Have you ever regretted trading or giving away a deck?

How many people outthere have ever regretted trading a deck or giving a deck away? Personally I regret having gifted my ex-boyfriend with my first Thoth-deck, I loved that particular copy and it worked so well with me, but I also wanted to give my ex a deck that he could learn and benefit from so I gave him my deck and book, several years ago, when we were still together... And then, many years later he dumped me and treated me very bad and now I feel like I don´t even want to ask to get the deck back, if he even still has it, because that deck was such a symbol for the honesty and openness in my heart towards him, and since it now has been so many years with him in his possession, it has probably sucked up all his energy, and I don´t want to have anything of his in my possession.

But I still lament the fact that I gave up that copy. I have since repurchased another copy but it doesn´t work as well for me. I would like to hear from other people that have given up decks and regretted it afterwards. Perhaps it is better to not focus so much on the past, cling to items of the past, and instead let tarot decks come and go. Perhaps the magic was not in that particular tarot deck, but in me at the time, perhaps I had outgrown it anyway. Any input greatly appreciated!

I gave a duplicate deck I had of my Haindl to someone at work whom I know was very interested in Tarot and wanted to learn (along with a book on the deck). Same thing they ended up not being especially nice to me afterwards. I had a split second where I regretted it, but then my faith came back. I have a lot of faith in the universe and life. I figured if I was drawn to give it to him, the universe wanted him to have it. For whatever reasons he was meant to have it in the grand scheme of things, if the universe meant for him to have that deck, then that's good enough for me.

And yes, I would agree with that, the magic is always in us. The cards are just a tool to focus that magic but it is inside of us. Of course when you pick up the deck and negative memories and resentments come to mind, it dampens the magic somewhat. But it's not the deck, imho, opinion, it's your feelings and attitudes about it right now. Once you drop the resentment the deck should work perfectly again,

Bar

Galatea said:

[....]that deck was such a symbol for the honesty and openness in my heart towards him, and since it now has been so many years with him in his possession, it has probably sucked up all his energy, and I don´t want to have anything of his in my possession.

But I still lament the fact that I gave up that copy. I have since repurchased another copy but it doesn´t work as well for me.

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Lately I have been dwelling on the fact that I still miss the jewerly that my ex stole from me. It was 5 years ago and there are times here and there where I'll start thinking about it. I think that since a lot of pieces were given to me as X-mas gifts so that's why I start thinking about them during this time of year.

I had a small collection but it had some really nice pieces (pearls, diamonds, blue sapphire bracelet, ruby ring, gold necklaces, etc) and and he took all of it except for one necklace and one pair of earrings since I was them wearing at the time.

The other day I mentioned it to my sister and she told me, "Oh, you wouldn't want that stuff anyway. It probably was totally filled with negative energy. You wouldn't want to even touch that stuff. It would just be a reminder of a time you were miserable and living with that jerk anyway."

And when I thought about it, there was a lot of truth to what she said. I don't want any reminders of him. And maybe if I had those things I wouldn't wear or truly appreciate the crystal necklace that my hubby bought me last X-mas. No, I don't have the money now to replace any of the jewerly I had, but now my life is wonderful. I have a home, a beautiful family, and a Tarot collection.

Galatea said:

Perhaps it is better to not focus so much on the past, cling to items of the past, and instead let tarot decks come and go. Perhaps the magic was not in that particular tarot deck, but in me at the time, perhaps I had outgrown it anyway.

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You aren't the same person you were then. You have changed and evolved and yes, maybe the deck just doesn't work for you now because of it. Plus, it is very possible that this deck doesn't work for you now because your memory of it is linked to him and the pain associated with him. This might change with time, then again it might not. Meanwhile, I think you should have some fun purchasing some other decks. These decks will have new, positive associations for you and who knows, you might find a deck you really connect with it, one you wouldn't have found if you had your old one.

Oh yes! Several times! The latest was my Ancestral Path. I traded it to someone, figuring I could just get another one, but not realising it had gone out of print. I had had the good fortune of getting a copy that was easy to shuffle, as my first one was very stiff. When I traded it away and then finally found one for $10 that included postage on eBay, what I ended up with another very stiff copy that's hard for me to shuffle. Consequently, I find I don't use it very much.

There are many other instances where I either gave away or traded away a deck when I first started learning tarot and had more to spend on cards that I now wish I hadn't. Because as I've moved on and learned more, decks that baffled me then would be much easier to read with now and I wouldn't mind having them again.

Oh yes. I traded away two in my recent purging that I just had to go out and get again because I found how much I missed them!

Lyric and QueenofPentacles, it is good to know that I am in good company over here in the regretful corner... But I have to say that I really like your take on this, SunChariot, to trust the universe and trust the process. That is a really comforting thought. I really liked how you pointed out that once I lose the resentment about my ex that particular deck might come alive for me again. I really appreciate you saying that, I think it holds very true.

And Glass Owl, thank you for that beautiful story about the jewelery, it gave me a lot to think about. I think you and your sister are right, that deck is now contaminated by his energy. Perhaps that is why the images don´t work for me right now, like SunChariot also pointed out. I need to free myself.

But it is also true that giving him that deck has led me to discover new decks, that I perhaps wouldn´t have taken the time to study if I had still focused on that one. And it is true I am not the same person. And very true that if you look at this in a positive light, then the giving up of this deck will lead me to new decks and new learning experiences that will provide more positive associations for me.

After I got "into" Tarot I started reading with the "Tarot of the Moon Garden" and in truth I really hated it a lot! The Wands were repetitious, etc. I did sell it to a student in one of my classes years ago.

Now that I teach classes and bring decks in with me to illustrate different things, I wish I still had the deck in my collection ~ but I'd never go out and buy another copy!

I surprisingly (since I liked it) never connected that well with the Buckland Romani. So I traded it. I think that the recipient didn't either.

I sometimes think about it because it would be nice to give it another go, but with the prices it fetches now, I don't see that happening too soon. I think that is the only one that I do regret getting rid of. Not because of it's value. But because I can't just get my hands on another copy of I wanted one Also, it was a kind gift from someone here. Of course it was much appreciated, but like her, I realised that it was of little use sitting in my cupboard doing nothing, which is why I got rid of it.

LB

Not a deck. I do regret giving away a ring to a very VERY dear friend - the same one to whom I also regret giving some first editions of books we both loved; she was/is very into first editions and bought me new replacements. But it isn't the same. Then again, I have to remember that she still gets that extra first edition frisson from them.... and I do love her to bits ! (The ring was a bad mistake - but she is leaving it to one of my daughters in her will, I believe.)

It is a tough world out there. When you give a very special gift to someone you really care about you want it to be something that means something to you and therefore to them. But if it means enough to you, you still stand to regret it, however much you love the recipient.

I don't trade decks on unless I'm really sure I don't want them and I haven't regretted one trade and once the deck is gone I don't think of it again - I might be reminded when I see particular decks being used on here by someone or they say how much they love it, but I'd never get another copy of a deck that I'd previously traded.

I keep decks in my collection that maybe I should trade on but if i'm not sure, then I keep them.