Need help, please

[mysticangel_001]

A friend of mine recently found out that she is 10 weeks pregnant with her ex-boyfriends baby (she conceived right before she ended the relationship). She has had problems with cancer cells in her cervix and uterus so she is concerned about how that will affect the baby and what it might do to her, health wise? She is very torn on whether or not to abort the baby? She is also involved in a long distance relationship with a man she adores (and he adores her) and she is pretty sure that if she keeps the baby she can kiss him good-bye. I just did a reading on her situation and asked, amongst other things, what she would decide to do in regards to the pregnancy? I got the Death card. Would I take this card as literal? I don't want to tell her that she is going to abort and make her decision for her, based on that card. I know that Death also signifies death and rebirth...starting anew (starting over by herself, raising a new baby on her own?). Ugh...I hate when I get hit with questions like this...HELP!

 

[kmusky]

Frankly, I'd be surprised if the death card didn't come up. She will definitely be undergoing some radical changes in her life, no matter what she does.
Was there a clarification card used?

 

[Allison70]

I agree with kmusky. This woman's life will never be quite the same again, no matter which course she chooses. Hence the death card - life as it used to be is over. As I understand it the death card very rarely means physical death.
I would think in a matter this complicated, a larger spread might be in order?
(Maybe one will suggest that any man who would dump you for keeping a baby will probably find another good reason to dump you later anyway...)

 

[Thirteen]

Ugh...I hate when I get hit with questions like this...HELP!

The Death card is a card of stripping things down to the bare bones, putting an end to things and starting fresh. I think the card is trying to tell YOU how to get her to put aside a lot of things that aren't relevant to the question and get to the real issue.

Here's what I think the card wants you to say to her:

Tell her to imagine that everyone else is out of the picture, all problems gone, and only she exists. If there was nothing else to consider, not the ex, not the cancer, not the new boyfriend, would she keep the baby? Does she want to be a mother? Because once that baby is born, the person she was will be dead, and the person she will be, a mother with a child, WILL be her entire future.

This is not a new car that you can trade in down the line. It's not toy or a pet. it's a child. And every year it will grow, and each and every minute of each and every day she will have to make it her life. Is she ready to feed, diper, soothe, care for the baby when sick? Is she ready to baby proof the house? Deal with temper tantrums? Consider day care, nursery school, elementary school, high school, college?

This is a lifetime commitment. And this and ONLY this is what she needs to think about. If she keeps the child, the person she knows now will die and she will be reborn as the mother of this child.

If all the other factors were erased, not there, would she want to do this? Because if she wants that enough to keep the child, all the other factors can be dealt with, though it might be wise to add that she will never be able to break up completely with her ex, as he will have a say in that child's life as well...forever.

Bring it down to the bare bones. To what really needs to be seen in this question of "death" and "birth." Both you and she are seeing everything else, all the problems and complications. But you're not seeing what will be born out of this "death." And you need to make her see that, to ignore the other stuff and really look at what the future holds for her if she takes that road to motherhood.

 

[mysticangel_001]

Thanks for the help...maybe I will just leave that "question" out of the reading. One thing, the cards I got for what his reaction would be and what he would want are BOTH very positive cards and I can tell when I talk to him that the man is so in love with her that that he would probably be more than happy to raise this baby as his own...now to just get him off the rock (of Gibraltar...literally) and to NY. LOL

 

[mysticangel_001]

This will be their 3rd child...they were together for 8 years but in the past 2 or so years he has become very abusive toward her and even endangered her and the two children they already have by speeding through a store parking lot threatening to kill them all because he wasn't getting his way. She is definitely NOT planning on going back to the ex so he isn't an issue. If she was healthy then she wouldn't think twice about keeping the baby. Unfortunately she has her father telling her to abort because as much as he loves his grandchildren he isn't wanting HIS little girl to risk her life for another child. She is just very confused right now. The doctor told her she has another month, max, to make a decision.

The Death card is a card of stripping things down to the bare bones, putting an end to things and starting fresh. I think the card is trying to tell YOU how to get her to put aside a lot of things that aren't relevant to the question and get to the real issue.

Here's what I think the card wants you to say to her:

Tell her to imagine that everyone else is out of the picture, all problems gone, and only she exists. If there was nothing else to consider, not the ex, not the cancer, not the new boyfriend, would she keep the baby? Does she want to be a mother? Because once that baby is born, the person she was will be dead, and the person she will be, a mother with a child, WILL be her entire future.

This is not a new car that you can trade in down the line. It's not toy or a pet. it's a child. And every year it will grow, and each and every minute of each and every day she will have to make it her life. Is she ready to feed, diper, soothe, care for the baby when sick? Is she ready to baby proof the house? Deal with temper tantrums? Consider day care, nursery school, elementary school, high school, college?

This is a lifetime commitment. And this and ONLY this is what she needs to think about. If she keeps the child, the person she knows now will die and she will be reborn as the mother of this child.

If all the other factors were erased, not there, would she want to do this? Because if she wants that enough to keep the child, all the other factors can be dealt with, though it might be wise to add that she will never be able to break up completely with her ex, as he will have a say in that child's life as well...forever.

Bring it down to the bare bones. To what really needs to be seen in this question of "death" and "birth." Both you and she are seeing everything else, all the problems and complications. But you're not seeing what will be born out of this "death." And you need to make her see that, to ignore the other stuff and really look at what the future holds for her if she takes that road to motherhood.

 

[Thirteen]

This will be their 3rd child

Dude, you could have said. But it doesn't change as much as you think it does. The bare bones question remains. If all else were out of the picture, would she want this baby?

...they were together for 8 years but in the past 2 or so years he has become very abusive toward her and even endangered her and the two children they already have by speeding through a store parking lot threatening to kill them all because he wasn't getting his way. She is definitely NOT planning on going back to the ex so he isn't an issue.

It is an issue. That ex still has to pay child support. That ex could still take her to court and demand visitation rights with his baby. Likewise, that ex isn't going to be there, as he was, with the other two kids, which, on the one hand, might make things easier, but on the other hand means she's got less help and support to raise a baby and two other kids, and she might not be in the best of health while doing it.

But the issue of the ex isn't relevant to the bare bones question. Frankly, getting out of an abusive relationship, having potential cancer and all the rest makes me think that she doesn't need a third child added into the mix--but I'm not her, and her father isn't her, and, once again, this is looking at all the other stuff and not the bare bones.

Her old life is most definitely over. If the new boyfriend and the cancer weren't there, would she want a third child in this new life?

 

[mysticangel_001]

that is true. I will definitely give her that advice and have her try to look at this from a different perspective.
Thanks Thirteen, I know I wouldn't want to be in her place but your advice might be helpful.

 

[The crowned one]

I just did a reading on her situation and asked, amongst other things, what she would decide to do in regards to the pregnancy? I got the Death card. Would I take this card as literal?

Yes you could looking at the card traditionally, but it seems your question is not focused enough for that...."among other things" you say.



Rich or poor, strong or weak, no one escapes death (symbolizing a unavoidable force) and the change it brings. That is what the card tells you. There is change/ending coming and she can not avoid it. Whether it is death or a transformation is unknown as this card does not predict that on its own because of your question ...you need a second card.

Death could be the relationship, as it is over.