Why Can't I Read for Myself?

[afrosaxon]

Now when you read for yourself it's completely different. You already have that picture in your mind, but it's rigid. It's like a jigsaw puzzle with a few pieces missing. You try and fit the tarot into the blank spaces, but it doesn't really fit. You don't want to change the picture too much, so you'll cut a few corners, effectively carving out just the answer you want. This defeats the purpose of the tarot entirely.

So it is that those who are able to read for themselves are those who are able to detach themselves from preconceptions.
-Acatalepsy

Good stuff, Acatalepsy!

I will add that the jigsaw puzzle analogy seems to especially apt when we are reading on romantic issues...

Yup, reading for oneself is difficult simply because we are SO invested in the outcome.

This is so true, particulary when tarot is saying "NO NO NO" but our hearts (or loins ) are saying "YES YES YES". Which is when you find people asking different readers the same questions, over and over, tarot and oracle, runes and skulls...until SOMEONE finally gives the message WE want to hear.

Oh, and did I mention refusing to give feedback and/or giving the "no, you're wrong" type of feedback when the reader is not going along with our self-delusion?

I see it all the time in the tarot Reading Exchange and the Oracles and Divination sections. Others do too.

Free your mind, and your behind will follow.

T.

 

[Clear Autumn]

A friend of mine has the same problem. She could do well with reading for other people, but she just couldn't read for herself. At first I thought she was being modest or using this as an excuse to make me read for her. After a while I figured out she did have the problem.

I'm not sure why someone can't read for themselves. I guess the reasons can be various. For instance, maybe one can have a bad day and simply won't be able to connect themselves to the deck; maybe they're not opening themselves enough to do the reading; maybe the question is not phrased well; maybe there's something they unconsciously don't want to know, etc. My suggestion is keep trying. Making changes when you do the self-reading and keep trying.

ps: why not ask someone else to do a reading for you to see what blocks you?

Just my 2 cents. ;P

 

[tarotberry]

ps: why not ask someone else to do a reading for you to see what blocks you?

Just my 2 cents. ;P

now THAT'S clever!

 

[Nevada]

Most of my readings are for myself, and I think they're my best readings. It's my favorite use of Tarot. But I mostly read for insight.

I think it has to do with the fact that you color your readings with your own hopes, fears, and knowledge of the situation. In a way, you out-think your intuition... or listen with biased ears.

It's my belief that reading for yourself improves when you're seeking insight, as opposed to some answer you want to hear. It takes practice and being honest with yourself and your personal truth.

I've been reading for a long time and the things I consult the cards about have changed over the years. I'm not looking for "answers" anymore. I'm looking for insight. And I generally don't ask for insight into things I feel desperate to know the answers to. There's a subtle difference between insight and answers, but in that difference is the answer to your question, I think.

This just about says everything I would.

I do sometimes do predictive readings for myself that are accurate, but only about things I'm not emotionally tied in knots over, and usually short term future, not long term. Will I get that package today? When will my car be ready at the shop? That sort of thing.

But most of what I do for myself is to gain insight. Why am I so unable to focus today? etc. What's behind this down mood of mine? Am I feeling grief I'm not aware of? In other words, getting in touch with my unconscious, which seems to store things up as I go through life and don't bother to stop and process my feelings about things.

I don't ever read for myself for anything but insight if I'm anxious, angry, hurt, sad, stressed, worried, or even elated about something. Those are "noisy" emotional situations, and forget being able to be intuitive about outcomes if that's where my head is. I'm better off taking a walk or doing housework than trying to read for myself then. Or maybe just having a good cry -- after which I may be calm enough to read for myself or at least meditate on the situation.

It's natural to be anxious about certain outcomes and wish we knew the future, but the reason we're anxious is usually the same reason we're not going to get a good read on the future. You know, intuitively, that things are still up in the air. That's why you're anxious. Someone hasn't made up their mind, or the dice haven't yet fallen on the matter. Or the answer is out there and you just don't want to see it. It's out of your control. Your reading of the cards is under your control, so you "fix" it to go your way.

