To question or not to question, that is the question...

Thread originally posted on the Aeclectic Tarot Forum on 08 Jun 2005, and now archived in the Forum Library.

tmgrl2	08 Jun 2005
I have been thinking about how I read now, versus how I did when I started about a year and a half ago... I recently opened a thread about dealing. Now...I am questioning the question.... If you look at this link to "using Tarot cards": http://tarotforum.net/showthread.php?t=15119 there is a whole list of threads on The Question.... I'm hoping, once again, since we have so many new members, that we can reopen this topic....since I find that often my sitter doesn't HAVE a question and I wind up doing an "open" or "general reading." Not infrequently, we wind up in an area of life...since the cards take us there and as the process unfolds, up comes Questions .... When I read for myself or for someone else here at AT, I find I often do have a question about a particular area of my life, as do others.... When my sitter comes into my office and we chat as we set up...sometimes a topic comes forward and then, together, we formulate a question that is suitable for a Tarot reading. Most of the time, however, they have no question. What have you all found? What do you do as a practice? Question or no question? Hoping to get more good ideas and input as always.... terri

Ace	08 Jun 2005
I have struggled with that for a long time, tmgrl2. If I were doing an extended reading, that is not a problem. We can dig for answers as long as it takes. But if I am at a party, trying to work through fast, a question is a good idea or the reading is so general, the querent doesn't feel like they got anything. I have found something that I have been using for a couple of weeks that I think is useful anyway: I have them pull one card to ask what information would be useful for them. That seems to "create" a question that we can then answer with more cards. Ace

Astra	08 Jun 2005
When I don't have a specific question, I tend to say "tell me something that will be useful". I used to find that a general reading tended to bring up all all sorts of emotional baggage, which, while it was impressive to the querent, didn't do a whole lot of good for either of us. When I start out asking for something useful, then if I get an emotional issue, there's a shot at untangling it, and possibly resolving it, or it wouldn't have come up.

tmgrl2	08 Jun 2005
Ace wrote: I have found something that I have been using for a couple of weeks that I think is useful anyway: I have them pull one card to ask what information would be useful for them. That seems to "create" a question that we can then answer with more cards. Ace I like this idea...so, if I "read" you correctly, Ace...you would pull a card and maybe use the suit as an "area" of life....like cups...for spiritual/emotional/love? Parties are unique...in that the readings would probably be shorter and to be too general or broad, it may not help the person leave with some "seed" of guidance. I like this. terri

tmgrl2	08 Jun 2005
Astra wrote: When I don't have a specific question, I tend to say "tell me something that will be useful". I used to find that a general reading tended to bring up all all sorts of emotional baggage, which, while it was impressive to the querent, didn't do a whole lot of good for either of us. When I start out asking for something useful, then if I get an emotional issue, there's a shot at untangling it, and possibly resolving it, or it wouldn't have come up. So, Astra...what you would do is ask the sitter, "What would be useful to you today?" That why they don't have to formulate a specific QUESTION which you might wind up having to rework anyhow, especially if it is a Yes/No or if they want specific "predictions." Also, I sometimes keep in mind: Money Ambition Travel Careers Health Expectations Sex/love MATCHES....I may throw these out as topics, since I have the acronym memorized...I really wait till my sitter is settled and I learn a bit about what they know about or expect from the Tarot. Great idea, though...asking what they may find "useful." terri

Astra	08 Jun 2005
tmgrl2, I don't ask the querent, I ask the cards to come up with something useful to the querent. Neither one of us has any idea what is going to come up when I lay the cards out. Granted, this generally won't work for a fast-paced gig, since it generally takes some time for the layout to resolve into something coherent. I don't try (or, rather, I try NOT) to keep any specific topics in mind while I'm doing it - so that I don't have any preconceptions that might nudge the cards beforehand.

tmgrl2	08 Jun 2005
Astra...I think what you do is pretty much what I do. If the sitter is new to Tarot especially...I don't make it a point to "ask" the cards before, but simply get quiet and focus and allow myself to be open to what turns up as the reading progresses and the interactive process moves along. I misunderstood you. And I didn't mean to imply that I "offer" topics through MATCHES. This is a good discussion to revive. I say...well let's see what the cards bring forwad, then, that can be of some guidance. Very often, a whole area will come up. I am reminded of one I did for someone who owns a business. I knew very little about her personally and she was somewhat cautious about getting reading (Catholic background...like mine...) Well, we gots lots of pentacles/coins....along with some Trumps...and it became clear as we progressed that the focus was to do with business. She was not a talker...near the end of the reading, she said... You can't know how this has affected me. I have been asked to buy out the business in which I am now a partner...Please don't tell anyone else about this. She followed the guidance about opening up to someone she trusts to get more input (she said she rarely if ever discusses these matters with anyone, not even her husband)...(we got the hierophant)... After a vacation in the islands with a friend, she came running up to me and said, "I opened up about all of my fears and concerns about the business and about what I was doing with my work with leukemia society..(100 mile bike rides in a day, here in NY and in Lake Tahoe)...and good things just seem to fall in place. So....this is my usual way of operating unless the sitter comes in with an area, a topic.... If they ask me about what areas Tarot covers...that's when I might run through my acronym...and tell them some about the Trumps and the pip cards and suits and numbers....a little. terri

WalesWoman	09 Jun 2005
How about a spread for "the question I want to know but am afraid to ask?" When I first began asking for readings, years before I got a deck and began to study, I realized that I did avoid specific questions, simply because I was afraid that the answer might not be something I wanted to hear or that because I lived in a fish bowl, that I would expose my "secrets" to another and be teased about them. Or that voicing the question might actually create a situation that might not have existed at that point? When I want to do a reading but really don't know what to ask, I usually phrase a 'What do I need to know or pay attention to?', basically guidance to get on or stay on course or areas to focus on.

