1 sitter - 2 readers - can you pose same question?!

olivia1

Grizabella said:
It never seems to occur to people that perhaps that person isn't so much seeking an answer to a question till they hear what they want to hear. Maybe they just don't know of any other question to ask and they really came just to have another human being listen to them and pay attention to them. We can't really know.

I understand the feeling of wanting to be heard by someone. I have been there myself. But i also understand that we are all different. Therefore, just because I personally wouldn't ask the same question multiple times on a Reading Exchange forum (for the simple fact that I wanted to be heard and wanted attention) doesn't mean everyone else should follow my example. I'm not even a good example most of the time anyway. However, I am genuinely lost as to why someone would choose a reading exchange forum out of all the places on AT. isnt that what Talking Tarot or Chat is for? I'm not trying to be mean or snarky...I'm genuinely trying to understand the logic behind it.

Grizabella

Well, I wasn't referring to seeker7 when I said that part, olivia. I was referring to the average sitter who may come to me in person, you know?

Talking Tarot isn't the place to get readings, obviously. If she wanted to seek out two readers to ask the same question of, she wouldn't do it in Talking Tarot. The Reading Exchange forum is the place to do that. In fact, asking for readings anywhere else on AT isn't even allowed, I don't think.

While it's true that sometimes we have people join just to abuse the Reading Exchange forum by getting free readings and not leaving feedback or a reciprocal reading, seeker7 isn't one of those. I get the impression that's what some of the people who are posting are suggesting or alluding to but I've never gotten that impression from her. She seems to me to have done or wants to do exactly what she's asking about here----having a reading from more than one sitter to compare the two readings. I don't see anything wrong with that. Obviously, since it's bothering some folks, doing as AJ has suggested may be a better idea for her. That way, those who wish to participate can and everyone else can just choose to read the posts or not, but hopefully they'll go their own way without harsh judgments.

DownwardSpiral

Grizabella said:
I also don't see why it should bother other readers how many times she chooses to ask the same question.

I know I'm not being singled out on this.....I had said if she asked every question twice....No.......NOT because I have a problem with it....I could care less....only because she would probably get flack about it like she is in this thread.

Grizabella makes an excellent point about there not being a shortage of readers.

Grizabella

I wasn't singling anyone out. Just making a general statement.

I thought AJ had a really good idea, and maybe it will become something people who are curious to experiment will adapt for their own use. That way it will eliminate it appearing wrong to some people and still be a useful method of experimentation to those who are curious about that particular thing.

Melia

Grizabella said:
While it's true that sometimes we have people join just to abuse the Reading Exchange forum by getting free readings and not leaving feedback or a reciprocal reading, seeker7 isn't one of those. I get the impression that's what some of the people who are posting are suggesting or alluding to but I've never gotten that impression from her. She seems to me to have done or wants to do exactly what she's asking about here----having a reading from more than one sitter to compare the two readings. I don't see anything wrong with that.

Totally agree.

The discussion here shows there IS a hidden expectation by some (a lot of) readers that sitters should at some time provide a reading for others as well. While readers can stipulate who they will read for, or under what conditions (and this is fair enough), please consider that some people may not wish to read for others in a public forum (whatever their reasons). Other members are new to tarot and probably do not feel they have the skills or perhaps confidence to read publicly for others, as as already been stated. I am sure there are also a percentage who join because they are curious about tarot and probably, for them, that is all tarot will be - a curiosity. Some I’m sure give 'freely' in other areas of this forum with no fanfare. Please don't let the few who really abuse the reading exchange detrimentally affect the way you now read for most others.

seeker7

gypsylady said:
Just to point out, seeing as you were kind of passive aggressive in thanking Grizabella and stating that she sets a good example for newbies when you were just asking for honest opinions from all of us on this thread.

How is thanking someone for agreeing with my point of view being passive aggressive?! Are you serious!!!!

Like Grizabella mentioned as well, the readings are being publicly offered and I offered to take them.... readings are offered all the time in the 'reading exchange' section. How can someone sit there and judge who 'needs' a reading more than others! The section is not for those in 'need' of a reading!!!

As a newbie you should know that this whole forum is a learning forum and it is usually a learning forum for those wanting to develop or learn more about the art of tarot.

By taking an offer for a reading I was not taking someone else's oxygen! It is no life and death matter. I have been with AT for almost 2 years now and I have only sat for readings on that section very recently because I never got involved with it and thought I'd try it out!! It was new grounds for me to explore!

