How often has this happened to you?

Okay I have been going through this huge ordeal with one of my exes. I thought and still believe is the love of my life. Granted I use tarot a LOT to try and figure out what is going on.

Anyway, the cards that I pulled and the that others have read for me as well, mostly have been cards saying that I should move on. No! I didn't but I did pull back as to appear that I'm not interested anymore.

So, now this morning I asked how does M feel about me, I pulled all these nice cards ( i will post in your readings later today just to make sure I'm not getting too happy).

Not only that because I thought the cards were playing with me. I asked another question similar to it (What does M think about getting back together again), pulled great cards as well.

I know that the future is not set in stone but to drastically change from a year of off and on hostility to complete happiness is scary.

So, I was wondering if this has happenend to anyone else?

Thanks in advance.
aquanesha

If you keep on reading on the same thing over and over again then the cards will eventually either become so confusing that you won't know what they are saying or they will tell you what you want to hear.

I remember some of the readings you've done on this and agree that the message has always been Move on or leave it alone, it's in the past.

What's the point in doing a tarot reading about something if you're not going to take any notice of a persistent message that has been the same message for months, yet now when you say the cards have changed their tune and are telling you a different message you're suddenly going to take notice of them?

Sorry if this sounds harsh but my advice would be to stop reading and obsessing about a relationship that is in the past and move on.... You can bet your bottom dollar that's what he will have done.

I have to say I agree with Sulis. This is one reason I rarely read for myself... If I ask then it means I should follow the advice right?
Maybe you should do A reading... ONE reading... on "what will help you to move on", "what steps can you take to move on", "what were you supposed to learn/did you learn from this relationship".
Maybe those would be more constructive questions.
You obviously still have personal issues to deal with about not being with this person any longer or moving on wouldn't be so hard. Something keeps you clinging... Maybe a karmic tie... do a reading on that and what is the next step. You are creating more karma by not learning the lesson in my opinion.
I really feel if you aren't going to follow the advice, don't ask. Secondly ask again only after there have been changes made by you or circumstances have really changed.
Hope this helps in some way...
SJ

I'm afraid I have to agree with Sulis. I don't know why the cards suddenly became (apparently) favorable. But I do know that if you've been getting the same message over and over and haven't been listening to it, then this reading should come with a grain of salt. Maybe the tarot was being like a frustrated friend who finally says "Fine, I'll tell you what you want to hear: he likes you, you can be with him" and goes off muttering "'course, that's a stupid thing to do but I can't make you do the right thing." Or somesuch.

In the end it's your choice to make, not the deck's. But I would advise thinking about this reading and the previous ones carefully before you act.

Hi!

This happened to me a lot recently. I was in love with my ex (well, I'm still in love with him) but my readings weren't very nice, and I refused to acknowledge them because I really wanted him back. I ended up doing so many readings on the same subject that all of the sudden my cards started telling me what I wanted to hear, (everything is going to be ok, he will go back to you) and I nearly crashed into a wall. I stoped reading for myself on that subject and even though I still love him I understand that it's time to move on and forget about him. I also learned that reading tarot this way is useless, no good can come from ingnoring real advice and focusing on what you want to believe anyway.

I hope you can find a lesson in this and see what's best for you.

blessings
lain

Sulis said:

I remember some of the readings you've done on this and agree that the message has always been Move on or leave it alone, it's in the past.

Click to expand...

Thank you Sulis, but I believe the one that I read on over and over with and actually posted for opinions was with A not M.

But also I hear that a reading could be wrong because of the reader so who's to say that I, myself, and the others that have read for me on this situation are not just reading it wrong. And that now, it is actually being read right.

I found this quote in another post but I think that I will keep it in mind here .

Thanks again.

Relationship matters do go in cycles. For instance, abusive relationships.

First, there's the honeymoon phase. All is just sweetness and honey and couldn't be better. Dreams are dreamed, plans are made, the love is so intense and good that it's totally apparent that these are soulmates.

Then the problems start---the bickering, the tension, the stress. She knows something is about to happen so she gets tired of the stress and does something to just "make" it happen and get it over with.

Then the big blow-up hits. Things just all go to hell, someone gets hurt (physically or psychologically) ----big huge crisis.

Woman says "Okay, it's over, I'm not doing this anymore" and she moves out or goes to a women's shelter.

Then the abusing party is suddenly sorry. It won't ever happen again. I don't know what came over me. You did contribute to it, though, and she knows she did do something. Yadda, yadda.

Woman thinks "awwwww, he's sorry. Never going to happen again. This is the love of my life, my soulmate." and she moves back in.

