Okay I felt a clash straight away,there is a restriction between moving and staying in your comfort zone, restless energy that wants to move but also the feeling of staying where you are because its safe. What do you really want to do, what do you desire? It feels like you feel its too far away from you for you to do anything about it, instead you stay put, the dreams you had seem like the are stifled, has someone told you (who is an older man or from your family) that you cant do what you want to and your silly to dream about it, just get on with things now rather then reaching out for something new?
a bit of a clash right now, yes, but nothing that is from a man in my life. the only man in my life really is my husband, and though he is not much of a believer in this divination business, he does support me in it and urges me to move forward with it. In fact, at times he pushes me harder then I am ready to move myself.
That said, there is a person who tells me that I am foolish, etc. I don't listen much to her anymore--as there has been a major upset in our relationship 2yrs. ago. I do not discuss my business w/this person anymore. but, the clash that did occur between us two years ago is still healing. its been a rough road for me, and a constant battle to get over it.
As for what do I really want to do? I'm torn. I keep being told that I am a healer, and yet, I don't know which avenue to take with healing. I am losing my psychic abilities lately, or perhaps they are just not strong, because I have been ill and I do know that when my body is fighting illnesses that are major, those abilities do tend to wane a bit. I do hope they come back full force for me, as I do not want to lose that and perhaps those abilities are the ones I want to develop to the point of helping/healing people with.
Change is very much on your mind, but your not sure how to do that, but you already know how to if you think about it properly. Open up the possibility is one of the things you need to do, also to be more open in what you wish to do, bring things into the open, stop hiding your talents. I don’t know what you want to do, but it seems you are passionate about it, and its something that will bring attention to you, which is perhaps why your not sure about doing it, there is a confidence issue which is stopping you moving forward. You seem to be surrounded by worries about lots of things, but one of them is worries about your own abilities.
yes, there are a lot of changes about to occur for us and I am somewhat excited about them as well as sad about them. (PM coming your way re: this) As a result I am somewhat unsure how to proceed as a result. A part of this is because I'm not sure exactly when one major change is going to happen, and everything has to revolve around this. I'm the kind of person who likes everything to be organized and so living in this chaos is a bit unnerving for me. it throws me off balance. I do have an idea of what I want to do, but I'm not 100% sure how to do it! I also have a lot of poor self image problems and lack confidence in myself, so yes, you are right. Also, there are a lot of worries on me right now and I feel I need to get those sorted out before I can truly proceed with these new ideas and one worry is regarding my psychic abilities waning. What 'IF' they are gone? What then? that is truly what I want to build my practice around. more so then tarot, I want that.
Do you have a fear of open spaces, or rather social events with lots of people? I feel there is some apprehension about having to go and mingle and sell yourself , home is more comfortable for you, and less stressful. Your worries seem to stem from your past, and this is stopping you changing direction, it might even be making you physically ill or cause you physical pain . your getting lots of encouraging messages from your guides but your not really believing those, but there is lots of support for you career wise from the universe.
How well do you think you do your job, how well do others tell you that you do your job? Do those compare favourably?
no, no fear of open spaces, or social events. I actually am very good with social events and lots of people. I'm a social butterfly over all. I do have a problem with 'selling' myself and my abilities however. I also am somewhat fearful of doing house parties, where I am told is where the money is--but it frightens me to go into someones home whom I do not know, to do readings. Besides, while I do want to make money, this is also not about the money for me--and I often do readings for a pittance or free of charge.
Yes, I do know the past is where my worries stem from. I am battling with that to get over my past, which wasn't all good and happy. easier said then done when you've been 'conditioned' a certain way for much of your life. and, yes, VERY, VERY GOOD RED!!, the worries and upsets I've had from my past and with the people in my life are making me very ill. physically ill and physical pain too. It has caused some MAJOR health issues for me, that are very real.
There is a sense that your stuck because of yourself, its like the phrase ‘paralysed by fear’, you are surrounded by fear of moving forward. It doesn’t mean your fearful in general life, but in this situation it feels very boxed in, but this is really of your own making, you have created your own worries, that don’t seem to be based on the reality of the situation. You created your worries because of how you were treated when younger, whatever you were told when you were younger still travels with you, its like your afraid to let your light shine.
exactly! you really hit the nail on the head. it all seems like it is so simple to just let it go and move forward, but it's not as easy as that. I am working at it and I will get to that point, I hope--at least I hope to before it kills me!
I am stuck and paralyzed by fear, and it is all because of how I was treated when I was younger. It sounds silly that I can still be stuck in that rut, as I am now an adult, in my 50s, but I will tell you that it is very difficult to break down those walls that one had built around them from the time they were young.
This feels like one of the easiest readings to work on, all you need to do is continue to work on yourself and take steps forward even if they are baby steps. Start moving pas the fears and you will see that nothing is really stopping you, that your fears are not going to manifest.I am not saying that doing it is easy, but conditioning is stopping you achieve your own goals, allowing yourself the freedom to see the possibilities as reality, and also spotting the signs around you that are leading you towards a big change.
yes, I do know this. Luckily, my hubby is so supportive now and he pushes me towards this goal. He has changed in his attitude somewhat about divination. he doesn't necessarily believe in it still, (always the engineer...), but he sees how it is for me and he has realized finally that it is something that I need. Especially now, I think.
Have you lost a man in your life recently? If so PM me about this.
Yes. PM coming.
Red, as usual, an EXCELLENT reading! thank you so very much!!!
