Asked To Look For Stuff That Is Just Not There

[balenciaga]

Hi All,
Last night I was involved in a discussion about card reading - specifically about when the sitter is looking for certain information and is annoyed when the reading does not answer the question, forget about the fact that they are not going to get what they want from "the future". I tried to explain that the cards just present what is "there", the energy that comes through; I cannot force the cards to engage on a specific subject the sitter so desperately wants to hear about. These sitters did not seem to "get" what I was talking about. They did not understand the reader's "dilemma". And there was just no getting through to them. I told them that I would refuse to be led down a "primrose path" just because they want specific answers. The result is disappointment all around. Mind you, we were not reading, just discussing the problem.
Suggestions?

 

[214red]

to be honest us readers sometimes are the same, we want to see something, but because we understand that we are shown what is needed , not what we want to hear.

people i have been reading for in person i tend to tell them straight off that this is not about what they want to hear, its what i am being shown to tell them. i also have foot in mouth diesease, it flies out of my mouth bypassing my brain...runs away from tact and diplomacy

 

[gregory]

Happens all the time - even in feedback here. Everyone wants to see what they want to hear.

That's one reason I don't read for myself - I can't trust me !!!

 

[balenciaga]

The sitter will say, "Who cares about x? I want to know about Y!, Y!, Y!, Y!, nothing but Y!
And then they say (in so many words) "oh, you don't know how to read cards, you are no good at it"

 

[LightTraveller]

If I get a spread that I just can't seem to relate to the question (reading for myself, but I don't see why it wouldn't work reading for someone else), I'll try coming up with all the ways in which it does NOT relate -- just to jump-start the thought and intuition processes. Often that's enough to work my way back around to where I can in fact get something affirmative out of the reading.

 

[Le Fanu]

I had this over the weekend in a few readings I did for friends that were over. One guy was asking about love and just kept getting cards which were not related to love at all. I understood what the cards were saying. There were no Cups, no Lovers, nothing that could be construed as relating to love. Just swords and logic and too much thinking, too much analysing and not enough true feeling. I knew what the cards were saying.

I ended up by doing a Lenormand spread, the "Grand Lenormand" spread, and guess which card was furthest away?

Yep, the heart...

He just couldnt understand why...

 

[LightTraveller]

Just swords and logic and too much thinking, too much analysing and not enough true feeling. I knew what the cards were saying.

Ha! I'm not even much of a reader (for others) and yet the meaning here is practically jumping off the screen and whacking me on the head!

 

[Nevada]

Most people are in denial about something -- readers and sitters alike. We don't think we have control over things we can control; we think we should have control over things we can't control, or shouldn't, and so forth. We mistake being lonely for being ready for love. We seek happiness out there somewhere, and in others' actions, when it's to be found inside us.

I think it's probably best for a reader to somehow get the message across to sitters that they're only the messenger, and to realize that themselves.

Nevada

 

[Disa]

So you guys feel ok about not answering the question the sitter asked?

I thought that was what I was striving to learn, how to relate the cards to the question they are asking.

Granted I understand that sometimes they don't like the answer because it isn't what they want to hear, but shouldn't they get an answer? I always feel like I'm letting them down if their question isn't answered.

 

[gregory]

Of course we all do our level best to answer the question asked - but what if the cards simply don't lead you there ? What do you do - just say "can't get anything, sorry, have your money back" ?

If I go to the doctor certain that I have one thing and he diagnoses another - I will go along with him (probably) - there is something of the same principle here.... If some of my symptoms don't fit his diagnosis, I would ask where they fit in the ultimate scheme of things and hope we could reach agreement on everything so that we both thought I would get better. This certainly applies with professional counsellors, who often have to lead us to face things we don't wish to see....