Ok, so I know that I said this:
But I also sort of want to develop them? I'm very conflicted about this.
This is understandable. Its a scary thought really, as its not part of our normal way of life. But, I have to say, that I've never had anything really bad ever happen to me as a result of my psychic abilities. I am a scaredy-cat basically, but I honestly am comfortable with my psychic and medium skills, which makes those who know me well laugh, because they know that I scare so easily!
What I do recommend highly to everyone is for you to learn how to ground and protect yourself all the time. Even when you are NOT planning to do anything related to using your psychic abilities. Its just good to practice this on a daily and continuous basis, so you're ALWAYS covered! Can bad things happen? Yes, of course, they can. But bad things can happen in anyone life--and DO!
People get in car accidents all the time, but you probably don't even think twice about climbing into your vehicle on a daily basis--even to go get something as trivial as a soda at the corner store! So, don't allow your fears to take over your life, and do practice protection skills, just like you would when you get into your car.
There are many ways to ground and protect yourself. It has become part of my normal morning, day and evening routine now--like brushing my teeth and combing my hair. Every morning, I get out of bed, and stand beside my bed for a few minutes just imagining myself having roots growing out of the souls of my feet and going down beneath the floors of my home and into the ground like the roots of a tree. This is probably the easiest and best way to ground that I know of! Yet another one is also rather easy...eating something for breakfast that is grown in the ground. Such as potatoes or even bread. Eggs would also work--since they come from chickens and chickens eat grass and bugs, etc.
(though i try not to think of the bugs they eat!)
I also start my day off (most days, though I do get into a rut and forget at times) with a morning prayer meditation. Being raised Catholic and because I have such fond memories of the rosary--it is generally praying the rosary and remembering everyone whom I know are in need of prayers.
I feel like both are great protection also for me. But, you don't have to pray like that if you're not into prayers of this kind. Just ask that God/Goddess/the Universe or better yet--YOUR ANCESTORS! watch over you and keep you safe from all harm.
I am one who believe that our ancestors are ALWAYS with us. They watch over us all the time and want to help us but generally can only do so with our permission.
They are also a great way to begin developing your psychic abilities too. Do you have pictures of your loved ones that are now deceased? Even those you may never have known, such as a grandparent who died before you were born? Pictures make it easier, IMHO to make a connection-but again, they are not really necessary. If you know their name or the title (such as Grandma, Nana, Mimi, Grammy...whatever they went by in life--or even their first names), TALK to them. OFTEN!
We happen to have pics of all our ancestors - those we knew and those who were deceased long before we were even thought of--hanging in our living room and various pics scattered through out our homes of them. I even have my husband talking to them at times.
I talk to their pictures all the time. Sharing my ups and downs with them and sometimes just saying "hello". They do come to me a lot. They come to me and offer me information about what is going to happen soon. Happens often enough. But, if you are frightened to actually have them appear to you--just tell them to help you in other ways--perhaps by only sending the thoughts to you as messages. They will do this too-our ancestors do not wish to frighten us. They wish to watch over us and help us.
Meditation I find is really very helpful in this area. But it takes time and practice to get to the point where information will come to you. You need to be patient and you also need to learn to be 'mindful'. By this, I mean to be able to sit still and just 'be'. Don't think about anything. Just clear your mind of all thoughts and sit quietly and 'be'. Its not as easy as you think, especially in today's world. But if you can do this for 3 full minutes and then expand that to 5 and then 10 and so on--building on it--you'll soon see some amazing results! I also feel like this is something you need to be dedicated to and do daily. Even if you only have 3 minutes. Take that 3 minutes and do this.
But, if you are truly apprehensive still of going these routes--then first find some books that speak of others experiences with developing their abilities. There are TONS out there & many in your library that you can borrow. Some of the authors who have many books out there on this type of ability are George Anderson, James Van Praagh, John Edward, Allison Dubois and many, many others. Look for them in Barnes & Noble in the New Age section, generally next to Religious books. Or if you don't have a B&N store near you-other book stores.
I always recommend these 3 AWESOME books to help you develop your abilities. Especially #1 book by Nancy Antenucci and Melanie Howard, because if you belong here to A.T., you are already aware of and interested in reading with cards. This book was written to help you develop your psychic abilities while reading the cards--to get more out of your card readings, but, it will also help you outside of the world of reading tarot or oracle cards too!
1. Psychic Tarot: Using Your Natural Psychic Abilities to Read the Cards by Nancy Antenucci and Melanie Howard. this book is the first one I would recommend you get and work with. Easy to read, easy to understand and very nicely priced.
2. Extraordinary Psychic: Proven Techniques to Master Your Natural Psychic Abilities by Debra Katz. Another fantastic book to help develop your abilities. Again, easy to read, easy to understand and very affordable.
3. You Are Psychic: The Art of Clairvoyant Reading & Healing by Debra Katz.
IMHO, these 3 books are the MUST HAVES in your library if you are interested in developing your psychic abilities. I've used them to fine tune my abilities that I had but had no idea how to control and truly use them correctly. My personal library will always have these 3 books in it.
There are many more--but these 3 are great. And, I believe each of them can be found for less then $15.00 each, brand new! Which these days is also a bargain.
If you have any questions at all, feel free to PM me or post here and I'll try to check back here often. I will mention that I use to be a part of a wonderful psychic-medium online blog that has now disbanded, (sadly,
), and we often used the exercises in all three of these books. That blog went on for years, and we had beginner psychics as well as very well 'seasoned' psychics there and people who were just curious but had no intention of developing - (and often still did!) and people who were interested in developing their abilities and joined to get that guidance. These 3 books are really good for this. Get one of them and see for yourself.