Honeymoon period---things are soooo beautiful, sexy, perfect in every way. Dreams are dreamed, plans are made, she agrees she had a large part in what happened, they're "making it work"---"working it out"----insert whatever term you want here.

Then the tension starts to mount again, stress sets in-----you get the picture.

Crisis hits, someone gets hurt-----same old same old.

It's said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results.

I like the saying, "If I think what I've always thought, I'm going to get what I always got."

So what the cards may be telling you is that you've moved into that "awwww, it wasn't that bad, I did contribute to it, this is really my soulmate, we can work it out phase" that will take you right back into the same cycle all over again.

It's not an abusive relationship, you say? Well, maybe not, but maybe it's an addictive relationship. Those are just as destructive, and the cycle is the same.

It's something to think about. ((((( aquanesha ))))

Thanks Lyric.

And no we didn't have an abusive relationship.

I liken it to the one that Noah and Allie had in the notebook. If you saw it, remember how they split because her parents didn't think that he was good enough for her.

So, they went years without speaking to each other. Except for I have to speak to M sometimes because her sisters and I have a bond that wasn't going to break just because M and I aren't together.

So, I guess that's why I hold out hope that one day M will realize that my parents and friends and her parents and friends shouldn't be the deciding factor on why we aren't together.

But thank you all for your input and that's for sure the last time that I post in this forum about my situation with M or A or anyone else for that matter. I think I will just keep it to myself and just read for others.

aquanesha

aquanesha,

The problem I have with reading Tarot in relationships to decide to go back/or stay is that often, the cards are very short term. People change, attitudes change. And in a relationship, no matter what we say, there are more then two people involved. You marry the one you love, not their family, but you still have to deal with the family. So family stress does effect a relationship, work stress does effect a relationship etc. etc. If you get the most dreadful cards, but you are confident that you can weather the storm... why leave? If you are thinking of leaving, but suddenly you get promised roses... who is to say that won't change in a week or two?

The deciding factor in if you want to go back, should be what your intuition deep down is telling you and if your ex is also willing to give it a try. Obviously, you still care very much for him, if you feel it's enough to make things work, why don't you ask him for a chance?

However, seeing as you are doing Readings on not 1 Ex, but 2, you should seriously think on very uncomfortable questions. Like: "Why do I want to go back to any of them in the first place?", "Am I looking for a relationship with who they are now, or am I looking to the past?", "Am I looking for a relationship that's healthy for me, or just for a relationship" etc. etc. I know those questions are hard, and I wish you the best with everything.

Kahlie

to go back to your original post/question

aquanesha said:

Okay I have been going through this huge ordeal with one of my exes. I thought and still believe is the love of my life. Granted I use tarot a LOT to try and figure out what is going on.

Anyway, the cards that I pulled and the that others have read for me as well, mostly have been cards saying that I should move on. No! I didn't but I did pull back as to appear that I'm not interested anymore.

So, now this morning I asked how does M feel about me, I pulled all these nice cards ( i will post in your readings later today just to make sure I'm not getting too happy).

Not only that because I thought the cards were playing with me. I asked another question similar to it (What does M think about getting back together again), pulled great cards as well.

Click to expand...

i have to echo the reply made by Sulis

Sulis said:

If you keep on reading on the same thing over and over again then the cards will eventually either become so confusing that you won't know what they are saying or they will tell you what you want to hear.

What's the point in doing a tarot reading about something if you're not going to take any notice of a persistent message that has been the same message for months, yet now when you say the cards have changed their tune and are telling you a different message you're suddenly going to take notice of them?

Click to expand...

not being rude or harsh, but why ask personal questions which have alot of emotional attachment to them if you are not prepared to listen and accept the advice and insights given.
only i was done this road once (and thank goodness only once, as i learnt the lesson available to me) at the beginning of this journey, and i read a situation multiple times, re-phrasing the question, and i kept getting what i didn't want to hear, and i would try to forget that reading. then readings started revealing what i wanted to hear. after the situation passed (and not in my favour, nor the way i wished it would evolve) i looked back on the readings, and lo and behold, the first readings were spot on.
perhaps, before you do a reading for yourself, decide whether you are ready to hear and listen and ACKNOWLEDGE the readings, especially if it comes up with what you don't want to hear. or only do ONE reading on the situation. and don't do another (nor get anyone else to do another based on that situation) until a major change has occured within that situation, or your attachment to the situation has lessened.
i hope you can look back in time, and see the real insights.
blessings
KS