Frankly I even think getting a reading from someone else isn't very predictive in that case -- at least it hasn't ever been for me, even though they might tell me exactly what I want to hear and that might help me be less anxious. But when I get the real-life answer, my stress level will likely shoot up and I'll want to argue with the outcome. "But the cards said . . ."

Just my opinion and what I recall of my experiences.

The most common reading I do for myself, nearly every day, is:

What do I most need to know right now?

It's usually informative, insightful, predictive, and accurate. There's no desired outcome in the way. I just read the cards. It's the best reading I do.

Nevada

 

[shotthebreeze]

ps: why not ask someone else to do a reading for you to see what blocks you?

Just my 2 cents. ;P

There's not enough cards in the deck, lol. Maybe I'll give that a whirl...

 

[All Is One]

Devilishly funny

Free your mind, and your behind will follow.

Oh, god, that is great!!!!

Can I just shamelessly steal that? ;~)


Oh, and Nevada, most of what you said applies to me as well...especially the last bit.

 

[Rosanne]

When I first read with tarot I never thought that I would read for myself. It was not what I thought reading the cards was about. I was not as proficient for myself as I second guessed all the time- or mentally discounted the cards.
I have found a way around this.
I only use one deck for myself- no other- ever!
It took quite a bit of thought to decide on which deck- that I would never use for anyone else.
Once I decided, I invested a lot of time into exploring the images as what they meant for me alone. This is, for me, quite a different process than if I was reading with them for someone else. History appeals to me, and so I chose a deck that I could wonder off in all sorts of directions for myself alone. For example I know someone who does what I do with the Secret Forest deck as that is the one that appeals to her. I chose the Visconti Gold.
It is freeing for myself and I keep on track with my question. I also used Mary Greer's book '21 ways to read a Tarot Card' to define the Visconti for myself.
This approach was so successful, that for family members that want a reading I only use one deck for them as well. Anyone else who wants a reading can choose from a variety of decks that I have not personalised to me or my family specifically. I also have decided on one spread only for myself which is five cards and I write the question down to keep it specific.
Maybe you could consider this approach?
~Rosanne

 

[Morwenna]

I can only read for myself if I have a specific question or if I'm using a full-out spread (3 cards just doesn't do it). Reason: I scare myself! One or two or three cards usually just gives me scary stuff because there's no context. No way am I going to pull single cards again!

Themed spreads, though, work well for me. Very often, though, they give me what I knew all along anyway...

 

[starrystarrynight]

This is so true, particulary when tarot is saying "NO NO NO" but our hearts (or loins ) are saying "YES YES YES". Which is when you find people asking different readers the same questions, over and over, tarot and oracle, runes and skulls...until SOMEONE finally gives the message WE want to hear.

Guilty, as charged...but usually it is MYSELF who continues to do readings ON MYSELF because I don't trust my own intuition about things as personal as relationship readings.

But, yes, we have all seen folks who continue to ask reader after reader until they hear what they want to hear...and that defeats the purpose, I think. This is a good point, T.

 

[All Is One]

Please Try To Learn To Read For Your Self

Maybe we need to listen to what we are hearing.

I learned doing readings for myself and quiclky began to read for others. It WAS more fun.

Being right...being given applause...is more fun.

But learning what the tarot meant...
that was something I had to do all alone, by myself...shut up, all alone in a huge house where I was renting a room. Studying meanings and positions and writing everything down. Then seeing that ...yes...this thing called tarot WORKS.

I learned to trust it as I have never trusted anything, until I grew 2 decades past that point. It was many many years later that my trust in tarot and my learning to trust my Self led me to trust another.

Sometimes, that we must have appear.

For me, it was tarot.

If you listen to the voices in your head...you will NEVER be the same.

Up to you.

If you can't read for yourself....I can't imagine why not.