peeve is threads in the Your Readings section that ask about getting back with someone. I feel like I don't even have to read the cards to tell them the answer to that question--if you're asking, it's probably not going to happen.

The thing is, it's my pet peeve because I used to do this when I was first learning. I was hung up on a guy for waaaay too long after it was over, and while I didn't do romance readings often, they were always about him. So I hate to see others falling down that rabbit hole, but sometimes the only way to learn what doesn't work is to figure it out for yourself.

Actually, I think that applies to a lot of the pet peeves people mentioned. Clarifiers are a big one, and I don't think that's a product of the Facebook generation. I remember trying to use them when I first tried to read, because the Eden Gray book I had said you could use them when you were confused. And I was confused a lot. Eventually I realized myself that they just didn't work for me, but I wish AT had been around then! It could have saved me some grief.
What happens is people treat clarifier cards like separate readings, and it just makes it more confusing. If you are going to ask tarot for a clarifier, all you need is ONE card, not 3.
Top   #129
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bluelagune View Post
Getting a false feedback from a sitter, only later find out through the sitter's row of questions to other readers that the reading was spot on
This has happened to me a couple times and it's highly annoying. Usually it's when you tell the sitter something they don't want to hear. I had one person imply I was a bad reader, my reading was totally off, etc etc & then a week later was asking about the situation that played out exactly as I described.

I don't mind so much the repetitive questions b/c everyone does it. Usually I take a deep breath & try to keep an open mind and remind myself that it's *possible* (though unlikely) there's some hidden aspect to the situation I can't see & just give a proper reading, plus it helps me practice. And I pray that one day the sitter will wake up out of their obsessive/delusional/desperate haze. Who knows? My reading may be the one that tips the scales. But anyway, it's self-selecting b/c those ppl tend to not ask me for readings too often b/c I'm not the one to dress up a crappy situation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by yannie View Post
And then give you a bitchy reading in response to your question in the exchange. I would not trust such people to read for me.

Also, readers with clear emotional issues giving readings. They're in no state man. But like seems to attract like, because people with obvious emotional issues flock to them! Then it's dubious readings all round.

Readers who tell you they're rushing your readings. How would that affect the quality? Readings are not meant to be rushed. But thanks for telling me that so I know to withdraw my question & make a point to never ask you for a reading again.
Yes to the emotional issues, omg!! I shouldn't be able to tell the state of a reader's love life by the readings they are giving. No, every single card does not mean a man is cheating/a player/lying etc. It's like Lovers, he's secretly married... 3 of cups, love triangle.. knight of wands, bad boy player... Queen of Wands, other woman... 6 of cups, cheating on you with an ex... on and on. When 95% of your readings for different sitters fit a specific negative pattern, you need put the cards down, stop projecting your personal issues into readings & go see a therapist!!

I also hate readers who insist that they are right even when I give firm evidence to the contrary. I know better than you what's going on in my life so stfu!

Also, people who need waaay too much info to do a reading. Why do you need my name, birthday, address and ss# to "tune into my energy"?? Personally, I don't like people asking me for too much background before they read either b/c it's my opinion you should be able to see it in the cards... that's what they're there for. I know that's an unpopular opinion.

Another thing - readers who get off on giving predictions with no practical advice. Yes, I see you married to an older dark haired man and you'll have 3 kids and 2 cats. Ok that's nice... can you tell me something useful now?

I don't read with reversals, clarifiers, shadow, quint, dignities.. for me personally, it muddles more than adds. I like to keep things simple and can get quite a lot out of just 3 cards, but I don't mind readers who do more. Whatever works. Although I did go to a lady who read with the entire deck & that was just crazy. And nothing she predicted came true.

Whew that felt good!
Top   #130
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