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starrystarrynight  starrystarrynight is offline
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starrystarrynight 

I love words and playing with them, but I think the etymology of advice is probably Latin (someone will jump in and correct this if I'm wrong):

ad (to or toward) and videre (to see).

So, getting advice is all about moving toward seeing a situation more clearly. If you go around asking for others to confirm what you already believe, that would be more like validation.

But, then again, I guess seeking advice could lead you toward vice if you're merely using it for validation.

p.s. Welcome to the newbies!
Top   #11
Justatraveler  Justatraveler is offline
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Heh...


I see what you are all saying here--and yes, I am referring*others* asking me or those I know for advice--but the fact that you have certain people that you usually go to when you're overstimulated, confused and overwhelmed illustrates my point. We are attracted to those who see things in such a way as we can accept. In your confusion you go to the same person or group to order your mind / universe for you, but you go back to the same person/people because they originate the kind of communication that you are willing to accept.

The world is awash with communication, and you choose exactly what communication you are going to receive and accept. You are attracted to the communication that you are looking for, that at a deeper than the "la-dee-dah" level of consciousness, you already know to be so. If you don't like what you're seeing/feeling/thinking (or, as a few of you pointed out to me, are stuck within ridges that you cannot make heads or tails out of without a coin), you replace your own looking with someone else's.

I see that I left out (intentionally) the occasional searcher for help in my original tongue-in-cheek post, the person that does NOT make a habit out of using the acknowledgment, validation, and direction of others to stave off having to work out their conflicting mental computations and emotional junk that keeps them substituting others' communication and orders (pun intended) for their own.

Joking aside, I am advocating that career ad-vice givers become aware of potentially enabling children not to grow up. Instead of giving the same people advice over and over, maybe direct your clients/friends to work off the baggage that keeps them so blind and overwhelmed and desperate as to use someone else's eyes instead of their own...again, and again, and again.

Just another way of looking at the moneychangers at the temple.
Top   #12
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I don't know about that. I go to people I trust. Many have given me very painful advice, but because I trust them, I take it seriously. And I have more than once been told things I did NOT want to hear, and which went directly against what I wanted to hear....
Top   #13
Justatraveler  Justatraveler is offline
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Add-vice


Perhaps some clarification is in order: by "kind of communication" I am including chronic/consistent contexts, emotion and support material that the communication comes packaged in as well. When people like what they're getting from somewhere, they go back.

I would only caution you against the *habit* of replacing your own seeing, and communication with yourself, with that of others. Owning communication sources, that is, accepting and agreeing with communication and direction BECAUSE it originated from certain trusted sources, and not based upon the specific CONTENT of the advice, is a dangerous (albeit common) behavior within cliques, families, religions and political parties.

When a person makes a *habit* of replacing seeing and resolving the mental/emotional blockages that keep them embroiled in whatever significances and drama their occluded view affords them (to the extent that they so often "need" another person to look out of the window and tell them what is there), advice truly has become ad-vice...for, even if this emotionally overwhelmed and overstimulated dramatist is lucky enough to find among the blind a guide with even one eye, enabling someone's inability or refusal to take responsibility for themselves and their own outcomes is hardly a loving act -- even if they <sniff sniff> cry, and even if they are paying for a tarot reading.

Seeking help makes sense, and I am referring *only* to those who make a HABIT of getting ad-vice from others, the chronic followers who look to others constantly because they have given up on, and have withdrawn from, themselves (and yet continue to pick those who would tell them what they might tell themselves if they weren't addicted to substituting for themselves).

Just another way of looking at it...
Top   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gregory
Ah that sounds like the coin-toss method. If you really can't (or really believe you can't ) decide, toss a coin and see if you're disappointed. Works EVERY time !

LOL!!! That is awesome!!!!

Sadly, what I WANT to do is not always what I SHOULD do. But I like that coin toss suggestion. That's a good one.
Top   #15
Seafra  Seafra is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gregory
Ah that sounds like the coin-toss method. If you really can't (or really believe you can't ) decide, toss a coin and see if you're disappointed. Works EVERY time !
Saw an interesting take on this in a movie I've forgotten everything else about long ago. Person A advised Person B to flip a coin and just before the flip Person A asked "Which do you want?" (ie. heads or tails) and the Person answered. Got the answer w/out the flip.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Traveler
When a person makes a *habit* of replacing seeing and resolving the mental/emotional blockages that keep them embroiled in whatever significances and drama their occluded view affords them (to the extent that they so often "need" another person to look out of the window and tell them what is there), advice truly has become ad-vice...for, even if this emotionally overwhelmed and overstimulated dramatist is lucky enough to find among the blind a guide with even one eye, enabling someone's inability or refusal to take responsibility for themselves and their own outcomes is hardly a loving act -- even if they <sniff sniff> cry, and even if they are paying for a tarot reading.
Sounds like fear-based co-dependency to me. I'd have no problem with it as long as the querent has the money and the reader has the time.