Ace	09 Jun 2005
I use the one card I pull as a quick reading. It tells me what is a big issue that the person would like more information about. Then I have them pull three cards to discuss that issue in more detail. To Answer the question the first card asked. It sometimes works, but it a party situation it may not. But at least I can get a this is where you are, and they walk away suitably amazed. Many times that is enough. If I were doing a big, leisurely reading, like Astra, I would look for what is useful for them. Only very recently did I realize that what I was doing was looking for information that I thought they SHOULD know. Now I look for information they WANT to know. Not, telling them what they want to hear, but telling them what they (in their head) want to know about. Ace

Rogan	09 Jun 2005
When I first joined Aeclectic - I read something which Ive used time and time again since reading it... "When you go to a doctor, you dont sit there and say "Well... YOU tell me what's wrong..." you go there with symptoms, you tell the doctor your symptoms, and the doctor perscribes... I see Tarot the same. Its not a magic show - I believe the Querent should tell you what to look into - And you go from there...

jmd	09 Jun 2005
well, tmgrl2, you certainly seem to have captured all the burning issues with that acronym... and can even then use them for truer tooth-pick type readings :) Though I agree with Rogan that if I go to a doctor she or he may very well ask for my symptoms to be described, this will only be the case if I go with specific symptoms. I may go for a general checkup, and my Chinese doctor may check my pulse and my tongue, and, without any questions about symptoms, begin to 'read' me. This is also a legitimate way to 'read'. Further, if I go to a specialist who for earlier reasons decides to take a scan of some kind, I do not expect to begin to discuss my symptoms, but rather for him or her to read the image from the scan. Again, a similarity. One may very well begin with a general discussion, but, for myself, I actually often prefer to begin with a brief reading done 'cold', so to speak, to actually warm up the issue and allow for a whole narrative to emerge and, perhaps with increased interaction, zoom in on certain aspects.

Astra	09 Jun 2005
yes, tmgrl2, pretty much the same, I think. I like your acronym, btw, but does it cover something like 'your landlord just decided to sell the building your apartment is in and you may want to think about moving'? Sorry, gotta poke holes in everything, but I DO like it, and will keep it in mind for future reference. Sometimes when things are stuck, a list like that can be incredibly helpful. Ace, I find that what will be useful and what the querent wants to know may have nothing to do with each other. After all, the burning question that may not be asked is "is my boyfriend cheating?". Will the answer be useful? Maybe in one out of a hundred cases.

tao51	09 Jun 2005
My first reading with a new deck is never a question. I usually ask it to show me what I need to know. Now, over the years, I have had many a querent who did not know how to state a qusetion or exactly what they wanted to know. I request the cards show me the querent's worries. I have spread the cards without anything but a request to show me. I have had perceptive readings in these cases. A question is easier to use.--Tao

tmgrl2	09 Jun 2005
jmd wrote: One may very well begin with a general discussion, but, for myself, I actually often prefer to begin with a brief reading done 'cold', so to speak, to actually warm up the issue and allow for a whole narrative to emerge and, perhaps with increased interaction, zoom in on certain aspects. As read all of the additional posts, I have to say that this last paragraph, by you, jmd, struck me as being the way I most like to work. I really don't know much of the How I am going to read until someone sits down with me and we talk. Certainly, if someone comes in with a burning question or topic, we will talk about the question/topic, reword, if necessary and then I will do a short reading on that question or topic... Since most of my private clients come for an hour reading, that leaves me time to do a somewhat longer reading where I can expand and also allow other areas to emerge as we integrate the original question with other areas that arise.... Also, I find that as I weave the narrative and near the closing of the reading, I sum up key elements, key pieces of guidance, make sure that the sitter is clear on what we have discussed together....I hope that the person leaves with a "seed" or two of practical guidance, something that they can put into action to start the growth....and blossoming of the plant.... Some of my sitters are people I interact with on a regular basis...my personal trainer, the owner of the gym, my masseuse...so I do get ongoing feedback from things we have discussed... Others I never know...nor do I need to know...again, as we have discussed in another thread, this session, if it is to be only one session...isn't tarot therapy. Hopefully, it will generate something that the sitter can hold on to as a goal, an outcome, a starting point...something hopeful. When I use my own spread, the Four of Swords, which is a five-card spread, I find it is a good starting point....and I often pull additional cards for some positions...or pull out another deck, like my 22-card Le Tarot Mystique as a closing "message" or summary...I really let the interaction and discussion drive the direction and the number of cards. Sometimes, the five cards carry us for the hour! As for the querent being able to tell us what to examine or to give us a question...often they don't have a specific question...more likely that they have an area they want to look at....work, relationships, emotions..... That is a fine starting point for me...and if they don't have that, then I am perfectly comfortable letting the cards speak with us. Thanks everyone...the beauty of a discussion like this, is that we see how many different styles people have developed....all of them "right" since they seem to work for the individual reader... I have found myself shaping my style, though, as I participate in these threads here at AT. terri

