Pathwalker
...going so slowly as usual...
The meditations (there are seven individual ones, if you do it by the book) are quite intense for me, and take some time to assimilate. I won't be writing them all out here, but do recommend you do them for yourself if you're doing this lesson.
The Seven Caers Reading
First impressions - just one major and it’s in the centre so that the reading “see-saws” around it. No court cards! Three cards from the Swords suit, including the Hallow (Ace) and Castle(Ten).
I also notice, after having pulled my cards, that everyone who has so far done this reading for themselves has received a Hallow card in position 1!
1. Your true voice, what you are saying within: SWORD HALLOW
I laughed to see this card here, hasn’t my tongue got me into trouble so many times ! Don’t I apply cool logic to a situation and say what I see? Don’t people hate it - if you can’t be ‘nice’ - can’t dress it up in less than truthful pleasantries - then they don’t want to hear what you’ve got to say - even though it’s truthful or turns out to be correct when the situation has played out. “No-one likes a smart arse”
This is the way I really function, and is why I am now such a loner. Sometimes folks come to you for a while - when they really want the truth and some support because of it - but when their crisis is over they leave again because there aren’t enough social pleasantries.
From booklet: Life energy. Dispelling of illusions. Conquest. Championship. Strength and power. Truth. Justice. Life.
A useful gift I suppose, but one I tend to keep to myself these days. I’m losing the need to be ‘conquest’ and ‘strength’ so I just watch on and say nothing if I can. It’s a gift I’ve found uncomfortable and thankless to live with. I had hoped I might have a new central gift in my crone stage, but apparently not!
(Of course, I could just be deceiving myself that I'm so clever when I'm just a cruel, conceited and and heartless person, but ask those around me "Is she often right?" and you'd get - "Oh bloody hell yes, it's dreadful" so I think I'm just stuck with "knowledge but not wisdom")
2. The joy of your childhood, what you need to regain now: STONE THREE
This card shows a standing stone in the foreground, and a huge chalk figure cut into the hillside in the distance. Before looking at it’s given meanings, I think of my actual childhood - living on chalk Downs (wonderful grey/white fields, how I wish I was there again) visiting places with my Dad, him telling me the local myth of the Cerne Abbas giant, feeling loved and happy and safe.
The book gives me: Construction. Craftsmanship. Professional mastery. Practical skills. Good organisation and skill brings honour, Creative instinct.
There’s two strands to this in my mind. The first is actually creating with my hands. I enjoyed making things and colouring and such like as a child, but experienced very negative responses from my mother which curbed my enthusiasm and confidence. I am now being creative in various ways.
The second strand is the love of nature and myth, and seeing life in everything. I am making efforts to be outside in the countryside more, keeping a nature journal for a year, visiting ancient sites. All these things are bringing me satisfaction and joy.
3. The sum of your life’s insights, what is most true for you: GRAIL FIVE
I know the given meanings for this card can have negative connotations.
For me here it speaks of an emotional loss - a feeling I carry with me very day a desire to be able to “go home” and everything will be complete and alright again. (I should say I see this as a retreat in my childhood, not an alien planet!)
From the book: Disillusion. Disappointment. Vain regret. Broken arrangements or promises.
Reversed: Learning from mistakes. Assessing limitations. Reunions. New friends.
I try to look forward, to make friends, to be happy in the situation I have; regret is vain, the book tells me so.
But my heart aches for something lost long ago.
4. Your destiny, your true direction: XX THE SLEEPING LORD (Judgement)
A huge bird (eagle) flies over the land, just as the buzzards on the hill fly over my favourite tree when I’m sitting beneath it.
In each generation (the myths say) are those who keep alive the story of the guardians asleep with the hills.
From the book:
Regeneration. Renewal. Resurrection. Recapitulation of events or ideas. Prophetic vision. Forgiveness. Adjustment. Recovery.
From the oracle section: “…Mine is the voice of the deep earth, speak and act for me…”
I’ll keep on with the Quest then!
5. Your lost opportunities, regrets which impede your progress: STONE EIGHT
The unfinished carving. ?Not having achieved the best I could have been? Not being in the right area (of expertise) through choices made long ago?
From the book: Prudence. Patient application. Apprenticeship to a craft. Better results through gaining professional skills. Methodical working. Detailed preparation.
If I could apply myself to what I have now, I could still make a better job of it that if I left it unfinished with regrets. Skill is not the same as paper qualifications; it’s the quality of what you know you’ve done that’s important rather than outside appreciation.
6. Your childhood or inner friend, your creative instinct: SWORD TEN (the Sword Castle)
*Not the usual picture or meaning for the 10 of Swords in this pack.
So, my intuitive reading - it’s interesting there’s no human figure in this card, just another bird flying (a hawk this time). The castle is a place that is hard to reach, a place defended by it’s positioning. I met the Hermit here once.
So, a solitary place then, which supports what I saw in the relevant meditation. But it makes me feel better to think that the mainly solitary daily existence I have is helpful to my creativity and to growing as who I am/could be.
From the oracle section: “Whoever crosses the Sword Bridge is compelled by necessity or love…”
Necessity for me then, although I love the place (strange?).
7. The key to initiation, the challenge which faces you next: SWORD NINE
Oh my, the spiked heads on the palisade, the sword in the ditch! In the background a solitary tree (always a symbol that speaks to me) and a waning moon.
So, first thing I remember from previous study of this card is the “how bad can it really be?” kind of thing. It’s fear that stops you going down to get the sword, and the gruesomeness, not actual threat to you.
*So it’s difficulties & fears which challenge me?
From the booklet: Suffering. Fear. Guilt** Grave doubts. Premonitions and nightmares. Cruelty. Despair. Danger. Facing the worst.
**Interesting that I posted a reply here on AT today about feeling guilty at my lifestyle compared to others - who wish they could have what I seem to have.
My meditation on the Caer was all about potential, growth. So I need to overcome whatever fears come about the path, and continue onwards and grow!
Isn't it wonderful when tarot shows you not what you didn't know, but what you didn't really want to acknowledge?
I seem to have written much more than the other folks so far - I hope it somehow blesses someone who reads it later.
Pathwalker
)O(
