Self-readings: Intuition or Wishful Thinking?

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 02 May 2004, and now archived in the Forum Library.

lunakasha	02 May 2004
[font=centaur] OK....here is my question: When doing readings for yourself....how can you be sure that the information you are receiving is really objective and accurate? I have no problem with objectivity when reading for someone else, but...it gets tricky when I am reading for myself. :eek: I try my best not to interpret things the way I want to see them, but.....I do question whether or not I am truly listening to my intuition or whether I am subconsciously allowing myself to see what I want to see rather than what is really there.... Does anyone else have this problem....and if so, how do you learn to keep your feelings and desires from influencing your readings??? Thanks! :) Luna [/font]

mj07	02 May 2004
I've wondered about this myself. However, I don't believe I actually can control what cards fall where, in which case, the only way I can interpret things the way I WANT to is if I ignore an obvious meaning for a card, y'know?

lunakasha	02 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by mj07 I've wondered about this myself. However, I don't believe I actually can control what cards fall where, in which case, the only way I can interpret things the way I WANT to is if I ignore an obvious meaning for a card, y'know? Well......I think it depends on the cards, mj.....some of the meanings are very clear-cut but I think most of the cards and positions are subject to interpretation, to some degree....at least that has been my experience.... Let me think of a good example and I will post it here..... :) Luna

mariskiss	02 May 2004
I've heard that it's always a good idea to have someone else do readings for you, although I do often do readings for myself to practice and I have noticed that it is a problem seeing what you want to see... especially it's a bad final outcome. I find myself trying to justify it being positive! Also another thing that you shouldn't do is ask the same question over and over again with the same deck, a funny thing that happens to me when I do this is that the Devil card pops up in the reading, and I take that as a "stop being so obsessed and asking the same question over and over again!!!" Has anyone else had this happen to them before?

EminemsAngelBaby	02 May 2004
I think checking in with your intution via other tools.....meditation, feelings, synchronicity, in conjunction with self readings can be really helpful.

lunakasha	02 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by EminemsAngelBaby I think checking in with your intution via other tools.....meditation, feelings, synchronicity, in conjunction with self readings can be really helpful. I agree.....and I do try to meditate on the problem and figure out *what* I can do to improve the situation, but....again, when it comes to trusting your intuition...whether with cards or without...how do you know that you are really hearing your "inner voice" and not just what you want to hear??? :eek: mariskiss mentioned that she finds herself trying to justify a negative outcome....I do the same thing!!!! And even though part of me knows I am doing this, another part of me tries to JUSTIFY my actions...that I am not REALLY adjusting the outcome!!! :D Did that make any sense???? :eek:LOL!!! Anyway.... I guess what I am trying to figure out for myself is: how can I distinguish between my true inner voice, my own intuitive guidance.....and "wishful thinking???" I am not sure there is an answer to my question....it is probably something I need to practice and figure out for myself. But I would greatly appreciate any advice you may have for me.... :D Luna

Ruby7	02 May 2004
I find that most of the readings that I do for myself are too accurate, as in, every card I pick always seems to be a card that makes absolute sense in whatever reading I am doing, about whatever situaiton. Most of my self-readings also tend to be very positive in terms of the outcome. I was amazed by this when I was first doing self-readings, but now I feel that a bit of wishful thinking may be at play. I mostly use self-readings to explore personal issues now, to open my mind a little, see into my subconsious, get to know myself a bit better etc. I find that quite often blinders are removed and I see a truth that was right in front of me, but previously unseen. But yes, Luna, I do feel wishful thinking is a part of self-readings for me, Ruby7

EminemsAngelBaby	02 May 2004
Lunakasha, Excellent questions. I totally understand where you're coming from. I'm reading a book right now that deals with your questions in depth. It's called Living In The Light by Shakti Gawain and I highly recommend it for getting in touch with your true inner voice and allowing it to manifest in your outer reality. A couple of signs that you've truly tuned into yourself are an increased feelings of energy, aliveness, and empowerment after following your gut feelings and a sense of things just falling into place. Life flows, rather than being a struggle, and things you want in your life begin to appear in and of their own accord and timing. Essentially you stop trying to "control" your life, follow your feelings, and allow the universe to step in and coordinate things for you. Simply put you act in conjunction with the universe. I hope this helps. Check out the book. It's really helping me to connect with myself and follow that guidance. It's coming together in the outer world for me and to see the process interweaving is very exciting!

lunakasha	02 May 2004
Thanks, EminemsAngelBaby!!! I will definitely check it out....it is funny because I recently discovered another of Shakti Gawain's books, Meditations, and it is VERY good....includes many different guided meditations, with lots of detail! I really like her writing style, so I am sure this book would be a good read....thanks again! :D Luna

