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squeakmo9  squeakmo9 is offline
Join Date: 13 Feb 2005
Location: Jupiter, ketu
Posts: 6,288
RWS- 5 of Swords- my emotions as characters

Me as #1- Breathless and astounded at my good fortune, feeling rather mighty in the moment. Something feels too good to be true. Established something, more for myself then for the other two men. Felt I stood up for myself, and there was no other way to do it, or so I initially thought.

Me as #2- Depressed at the turn of events, didn't see any of these emotions (which are racing in) coming. Speechless, and stuck recounting events over and over again.

Me as #3- I feel sad, can't hold in the tears anymore. The release is refreshing, and the tension/fear, gone. Even in the loss I feel relief, and a strange sense of hope just below the surface.

Actual situation fitting to these emotions:

I can say that I have been all three of these men in a conflict/fight with a neighbor. This happened 2 weeks ago.
I had witnessed a neighbor doing something to my property, out of spite. The reason I say "out of spite" is because the moment I caught them in the act, there was more tension, but also embarrasment. Upon sensing their embarassment, it made me feel even more justified, and my anger intensified. Words were exchanged, and for lack of a better word, I "won". I made my point in front of all our neighbors, who were shoveling snow at the time. There were witnesses.
When I was in the moment, I felt rage and hate for what was being done, and for who was doing it. After it was over, I felt shocked at some of the things that came out of my mouth...what I said and how I said it. I thought myself a better person then to do and say what I had done. Felt embarrassed and ashamed of myself. Wanted answers as to why I reacted as I did. Then I began to shake, I started to cry(in private). I felt wronged and wrong, I was worn out in every way. The incident was quick, just a handful of minutes, but it left me thinking long after it was over.
Top   #21
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rachelcat  rachelcat is offline
XII. The Hanging Cat
Join Date: 30 Oct 2004
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 3,403
21 Ways Step 3--LS Manga 4 Wands

LS Manga 4 Wands

Step 3:1 Emotions

3:1.1 The environment's light and cheerful. The sky is pink and full of flower petals. It's a time of togetherness: There are at least 4 to 7 other people there besides the central person. She feels happy, confident, attractive, bold, and the center of attention. She is confident in that both she knows she's attractive and that she knows the steps she's performing. She feels accomplished. The other people fee approval toward her. She's doing a good job. They're proud of her and their traditional celebration. The main emotion is celebration!

3:1.2 Main figure: My surroundings are colorful and cheerful. I'm proud and confident as I do my part in the dance. I feel the audience liking and enjoying my performance. All the excitement leading up to this day shines in my glance. I feel beautiful!

Audience: Wow! She's so beautiful and accomplished! I'm glad I am here to participate in this celebration. We made a good choice for her for this dance. Whoopee! What a party! As I throw my petals, maybe they are little pieces of my heart. It's fun to fall in love just for a day!

3:1.3 I don't know of any specific experiences that equate to these feelings. In general, I like to feel confident and be the center of attention. I used to sing in choirs and I felt so proud and happy when I did well. Recently, I have only been the center of attention in some discussion classes. I sometimes talk too much is discussions instead of letting others have their say. I don't have to say EVERYTHING I know all the time!

I'm looking forward to spring. This card reminds me of the Cherry Blossom Festival here in DC, where they have Japanese themed singing and dancing and all kinds of festivities outdoors. When the cherry trees bloom, of course. I have a great appreciation for music and dance. Sometimes it literally takes my breath away.
Top   #22
MissLainie  MissLainie is offline
Join Date: 10 Jul 2006
Location: Kansas, United States of America
Posts: 9
Step Two: Golden Tarot, Ace of Coins

3.1- The surroundings seem peaceful. The rock walls and ledges, the bushes and the lillies, they speak of happiness, and the peacock and the lion so close together are at peace. The angel, though, holding his large coin seems at the same time content and also careful, mindful. So many things could go right or wrong with this large sum... Or with the surroundings.
The emotions I am taking from this card are those of peace, contentment, and betterment, but also caution.

3.2- Here in my favorite place, with my money. I'm thankful for it, and for my progress, and I love this place... And at the same time, so much could go wrong here. If I drop this coin, will it roll into the lion's den?

3.3- This card's emotion speaks of the present in my life. This summer, I turn twenty one. I'm working full time and back in college. I also have ADHD, which means that my progress in life has been slow and very much work, which has a tendency to come and go. My father is in treatment for the PTSD and subsequent drug and alcohol abuse he's lived with all his life, and his progress is amazing and at the same time easily enough lost, much like the coin this angel is holding.
And the lighter aspect, for now, is that this setting reminds me very much of a place I go during the summer, the only place in nature where I feel like the earth speaks to me, and I to her.
Top   #23
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dadsnook2000  dadsnook2000 is offline
Join Date: 30 Apr 2003
Location: Massachusetts, USA
Posts: 3,474
For MissLainie

Thank you for sharing. I can see why this deck and card are important to you, and you have expressed it with clarity. I am constantly amazed at how these cards and various decks can touch each of us so deeply and effectively, becoming teachers and mandalas for us to cherish and think about. Dave
Top   #24
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whipsilk  whipsilk is offline
Join Date: 13 Mar 2006
Location: Delaware, USA
Posts: 477

Knight of Coins - Tarot of Prague

3.1 The overall mood of the card is quiet, peaceful, but with the potential for activity and -- especially -- noise. The courtyard can become an echo chamber for the bells in the two spires, and the resulting clangor could become almost an assault. The knight, while quiescent, is ready to ride, his wolfhound scampering beside the charger's thundering feet. But now the knight is enjoying the quiet courtyard, and a respite from battle.

