Stopping a Tarot addiction (serious question)...ruined my life

[novenovembre]

Years ago it did happen to me, I made a decision that turned out to be disastrous, based on what not one, but more than one tarot reader had told me...I was very young back then, and I like to think that I learnt the lesson....from then on, every time I have to make an important decision, I ask myself : would I be doing/not doing this, if tarot hadn't suggested a good outcome ??
I still make huge mistakes, but I've come to think that maybe sometimes we also need failure to learn a lesson the hard way....

 

[The crowned one]

I have never had anything like that happen, I am very sorry for you!

I only use tarot to predict the future, I think it is next to useless as a "self help tool" compared to the tools available to us in the field of psychology, after all you need to know how we think, feel and behave from a less subjective view point to help people understand, explain and change their behaviours. Tarot does not do this in my experience. As I said; I use tarot to predict the future: fortune telling, I love doing it, I have a blast, but I rarely follow the cards advice, I know better then the cards when it comes to me.

You need to see about intervention therapy and a change of state program, there is a process people go through when thinking about, beginning, and trying to maintain new behavior. There are books that can give you templates, but really they are not one size fits all, and clinical counsel is what I would think best suit your needs.

Acknowledging the problem is a great start

 

[Padma]

Exactly...

I didn't know how else to phrase that, I'm on straight forward mode. I don't think this is a drug cartel forum. My opinion.

Which of course, you are quite entitled to, I am sorry if I was unclear. I withdraw my comment I misunderstood you entirely, my apologies. And ETA I think you are correct, this forum is not a cartel of any kind.

 

[ravenest]

Exactly...

I didn't know how else to phrase that, I'm on straight forward mode. I don't think this is a drug cartel forum. My opinion.

I am actually offended that we are referred to as such and if I owned or ran this forum I would be offended more.

Many times people have come to me with similar (but not as severe) issues and I have been able to help them from an inside, intelligent and compassionate perspective.

Actually, for the first time ever here I considered reporting that post as an insult .... and coming from ME ... that IS significant.

I have put up a few posts here about such readings .... the woman that lived in fear for years about her son's predicted death and a whole lot of other issues and problems started by some idiot with a deck of tarot cards in their hands and a glamour projected towards the susceptible.

Being a Thoth reader and a Thelemite and hence interested in helping others empower themselves I find this abuse of (perceived) power totally unacceptable and believe it is up to good and ethical (another subject I have posted on) tarot readers to help to address this balance.

CloudRain899; I hope you can sort this out and come to a balance. You know, living 1 day at a time or even moment to moment can have great benefits ; let go of anticipation (it causes stress you know ) everything will eventually unfold and the TRUE future will be revealed to you as it unfolds ... you actually HAVE a way of being certain about how things will turn out ... by observing.

Enjoy the wonder and mystery ... see the flower bud ... don't beat yourself up wondering what colour the flower is , don't try to unpeel it, that will damage it, just watch it every day and then one day you will see it. Relax, enjoy life and let your own flower unfold.

 

[ravenest]

I have never had anything like that happen, I am very sorry for you!

I only use tarot to predict the future, I think it is next to useless as a "self help tool"

Personally disagree in general

compared to the tools available to us in the field of psychology, after all you need to know how we think, feel and behave from a less subjective view point to help people understand, explain and change their behaviours. Tarot does not do this in my experience. As I said; I use tarot to predict the future: fortune telling, I love doing it, I have a blast, but I rarely follow the cards advice, I know better then the cards when it comes to me.

You need to see about intervention therapy and a change of state program, there is a process people go through when thinking about, beginning, and trying to maintain new behavior. There are books that can give you templates, but really they are not one size fits all, and clinical counsel is what I would think best suit your needs.

Acknowledging the problem is a great start

Personally totally agree in this specific case.

I have at times offered advice, after a reading and discussion, 'You need to seek professional help'

Wether it is as TCO outlines as above, or medical, or other. A reader needs to know their limits.

.... And certainly NOT intrude in those areas and MOST CERTAINLY NOT use others weakness in those areas to make money out of - evil

 

[Annabelle]

CloudRain899, it's my feeling that you need to seek professional medical help. Find a psychologist or counselor or even talk with your primary care doctor about what's going on and how you've been feeling.

In my opinion, seeking to learn more about tarot, or even using tarot cards at all is not a good thing for you right now. You need to learn how to think and feel and make decisions for yourself, based on your own judgement and insight.

I sincerely hope that you find the help you need, soon.