EminemsAngelBaby	02 May 2004
Lunakasha, No problem, happy to help:). Sounds like this is something the universe(and your own intuition)have in store for you.....it flows. Enjoy!!

unbearablelight	02 May 2004
At the very least, it seems like self readings are a tool for honestly communicating with oneself (at least for me it is :) .) I am prone to doing things that I know in my heart of hearts are not the right thing to do. If I do a reading on the subject for "advice" and approch the cards intuitively it gives my inner convictions voice rather than the wishful thinking or denial that, otherwise, I might act on.

lunakasha	02 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by unbearablelight At the very least, it seems like self readings are a tool for honestly communicating with oneself (at least for me it is :) .) I am prone to doing things that I know in my heart of hearts are not the right thing to do. If I do a reading on the subject for "advice" and approch the cards intuitively it gives my inner convictions voice rather than the wishful thinking or denial that, otherwise, I might act on. This makes sense to me.... I do feel that I am able to rely on my intuition most of the time...and using the cards does help me focus on specific issues objectively--it allows me to limit my options, if that makes sense, based upon the cards that come up in the reading. The problem comes when I see a card that doesn't make sense to me, or that does not jive with what I was expecting, or hoping to see.... I think this is just one of those situations where I need more practice, practice, practice.....and there will hopefully come a time when I can feel more confident in trusting my intuition, regardless of whether it is telling me what I want to hear or not.... :) Luna

lunakasha	04 May 2004
OK....I have decided that maybe it would be helpful if I could illustrate my point with a true-life example, so here goes... Let's say that I have a question about a relationship: Q: Will Beth and I resolve our differences and become reconnected??? I perform a simple, 3-card spread, to be read as a sentence: Current issue***Options/What I Can Do***Outcome Queen of Wands***7 of Wands***4 of Pentacles OK....first of all, I need to mention that I choose not to use reversals in my readings...I look at both upright and reversed meanings and rely on my intuition in applying the appropriate meanings. This is but one example of how my readings are very much subject to interpretation....but as I said in my original post, I do trust my intuition most of the time... Secondly--we have a court card in this reading, which most of us will agree can be very tricky to interpret....on a personal note, I have a HELL of a time with courts ;).....I just ordered both books on understanding courts, which I hope will be helpful.... Meanwhile, HOW do I interpret the Q of Wands in position 1??? Does she represent me, or my friend Beth??? OR does she represent characteristics of either myself or the issue at hand???? Not an easy thing to figure out, but here is my best guess: Current Issue: Queen of Wands: In reading the description of this card as representing an actual person, it does sound like it fits my friend: enthusiastic, creative, witty, confident, passionate, bold. Maybe this means that it is her issue, or that the outcome lies in her hands??? It could mean that she is going to make the first move toward a reconciliation.... On the other hand, if I read this card as an event or attitude, rather than an actual person, then the advice would be that I should take charge of the situation, be assertive, let my feelings be known.... Here is a perfect example of what I am struggling with: If I interpret it one way, I am leaving the situation in her hands.... BUT if I interpret it the other way, it is up to me to take control, to make the first move....so which is the best answer???? Now, if I am being completely objective, I would have to go with my first instinct: that the card represents Beth, and therefore, she is at the heart of the issue...I should expect to hear from her in the near future. But, how do I know for sure that this was, in fact, an objective, intuitive interpretation??? Maybe instead it was my fear getting in the way....it is easier to put it in her hands than for me to take action in the situation...therefore, I read into the card the answer that suits me.... Options/What I Can Do: 7 of Wands: OK....now, if we are to assume that there is one standard meaning for this card (which I personally do not, especially as I am reading more intuitively and relying less on book meanings).....let's call this one: Victory through courage....having the upper hand or advantage. Sounds good, right??? Sounds like I don't really need to do anything at the moment, except wait for Beth to contact me, and when she does I am confident that the interaction will be positive (according to the meaning I have just mentioned). BUT....what is the reversed meaning of the 7 of Wands??? Vulnerability, losing ground, feeling inaccurate, insecure... Hmmm....that doesn't sound good at all!!! Now, since I do not use reversed cards, I again rely on my intuition to determine which meaning applies in a given situation. Well.....if I go with the positive, upright meaning, I have to ask the question: is this truly intuitive....or am I seeing what I want to see???? Outcome: 4 of Pentacles: Upright: security, financial stability, solid investments. Reversed: insecurity, stinginess, fear, lack of trust, on shaky ground. Hmmmm......again, I need to go with my intuition here, and try not to be influenced by my own emotions....or what I would like the outcome to be.... I hope that by using this example, I have been able to illustrate my issue more clearly.... Any suggestions, advice etc. would be greatly appreciated! :) Luna

crystal cove	04 May 2004
I can't say I have that problem. I go out of my way not to engage in wishful thinking; of course, I'm always harder on myself than others. :D The way I see it, I can justify a reading all I want but it won't make it happen; plus, it would cheapen my tarot reading and that's a feeling I don't want. Bottom line for me is; I want the TRUTH. There isn't much to be gained in fooling oneself. Guarding against wishful thinking is an ongoing process; however, with practice it becomes easier. For starters, come up with 2 or 3 different scenarios for your reading. Choose one and see what actually transpires. Using a journal helps. It's hard to dispute the outcome when its written down. ;) After a while, take a good look at your readings. How accurate are you? In what areas do you accurately predict the outcome? In what areas are you weak? That will tell you all you need to know.