3.2 Although the day is overcast, a tremendous sense of calm envelopes me. It's been a long, weary ride to deliver this golden disk, but for now I can enjoy the peaceful surroundings and the ancient stonework on the chapel. Time enough to return to the war-torn front.

3.3 About half of my back yard is old forest, mature trees and heavy undergrowth on a steep slope. Until recently it was impassable with great, arching wild roses, and I had never been into the actual woods. A few weeks ago, a team of landscape workers came out, removed all the wild roses, and cut a path, which they covered with mulch, through the trees and down the slope on the opposite side. After they left, I made my first foray into that area. Looking down on my toy-sized house, through heavy branches of holly, maple, and evergreens, I felt a tremendous sense of peace and calm, surrounded by barely-tamed nature although I was in the midst of suburban Wilmington. It was a different world, and a far more peaceful one than the scurry of my office or the workaday interior of my home.
Top   #25

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Japann  Japann is offline
Join Date: 31 Mar 2007
Location: Hampshire, United Kingdom
Posts: 55
21 Ways - Step 3

Eight of Penacles.

1) A man is concentrating on the task in hand. I feel that he is aware of the mouse watching him and he is not comfortable.

2) I am sat at my desk working. I am concentrating hard but the hour is late and I have a task to finish. I am working by candle light and anxious to get finished. My working conditions are not great but I am doing the best that I can under the circumstances.

3) In my previous job I felt under a lot of pressure and worked very long hours even though I was not paid very well and the extra hours ended up being expected not appreciated.

I hope that I have done okay on this step as I don't feel that I have done it justice.
Top   #26
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whipsilk  whipsilk is offline
Join Date: 13 Mar 2006
Location: Delaware, USA
Posts: 477

Originally Posted by Japann
I hope that I have done okay on this step as I don't feel that I have done it justice.
As the next-to-last to join this group, let me welcome you, Japann. One thing I've learned from this "marathon" (as Dadsnook put it) is not to get down on myself, to accept what I've done and be content with it (I too had an activity I was dissatisfied with). This is really a rewarding and enlightening set of activities; you don't have to please anyone but yourself. Not each one of the steps will be as easy or meaningful (or gratifying) as the others. So relax, enjoy the road ahead, and don't feel you have to maintain any standard but your own.
Top   #27
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dadsnook2000  dadsnook2000 is offline
Join Date: 30 Apr 2003
Location: Massachusetts, USA
Posts: 3,474
Yes, for sure

Yes, whatever you do, don't feel you are doing something wrong. Mary Greer gives us good advice and specific cautions in her book, and I'm sure she has a great deal of experience in teaching others about these things so that they can take best advantage of her study materials, but you can only do what you can do. We all learn from each other in this special study group. By the time we review what others have written and we get through the first 21 steps, we will be much more capable of doing the "adept" section next.

I can say that it is better sometimes to take extra time in writing a response. I often write out my material in a word processor, so I don't feel pressured to send what I write as soon as I'm done. That way I can change anything or get back to reviewing what I wrote a couple of hours later. All of our "late joiners" should be an inspiration to the great number of those who follow this thread to also consider joining. We get so much from this communal experience. Dave
Top   #28
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tarot4fun  tarot4fun is offline
Join Date: 25 Mar 2007
Location: ~
Posts: 4,958
21 Ways - Step Three

Golden Tarot - Eight of Swords

There is a feeling of desolation and abandonment. There is a chill in the air. Her seemingly unawareness of the nearby cliff makes me nervous. Yet she does not appear distraught or frightened. She might be waiting for someone, or else is hatching a plan of her own.

I can't see a thing, but I can feel these ropes and I think I can wriggle them off. I'm not sure where I am ... is there anyone else around here? ... maybe someone will come along soon. It is so quite, only the rushing water nearby; I'm cold and hungry and I want to go home.
Top   #29
Sheri  Sheri is offline
Join Date: 22 Jan 2006
Posts: 5,270
21 Ways - Step Three

Step Three - International Icon Tarot, 5 of Wands

There is a feeling of competition and ego here. Not only does no one want to lose the argument, but each also wants the others to see "the correct" point. There is frustration, just the hints of anger. There is also some slight resentment now as yet another has shown up and entered the discussion with yet another viewpoint.

Yet again, I am coming upon something after it has already started. I feel compelled to add my own viewpoint to the discussion - whether anyone wants it or not. I have felt like the "new kid" in the class so many times throughout my life, that what others think about me doesn't concern me anymore. I don't feel confident, but that is not stopping me either. I must put myself out there - right or wrong - or I will be haunted that I did not. I long to be part of something...

There are more cases than I can count where I have been in this type of situation! But I'll only pick one to talk about . When I took the position that I have been in for the last 6.5 years, I was brought out by a group that has always been "locked" in a controversy with the group I was going to work for. I am sure, that the group that brought me out thought I would be on "their side" because I was coming from a corporate environment on the outside - and they mostly followed that line. However, when I arrived, they discovered I had a mind of my own and tended to be more aligned with the group I was going to work for. It has been a controversial situation ever since and yes, some strong emotions are expressed every so often.
Top   #30
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