 

[CloudRain899]

thank you

wow thank you for all your replies, there is some really helpful advice. It's difficult to talk about/get support in real life because friends and family don't really understand, for me it's lik a gambling addiction. I have spoken to a therapist but she said tarot addiction isn't real and neither is gambling addiction, because it's emotional rather than physical (like drugs or smoking) it's easier to fix. So that is good news! )

I'm finding it really hard staying away from Tarot but have managed two whole days now and it doesnt feel like the end of the world! I dont know whether Ill be able to stay away completely but at the same time i think that may be the healthier thing to do. well i will definitely not be getting any more professional/paid for readings!!! maybe i will make a set of Tarot rules too. I have done it before but not stuck to it, but this time I hope would be different as I've lost so much. or maybe im just making excuses so i can avoid going cold turkey. I dont know. I guess at the end of the day you have to look at how helpful something is and what affect it's having on your life because no matter how much you love it or them, if it's more harmful than good then it's no good for you!

but thank you for all your replies. It is really helpful to have support from people who actually know the emotions, technicals of Tarot behind it x

 

[Holly doll]

wow thank you for all your replies, there is some really helpful advice. It's difficult to talk about/get support in real life because friends and family don't really understand, for me it's lik a gambling addiction. I have spoken to a therapist but she said tarot addiction isn't real and neither is gambling addiction, because it's emotional rather than physical (like drugs or smoking) it's easier to fix. So that is good news! )

I'm finding it really hard staying away from Tarot but have managed two whole days now and it doesnt feel like the end of the world! I dont know whether Ill be able to stay away completely but at the same time i think that may be the healthier thing to do. well i will definitely not be getting any more professional/paid for readings!!! maybe i will make a set of Tarot rules too. I have done it before but not stuck to it, but this time I hope would be different as I've lost so much. or maybe im just making excuses so i can avoid going cold turkey. I dont know. I guess at the end of the day you have to look at how helpful something is and what affect it's having on your life because no matter how much you love it or them, if it's more harmful than good then it's no good for you!

but thank you for all your replies. It is really helpful to have support from people who actually know the emotions, technicals of Tarot behind it x

Congratulations!!! That's great you've made it this far; take things a day at a time & some days will be better than others - but you'll get there! You've done two days already so have faith in yourself...

 

[VGimlet]

The problem is I still love the Tarot and believe in it, even though my relationship with it has ruined my life (I know it's not the cards fault, it's mine). I have installed website blockers for online readings, sold my decks and vowed myself not to get another professional reading or go anywhere near the Tarot again- unless something happens in real life that shows me that the past 8 months weren't a mistake, or the prediction really does come true later on!? (extremely unlikely).

If you are this addicted to tarot, my advice is to stay away from it.

I don't care what kind of real life message you get at some point that it was really
on track; even if things work out I think you need to learn to trust yourself, and notbase your life decisions on what a pack of cards say. I wouldn't say your life is ruined, but I would say you have learned some hard life lessons.

(Been there done that, not with tarot, but sometimes we have to learn the hard way, I think.)

Tarot can give us advice, and a heads up, and if I was making a major decision, I might consult the tarot, but I wouldn't necessarily follow the advice given. Sorry you are in this position, but just like being addicted to anything, you need to quit, cold turkey. Especially paying someone to read your cards, but maybe for now, quitting tarot all together may be for the best. Maybe even seeking counseling.

(((CloudRain99)) I hadn't read the end of the thread to see others had given the same advice as me. But wanted to add - congratulations on going forward, and quitting your addiction.

 

[JoyousGirl]

I think sometimes we want someone to tell us how things are going to be instead of taking the reins of our life and moving things in the direction we want them to go. Some things in life are destiny, most of them are free will. You've hopefully learnt this lesson well. The cards are like one of those multiple ended stories - you choose, nothing is set in stone.

Find another consuming interest, there's lots of groovy stuff out there. Find musicians you like and listen to all their stuff, teach yourself something new like how to draw, or maybe play with clay, or go to a library and find some books you can't put down.

When I need readings I will go to someone who is a renowned medium, someone who is recommended or well known for their gift, someone who does not need cards. They are generally much more expensive, but the advice is from those with a birds eye view. I may be put on a waiting list but it gives patience which is good and God knows when we need to know whatever he's allowing us to know, "the appointed time", and that sort of thing. The advice spans years - and I can see piece by piece what's happening. I know it is real advice and I know it is given with love.

I wouldn't jump off a bridge because someone told me I should - I'd do it because deep down inside I had spent time thinking about it and wanted to. (Not recommending that anyone jump off any bridges, just a point of view). You've learnt a hard lesson from a painful mistake. It happens to us all, but don't keep making the same mistake because you are the one making the choices, the one with the power.