Mojo	04 May 2004
Quote: Originally posted by lunakasha [font=centaur] Intuition or Wishful Thinking? [/font] A little bit of both, although I would call it projection rather than wishful thinking, which would allow for negative outcomes. And the exact same is true with readings for others. It's a little bit intuition and a little bit fabrication based on your own biases/empathy/projection/gut-feelings.

crystal cove	04 May 2004
In trying to figure out who the Queen of Wands is you may want to consider some of this Queen's weaknesses: tempermental, skeptical, controlling, self-centered, intolerant, jealous, quick to anger, proud, obstinate, revengeful, unfaithful, pushy, catty, malicious; after all, this WAS a falling out. Having said that, I generally believe that when doing a reading where I'm involved, the court card is usually about what I should be doing or what I am doing to contribute to the situation. I personally suspect that the Queen is you and that you should initiate contact. I think this card is calling for action. I'm not sure what deck you're using but generally its the 6 of wands that indicate victory. Not that there won't be a victory with the 7 of wands, but the focus of this card is generally one of hard work and things being up in the air. 7 brings instability to the mix. Numerologically it means understanding, knowledge, and analysis. I think it's possible that this card is asking you to get down and dirty to hash this out with your friend and come to some resolution, good or bad. The 4 of disks does indicate stability, but it can also mean stagnation. I take this to mean stability if you resolve this with your friend, and stagnation if you don't. All in all, I don't see the outcome here. I see this reading as a message to take action and resolve it, one way or another. Even if the friendship ends, at least you don't have to wonder about it all.

mj07	04 May 2004
lunakasha and twenty-one: first L, your struggle with how to interpret the cards and then T's response illustrates to me, again, how hard it can be to decipher meanings of cards for a situation close to ourselves! it might not just be a matter of wishful thinking, but of being two close to the situation. For me, that's why #1 I like to post confusing readings under Your Readings to get advice from others and #2 why it's sometimes good to go to another person for a reading (in my case, a professional). just a couple thoughts!

ros	04 May 2004
I can only read for myself when I'm very grounded & nothing is bothering me. I try to read like I'm reading for someone else & then I try to listen to what I have just said about the card. I feel when we read for ourselves we have to detach ourselves from the situation we are asking about and that in itself takes practice and energy.

lionette	04 May 2004
I almost primarily read for myself... For me this is an issue of using the cards to delve deeper into my own feelings. The cards are more often reflective of present mood than predictive, but that definitely depends upon how I've phrased the question. I often feel as if there's at least some wishful thinking involved, but maybe that's an element part of the process? Seems to me that if we stay positive about a scenario/dilemma, it's alot easier to discover solutions or alternative perspectives. For your question/example above, I'd have used at least 5 cards and maybe the Pentagram spread or maybe a 10 card Pyramid to give more information and not have only the Queen Wands. Another alternative I would use to find out more is spread 3 more cards to describe QWands. Another spread for something like this could be Rachel Pollack's Work Cycle where the cards can tell more of a story and flesh out what might happen between present situation and outcome. Hope it helps! :)

lunakasha	04 May 2004
I just want to thank everyone for all of your comments, suggestions and especially twenty-one, for your insights into my sample reading....much appreciated! :D I would like to attempt to answer some questions that have been posted here...I apologize for not quoting, but I am kind of in a rush right now.... mj mentioned that it is difficult to read for oneself because one is too close to the situation....YES, thank you!!!:) This is exactly what I have been trying to figure out for myself, LOL!!! I guess maybe I should have posted the question differently....this is what I wanted to talk about, rather than "wishful thinking".... Like twenty-one, I do make a very deliberate effort NOT to be biased when reading for myself, or others for that matter.... Someone mentioned keeping a journal to measure accuracy, which I do....I journal EVERYTHING! :D And I have found that so far my readings have been pretty accurate...so maybe I am worrying too much about this.... I will take all of your advice to heart and will continue working on this as I continue my tarot studies....trusting the intuition has been a very gradual process for me....and worth every minute spent on it.... :) Luna

The Self-readings: Intuition or Wishful Thinking? thread was originally posted on 02 May 2004 in the Using Tarot Cards board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Using Tarot Cards, or read more archived threads.