DownwardSpiral said:
Ya know the saying "curiosity killed the cat"? LOL

One of the reasons I like to read the "your readings" is to see the different intepretations of the cards and the reading itself. It helps me to understand the cards better. You could always do your own reading....post it in "your readings" and still have fun seeing what everyone else comes up with : )

Haha! I know it too well!! .... I am active in that section, not as active as I'd like to be but like I have mentioned in a previous post, I have given dozens of interpretations in the 'Your Readings' section with absolutely no expectations from person requesting that interpretation!

olivia1 said:
I understand the feeling of wanting to be heard by someone. I have been there myself. But i also understand that we are all different. Therefore, just because I personally wouldn't ask the same question multiple times on a Reading Exchange forum (for the simple fact that I wanted to be heard and wanted attention) doesn't mean everyone else should follow my example. I'm not even a good example most of the time anyway. However, I am genuinely lost as to why someone would choose a reading exchange forum out of all the places on AT. isnt that what Talking Tarot or Chat is for? I'm not trying to be mean or snarky...I'm genuinely trying to understand the logic behind it.

I think Grizabella picked up on the main points here and as I agree with what she said I won't bother repeating!

However, I wanted to add that (as mentioned time and time again!) this whole forum is a learning forum! Every section is a section for learning and development, however, the focus of the sections varies!

DownwardSpiral said:
I know I'm not being singled out on this.....I had said if she asked every question twice....No.......NOT because I have a problem with it....I could care less....only because she would probably get flack about it like she is in this thread.

Grizabella makes an excellent point about there not being a shortage of readers.

Yes, I don't think a lot of the people who have commented on this thread sat back to consider me on an individual basis..... it seems like frustration from other sitters they have had or are used to is being vented on here.... it is fine, I can understand and if it makes them feel better then so be it.... however, I will not tolerate offensive comments when they do not know me or have not come across me enough to be able to make those comments!

I cannot help but thank you again Grizabella for taking your time to comment in here, I really appreciate it! And thank you Melia as well, you make a good point which all the readers are by-passing....

Noone is forcing anyone to give any readings! The point of this thread is that I was made to feel bad for asking the same question to two separate readers and I wanted honest viewpoints on this too...

Some of the comments have diverted into irrelevant aspects, and some have been unnecessarily rude/harsh!

I appreciate the comments made in a logical manner and in an attempt to allow me to understand their viewpoints... however, for the other comments trying to be-little me and make me seem like some desperate person desperately seeking out the answer I want, well, try to look inwards a bit more!

If anyone else has a constructive comment on this, I will most welcome it... however, if you want another rant about your average sitter, please find yourself another avenue!

Thank you

Seeker

olivia1

seeker7 said:
I think Grizabella picked up on the main points here and as I agree with what she said I won't bother repeating!

However, I wanted to add that (as mentioned time and time again!) this whole forum is a learning forum! Every section is a section for learning and development, however, the focus of the sections varies!

you keep saying that like someone has missed the point. we all know this is a learning forum! what does my question to Grizabella have anything to do with me questioning what type of forum this is? I simply questioned why, if someone just wanted someone to talk to, they dont just post in Talking Tarot or become a subscriber and post in Chat.

If you post in Reading Exchange because in addition to wanting someone to talk to, you want to develop your own reading skills, and you have questions then that is great. Now it makes more sense to me why you would post in Reading Exchange rather than Chat, etc. when i asked, i genuinely was asking because I did not understand.

And sure, this is a learning forum. We get that. And it may be learning but we are all still different people, with different learning styles and with different opinions on how people should go about interacting in a learning forum. personally, i feel we should all be contributing equally and that it is not fair for one to just have the privilege of critiquing the interpretations and work of other students while not having their work open for others to critique and give their opinions.

Im not singling you out; that goes for everyone. Although, I dont think I am wrong for including you in the example because you are the one who started the thread. I would imagine that just by starting the thread, you would expect for some to include you anyway. But, like i said, everyone is different.if others are fine with doing the reading and letting someone else (sometimes the same people repeatedly) just give feedback then that is their call.

However, I dont really feel that helps anyone much, especially not the person just giving feedback. But that is just my opinion based on my own experiences. Many people on here have told me the best way to learn is by doing. From experience, I have found this true...especially when it comes to tarot. But its your tarot education so of course it is your right to go about it the way you want to.

If you find this post, I genuinely regret that. I just dont understand why you keep driving in the point that this is a learning forum like we have somehow forgotten what type of forum this is. And I dont understand why you are so upset. Yes, you were made to feel bad because clearly someone didn't agree with you but if you dont feel you did anything wrong then why dwell on it. Surely, you dont expect everyone to side with you anyway?

seeker7

olivia1 said:
you keep saying that like someone has missed the point. we all know this is a learning forum! what does my question to Grizabella have anything to do with the forum being a learning forum? I simply said, if someone just wanted someone to talk to, they should post in Talking Tarot or become a subscriber and post in Chat.

If you post in Reading Exchange because in addition to wanting someone to talk to, you want to develop your own reading skills then that is great.

