Rooftop reading (warning, heavy...sorry)

http://www.tarotforum.net/showthread.php?t=158085 <--- this is the spread, check it out. And no, I did not do this reading on a rooftop XP I'm actually at school, parked in a corner on the floor. Although when it stops raining, I think it would be so cool to do Tarot on the roof.

1. THE STAR: this reminded me of that one joke "I'm an agnostic dyslexic insomniac. I lay awake all night wondering if there really is a dog". This card fits... a lot. I cannot tell you how many times I've laid awake, cried myself to sleep, and basically wasted away the hours wondering if I'm ever going to get 'better', if I'm ever going to be 'normal', if there is even a reason for hope. So I can see where this fits.

2. ACE OF CUPS: the thing that I... hate the most about myself, regret the most, is the fact that I do nothing with myself. I have no social life, I don't do any clubs, I rarely do any of my passions (read, Flute, Guitar, Writing, art), I simply sit on the computer, drifting from Facebook, to Youtube, to here. I have always been told I have so much potential... so where the hell is it?

3. THE EMPRESS: The first thing that came to mind is my mother. If I could express in words what she means to me, I would...but everything seems cliche and wrong. She mean so freaking much to me. But also... the Empress is about being caring, and being a mother, and the happiest moments in my life were when I was helping others. On the ranch, in the classroom, at church. Hell, I will seek out people that need a shoulder to cry on, just so that I can give them that support. Maybe it's because I wanted it so freaking bad once. BUT ANYWAY, I can see where this card would play in... glad it came up.

4. REVERSED TOWER: As weird as it sounds... I like the tower. And the Hanged Man, and 9 of swords. They just grab me. But I digress. The Tower... my final mark on the world, in a way. I've been reading up on reversed Taower, and can't seem to get a straight answer. Best answer I can come up with is actually from a song "Her prince finally came to save her and the rest you can figure out But it was a trick And the clock struck twelve Well make sure to build your home brick by boring brick or the wolf's gonna blow it down keep your feet on the ground when your head's in the clouds Well go get your shovel And we'll dig a deep hole To bury the castle, bury the castle"
Yes long... but that's all I've got right now

Deck used: Shadowscape Tarot... I think my Dragon Tarot is mad at me

Kreative-Dragon said:

http://www.tarotforum.net/showthread.php?t=158085 <--- this is the spread, check it out. And no, I did not do this reading on a rooftop XP I'm actually at school, parked in a corner on the floor. Although when it stops raining, I think it would be so cool to do Tarot on the roof.

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If my roof wasn't under construction I would SOO do that right now. Haha, when I was in school I chilled in corners with my cards all the time.

1. THE STAR: this reminded me of that one joke "I'm an agnostic dyslexic insomniac. I lay awake all night wondering if there really is a dog". This card fits... a lot. I cannot tell you how many times I've laid awake, cried myself to sleep, and basically wasted away the hours wondering if I'm ever going to get 'better', if I'm ever going to be 'normal', if there is even a reason for hope. So I can see where this fits.

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Nuck formal. That being said it does seem as though this card is fitting. You doubt faith, you doubt confidence, you question what this world means to you and vice versa.

2. ACE OF CUPS: the thing that I... hate the most about myself, regret the most, is the fact that I do nothing with myself. I have no social life, I don't do any clubs, I rarely do any of my passions (read, Flute, Guitar, Writing, art), I simply sit on the computer, drifting from Facebook, to Youtube, to here. I have always been told I have so much potential... so where the hell is it?

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Well potential wise you do seem to understand these cards quite concisely. My first impression is that you regret your emotions, and what you haven't shown. Continue like this and your life will end up with "I should have said" "should have done" "if only they knew" but it's all up to you to change. Get out your longboard and just ride. Be more outgoing, strike up a conversation with a complete stranger at open mic night because you like the giant flower on their bike. Once you make those things habits, it'll come so much more naturally.

3. THE EMPRESS: The first thing that came to mind is my mother. If I could express in words what she means to me, I would...but everything seems cliche and wrong. She mean so freaking much to me. But also... the Empress is about being caring, and being a mother, and the happiest moments in my life were when I was helping others. On the ranch, in the classroom, at church. Hell, I will seek out people that need a shoulder to cry on, just so that I can give them that support. Maybe it's because I wanted it so freaking bad once. BUT ANYWAY, I can see where this card would play in... glad it came up.

Click to expand...

I've done this spread three times, and have helped with it once (this being the second time) and this seems to be the position everyone kind of just looks at the card, its meaning, and smiles. That's what the song the spread is based on is about, and I'm glad this position seems to get that reaction.
You definitely seem like an empress person (recalling your friends three card reading with the devil) so rest assured whatever you saw in your mother is more than likely in yourself as well.

4. REVERSED TOWER: As weird as it sounds... I like the tower. And the Hanged Man, and 9 of swords. They just grab me. But I digress. The Tower... my final mark on the world, in a way. I've been reading up on reversed Taower, and can't seem to get a straight answer. Best answer I can come up with is actually from a song "Her prince finally came to save her and the rest you can figure out But it was a trick And the clock struck twelve Well make sure to build your home brick by boring brick or the wolf's gonna blow it down keep your feet on the ground when your head's in the clouds Well go get your shovel And we'll dig a deep hole To bury the castle, bury the castle"
Yes long... but that's all I've got right now

Click to expand...

Brick by Boring Brick. Definitely fits. It's about learning to be realistic and working with reality instead of hiding, building an unstable tower, and just letting them fall. You said you want to be the shoulder to cry on? Don't sell yourself short, this card says to me you're more of a rock.