other people reading -your- deck?

[Rasa]

I'm not generally of the school of thought where decks have near-sentient 'personalities', and while I do love ritual, I am usually not too particular about how my cards are stored, handled, etc. Generally I'm happy with people touching my cards, and when I read for someone else, I want them to shuffle... I like the idea of everyone putting a little of themselves and their stories into the cards when they are in contact with them. I also adore used decks, and don't 'cleanse' or anything... but I've noticed I have an odd quirk:
For certain decks, I don't want other people to read with them.

If it's not one I use often, I don't care too much. However, if it's a deck I've done a lot of readings with, or that I feel some kind of connection to, it seems almost invasive to have someone else using it for readings.

The first time I experienced this, a good friend wanted to try giving a reading, and asked if he could use my cards. I didn't see any problem with it, so I handed them over, and watched him give the reading to another friend.
I was shocked when I felt -offended-... I was thinking "that's NOT what that card means!!!" as he explained them, and almost angry about it. Normally, I would find it interesting if someone else has different interpretations of a card than I do.. but when the deck was mine, but his ideas about the cards weren't, I felt like there was something disconnected and uncomfortable.

I often bring extra decks for people to borrow when I'm teaching classes, but I'm careful to only offer certain ones that I haven't used much.

Has anyone else had this experience?

 

[Carla]

I've never had this experience as no one touches my decks. I only allow querents to cut the cards, and I don't know anyone else who is even interested in looking at them, let alone read with them.

 

[Grizabella]

Reading this made me think of my VR Gold. I haven't had it out in quite awhile now, but I'm possessive of that one, now that you mention it. Not in the same way, really, because I wouldn't care much if someone else read different meanings in the cards than I do, I don't think. It's just that I feel like a little kid who doesn't want to share a favorite toy. lol "Mine, mine!"

I shuffled the cards---they're floppy now like pieces of fabric---and laid out a few. I just love this deck and they'll always be mine, mine! I love it!

 

[Pet Jeffery]

In the late 1970s or early 1980s, my then-spouse borrowed my cards to do readings at a charity event. I didn't feel comfortable about it, but didn't feel in a position to refuse. I couldn't bear to stay there and observe the readings.

"My cards", in this context, means the pack I'd designed and painted myself.

 

[Fianic]

Completely get how you feel, I don't let anyone touch my main deck. Just don't want it to get 'soiled' .

 

[VGimlet]

I've never thought about it before, but you know, it might bother me!

I don't mind people touching my cards, shuffling my cards, looking at my cards, but I find myself oddly reluctant about this. I didn't realize I had any possession issues with my decks.

Then again, I don't like loaning my books. Except to my sister. I guess it wouldn't bother me if SHE wanted to borrow a deck or three.

Interesting question though.

 

[Yineth]

While I've never had someone use my personal decks to conduct readings for others, I do remember a classmate warning me about how I shouldn't let others "touch" my deck in any way. His argument was if my deck was touched by someone else/used by another, I would have to immediately cleanse it with crystals and incense to relocate my energy with it. Mind you, this was during the time of when I didn't understand a drop of what Tarot was about, so I lapped up just about any information that came my way
Long story short, I didn't believe him in the long run and my Mystic Dreamer seems accepting of me enough

I do understand you would feel uncomfortable about another person using your personal deck and interpreting it in a different manner. I don't want to say it's an invasion of privacy of the owner, but it probably differed with how you may have imagined your deck's personal "voice" to be. Bottom line it's your deck. If it makes you uncomfortable, then just toss a lesser favorite at the grabby hands

 

[gregory]

Never thought about it before - but I am OK with people touching my decks (except people I have reservations about in general) - but how odd - I can only think of about three people I'd be OK to have READING with any of them....

I wonder why...

 

[Richard]

I don't let anyone mess with my cards. I'm just that way. It has nothing to do with the deck absorbing someone's vibes or any other spooky stuff. I'm the same way about certain other things which could possibly be damaged by mishandling.

 

[nisaba]

a good friend wanted to try giving a reading, and asked if he could use my cards. I didn't see any problem with it, so I handed them over, and watched him give the reading to another friend.
I was shocked when I felt -offended-... I was thinking "that's NOT what that card means!!!" as he explained them, and almost angry about it. Normally, I would find it interesting if someone else has different interpretations of a card than I do.. but when the deck was mine, but his ideas about the cards weren't, I felt like there was something disconnected and uncomfortable.

<comfortingly> He was working with his own mental symbolism, which was really all he could do. I used to feel like that, too - now if Tarotically inclined friends visit and pull out a deck I'm quite happy to accept or listen to their readings with only the slightest twinge.