It may be learning but we are all still different people with different opinions on how people should go about interacting in a learning forum. i think we should all be contributing and it isnt fair for just one person to critque and expect readings and just give feedback while one does all reading.

maybe i am misunderstanding but that just seems arrogant and selfish.

Y

I was not after someone to talk to per se! that is something that Grizabella mentioned, and some might fall within that but it was not me!

Yes but again noone is forcing anyone to do ''all the readings'' .... the reader decides to offer free readings... does not ask for anything other than feedback..... why am I suddenly a bad reader for taking up that offer?!!!

Selfish?.... Again... if it is me you are referring to, then again (I am making a point with the repeated 'again'!) if you would read the rest of the thread, I also contribute but in a different way.... like someone else mentioned, I did everything other than deal the cards! So how does that make me selifsh?

If you are out in the streets offering a drink for £1 and someone thinks it's a great deal and that someone pays you that pound and takes the drink... how on earth does that make this someone a selfish/arrogant person!!!

The point of my thread, is that ... again... I was made to feel bad for asking TWO readers the same question and I wanted to understand this more....

I appreciate we are different people.... that is the whole point of me wanting different view points, but like I said, I will not tolerate rude comments... I am not offending anyone, nor giving out rude comments to anyone, so I really don't want others to do that to me!

I came here open-mindedly to understand something yet I seem to be this self-centred, passive aggressive, selfish and arrogant person!!!

olivia1

seeker7 said:
I was not after someone to talk to per se! that is something that Grizabella mentioned, and some might fall within that but it was not me!

Yes but again noone is forcing anyone to do ''all the readings'' .... the reader decides to offer free readings... does not ask for anything other than feedback..... why am I suddenly a bad reader for taking up that offer?!!!

you are not a "bad reader." from what i am getting from your posts, you are not even a reader but more of a sitter. and that is fine because there are other who simply just want someone to sit for them and not read back.

but since its a public forum, everyone could pretty much see who just likes to leave feedback and who actually reads for others. And its human nature, people do judge.

Selfish?.... Again... if it is me you are referring to, then again (I am making a point with the repeated 'again'!) if you would read the rest of the thread, I also contribute but in a different way.... like someone else mentioned, I did everything other than deal the cards! So how does that make me selifsh?

If you are out in the streets offering a drink for £1 and someone thinks it's a great deal and that someone pays you that pound and takes the drink... how on earth does that make this someone a selfish/arrogant person!!!

That is irrelevant to the point. no one is selling readings on the Reading Exchange forum.

And how do else do you contribute in reading exchange if you do not read others?

to me it sounds arrogant to always critique but never put your own work out for others to also give feedback on because to me, its similar to someone critiquing a piece of art but never really letting others see their work.

and I think its selfish because i think getting readings is fun! I enjoy it immensely but I would feel bad just being read and simply giving feedback. I feel like I should also try to do something to compensate the reader by either paying or giving them a reading too. But others, of course, may also feel different.

The point of my thread, is that ... again... I was made to feel bad for asking TWO readers the same question and I wanted to understand this more....

I appreciate we are different people.... that is the whole point of me wanting di

fferent view points, but like I said, I will not tolerate rude comments... I am not offending anyone, nor giving out rude comments to anyone, so I really don't want others to do that to me!

I came here open-mindedly to understand something yet I seem to be this self-centred, passive aggressive, selfish and arrogant person!!!

actually, you are offending me because you are acting so defensively towards others giving their honest opinion.

But if it really bothers you that others dont agree with you wanting to just be read and giving feedback then either go to their threads (which I would imagine you would be doing anyway) or pay a professional psychic. That is what I do. I give feedback (helps them learn) plus I am paying them...therefore, i dont have to read them back. and everyone is happy.

seeker7

olivia1 said:
That is irrelevant to the point. no one is selling readings on the Reading Exchange forum.

that was simply an example of how I understand the 'exchange' aspect of the readings I was referring to in my thread! I thought that was pretty obvious!!

olivia1 said:
how do else do you contribute in reading exchange if you do not read others?

again... please read the rest of the thread as I am getting tired of repeating myself!

olivia1 said:
if it really bothers you that others dont agree with you wanting to just be read and giving feedback then either go to their threads (which I would imagine you would be doing anyway) or pay a professional psychic. That is what I do. I give feedback (helps them learn) plus I am paying them...therefore, i dont have to read them back. and everyone is happy.

What bothers me is not the difference in opinion.....again.... it is the rudeness of the comments.... there have been the add comment here that did not agree with me, but the way they offered their opinion was constructively and helpful and it really made me understand their view points, and if you'd read the rest of the thread, you would see that I thanked them for their opinion and stated I would follow some suggestions.....

I did exactly that.... I asked to sit on a reading offer for ones wanting feedback only.... please read the rest of the thread, this is getting incredibly tedious!!