Some people just don't have a healthy or trusted support system. Good to them if they find a reader that meets their needs while not taking advantage of them.
Top   #16
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enchanted spirit  enchanted spirit is offline
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Well, since I believe the Tarot taps into our subconscious, or perhaps something even deeper/larger, I think reading the cards can give us greater insight into situations and therefore can help us make better decisions. Of course there are limits! You cannot commit murder and then claim that you did a reading and got the Death card, so that is what you were supposed to do. You have to use your common sense, just in any other situation. I don't know how many times people have given me advice that was good, but wouldn't work for me. The same is true for Tarot - if I get a negative outcome in a reading I might ask how can I avoid that? Or I might approach the situation with more caution, or perhaps change my mind on how tho handle the situation. But that is still my decision, perhaps based on the reading, or perhaps not.

The other day I had the weirdest horoscope . . . it said basically to not overreact if something awful happened that day. Well, okay! It's basically good advice, but sheesh, that's not what you want to hear for how your day was shaping up astrologically. So, then I spent a good couple hours with that nagging at the back of my mind "what awful thing is going to happen that I shouldn't overreact to?" A car accident? A disaster at work? What? What? WHAT? Finally, it dawned on me that maybe the awful thing was that horoscope and I was overreacting to it. So, I decided to put it out of my mind and IF something awful did happen (which of course could happen any day!) I'd probably remember not to overreact. Well, nothing awful of any consequence happened that day! LOL Things really are what we make of them. Tarot, horoscopes, decisions, it's all about how you handle it.
Top   #17
Maggiemay  Maggiemay is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by red :)
i agree with seeker. i to have tried to use the tarot to validate a thought or idea and had the same experience, i kept getting the same card to.the truth can be harsh but the tarot never shys away from it. it is like a mothers advice .. stern but from the heart.
Totally agree with you and Seeker.

Actually, I am amazed at my Tarot - It never lets me down.

Maggie
Top   #18
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KSPisces  KSPisces is offline
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Quote:
Saw an interesting take on this in a movie I've forgotten everything else about long ago. Person A advised Person B to flip a coin and just before the flip Person A asked "Which do you want?" (ie. heads or tails) and the Person answered. Got the answer w/out the flip.
I wonder if you're talking about the coin-toss scene in No Country For Old Men.

One of the most thought provoking scenes in cinematic history, IMO. (Though admittedly, I'm a bit of a weirdo. )

Quote:
Anton Chigurh: What's the most you ever lost on a coin toss?

Gas Station Proprietor: Sir?

Anton Chigurh: The most. You ever lost. On a coin toss.

Gas Station Proprietor: I don't know. I couldn't say.

[Chigurh flips a quarter from the change on the counter and covers it with his hand]

Anton Chigurh: Call it.

Gas Station Proprietor: Call it?

Anton Chigurh: Yes.

Gas Station Proprietor: For what?

Anton Chigurh: Just call it.

Gas Station Proprietor: Well, we need to know what we're calling it for here.

Anton Chigurh: You need to call it. I can't call it for you. It wouldn't be fair.

Gas Station Proprietor: I didn't put nothin' up.

Anton Chigurh: Yes, you did. You've been putting it up your whole life you just didn't know it. You know what date is on this coin?

Gas Station Proprietor: No.

Anton Chigurh: 1958. It's been traveling twenty-two years to get here. And now it's here. And it's either heads or tails. And you have to say. Call it.

Gas Station Proprietor: Look, I need to know what I stand to win.

Anton Chigurh: Everything.

Gas Station Proprietor: How's that?

Anton Chigurh: You stand to win everything. Call it.

Gas Station Proprietor: Alright. Heads then.

[Chigurh removes his hand, revealing the coin is indeed heads]

Anton Chigurh: Well done.

[the gas station proprietor nervously takes the quarter with the small pile of change he's apparently won while Chigurh starts out]

Anton Chigurh: Don't put it in your pocket, sir. Don't put it in your pocket. It's your lucky quarter.

Gas Station Proprietor: Where do you want me to put it?

Anton Chigurh: Anywhere not in your pocket. Where it'll get mixed in with the others and become just a coin. Which it is.
*sigh... walks off to contemplate life*
Top   #19
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moderndayruth  moderndayruth is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Justatraveler
Perhaps some clarification is in order: by "kind of communication" I am including chronic/consistent contexts, emotion and support material that the communication comes packaged in as well. When people like what they're getting from somewhere, they go back.
I think i understand where you are coming from and myself i gave it a lot of thought... Someone mentioned co-dependance here, external validation - all the right points imo. Some of the most succesful/powerful/influential people i've met - that's from all walks of life - had one thing in common - they didn't ask for external validation... I think that when one asks for advice they are mostly asking for an existing framework of social rules and thinking, of what is acceptable and what is not. What impressed me was that those guys i am mentioning above were actually making their own trends of thinking/validating etc and not trying to fit into the existing social conditioning. As an observer, i think it takes a lot of guts to do that, again - in any chosen field - to basically re-make the existing criteria. Hmmm, i did my best to explain my thoughts here, but i;m not sure i'm making much sense to anyone else apart from myself!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Justatraveler
I would only caution you against the *habit* of replacing your own seeing, and communication with yourself, with that of others. Owning communication sources, that is, accepting and agreeing with communication and direction BECAUSE it originated from certain trusted sources, and not based upon the specific CONTENT of the advice, is a dangerous (albeit common) behavior within cliques, families, religions and political parties.
I agree with you, if i understand what you are saying correctly, basically i was trying to say the same
Top   #20




 


 


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