Saskia
I don't think I could ever see the card this way outside of it being rx. I mean, if that's how it always is for you, then that's how it is. But I've never seen it defined as being fatalistic and lacking control. Quite the opposite. Waite remarks that the Chariot: "...is conquest on all planes--in the mind, in science, in progress, in certain trials of initiation...He is above all things triumph in the mind."
Believe me, I've been baffled and annoyed when I learned tarot and noticed that the Chariot does not mean its "usual" meaning for me - nor for my sitters when I read for others! I guess it's a difference of view point, thought. For me the focus is on the forces that try to steer my life to a direction that's not what I want or like (not necessarily negative, just not what's desired).
So, some action needs to be taken to address these outside forces and work with them, not against them.
Either let go and let them steer or set the pace. It's not always a bad thing, sometimes it's liberating to NOT try to force your will on things - say, it's better to ride out a slowdown in economy than try to find a new job right now.
Or, deliberate action needs to be taken to overrule or sidestep these controlling forces.
It's not always possible to win the battle with force or willpower, hence I talked about "stepping out of the Chariot". I'm not being fatalistic, but rather, realistic. Life comes with situations that can't be changed outright (say, I may lose a job and can't find another for a period of time), but there can be another way, a side road, a more strategic approach to get to the destination than forcing it (say, through networking and setting up a number of small income streams instead of a full-time job).
I believe we talk about the same concept but from a slightly different angle.
ETA: to me the animals pulling the chariot represent the 'outside forces' and it's never possible to control animals/circumstances with my physical force. There needs to be an element of trust, cunning and ability to make the animals want to go where I want them to go, i.e. work with them, not against them - not forcing or whipping them. I think we just articulate control in a bit different terms, Thirteen.