mythos	09 Jun 2005
I rarely read for others. I was a social worker for years ... did heaps of psychotherapy etc, and then trained and worked in alternative therapies. For me, enough is enough. But, on those rare occasions when I do read for someone. I ask them to focus on the question, "What is the main thing on your mind right now?" This question can by-pass the obvious, and get to the key problem fairly quickly. Then I get them to draw a card. We discuss the card in relation to the issue that shows itself. From the discussion, I'll then ask another question. The sitter draws another card. We discuss it in relation to what's come up, and combine it with the first card ... and so on until we have worked our way through the issue and all its tangents. I guess that it is a very 'counselling-therapy' approach, but we seem to get to the crux of the matter pretty quickly, working our way through the issues into solutions, new perspectives etc. I don't like working with spreads ... I find them too constraining. It's a very interactive approach, with the sitter examining the card and pointing out what strikes him/her , and answering my questions about what it means for them... we usually pick a summary card at the end...then draw all the information together. mythos

tmgrl2	09 Jun 2005
mythos....another "system" that works...that's the beauty of the Tarot! I, too, did much counseling over the years in both of my professions. No doubt much of what I have learned in my work experiences come into play when I read....that is part of what makes us the readers we are. Thank you for sharing. Many people work without a spread. I noticed that at a couple of fairs ...they would draw a card, talk, draw more...and so one...those readings are usually 15 minutes long, though. Also, you use an interactive method...a process...that building of rapport and exchange is so important, I feel. terri

Fudugazi	09 Jun 2005
mythos wrote: I don't like working with spreads ... I find them too constraining. It's a very interactive approach, with the sitter examining the card and pointing out what strikes him/her , and answering my questions about what it means for them... we usually pick a summary card at the end...then draw all the information together. I like that approach! When I read face-to-face, I tend to ask the querent to pull cards in small groups - two or three at a time - and I'll talk with him/her about them - all depending how talkative they are. They might ask questions - what does this mean, where do you see this? Then we can go on to two or three more. Sometimes it adds up to a spread, and sometimes just to some random cards. I rarely read more than 9 cards. Sometimes 3 cards are enough. But I'm experimenting with various ways right now. I also notice that quite often people will ask a question, but the cards answer something else. Normally, when I suggest it (tactfully), they will say - well yes, I was thinking about that. So unless they have some burning question they really DO want answered and which will be uppermost, I tell them just to think of what they want to know and we go from the general to the specific during the reading. I find tarot is good for coming to the point of what people need. Some people have trouble expressing exactly what is bothering them, some fear to say it out loud and are helped by symbolic images. I've lost count of the number of times when people have picked up a card and said - "this is me" or "this is my mother-in-law".

tmgrl2	09 Jun 2005
Helvetica wrote: So unless they have some burning question they really DO want answered and which will be uppermost, I tell them just to think of what they want to know and we go from the general to the specific during the reading. I find tarot is good for coming to the point of what people need. Some people have trouble expressing exactly what is bothering them, some fear to say it out loud and are helped by symbolic images. I've lost count of the number of times when people have picked up a card and said - "this is me" or "this is my mother-in-law". Helvetica...I find this to be so true...it is the process... and when court cards appear, either I or my sitter often know quite soon who the court card could represent...the reading shapes itself with our interaction. terri

mercenary30	09 Jun 2005
If they don't have a specific question, then I ask about a topic of concern. Things like work, love, business, family life and such is certainly enough info to start flipping cards over. Usually if they are seeking me out for reading there is something on their mind....... There is always the open reading of course. My favorite is done using the 12 houses of the Zodiac, but for a paid reading that would take an awful long time to complete!!

Ace	09 Jun 2005
I like the 12 houses spread too, but for a party, it takes too long. But it is a good way to cover EVERYTHING. Ace

tmgrl2	09 Jun 2005
mercenary30 wrote: Usually if they are seeking me out for reading there is something on their mind....... Yes...I agree Merc! It always surprises me when people are anxious for a reading and then say they have nothing in particular they want me to address....We get to the bottom of things though.... mwahhaaha.... (LOL).... I've not seen you lately here...I loved our circle...would love to do another...but oh the time involved.... I still have my eagle, my ankh, the Page of Swords (it just came up again in a reading done for me). Back on topic... Zodiac, indeed! I know NOTHING about this.....but sounds like a great reading! terri

The To question or not to question, that is the question... thread was originally posted on 08 Jun 2005 in the Using Tarot Cards board, and is now archived in the Forum Library. Read the active threads in Using Tarot Cards, or read more archived threads.