Hi Suz,
I have been reading the comments in the sign-up thread. Hope this goes okay!!!
Picking an oracle for such a psychological spread is a challenge.
Okay: the Holitzka
I Ching cards.
1 - The ego
5 Waiting
The ego is how we define our place in the world, and is tied to both our mask that we need in daily life (we cannot be that exposed in every situation) and how we perceive ourselves.
In Chinese imagery the falling of rain is a long-awaited event, a release of tension. This is probably because of droughts which plague the interior of China with high mountains to the west which dry out the clouds.
This card shows that your ego has been rather fixed (like a mountain), and this is in your own defense. But, like a mountain it has prevented healing, nourishing rain from reaching the ground of your being. The rain in the background shows that a release from long held tension can come.
You have been a bit resistant to anything that would alter your sense of self, but like all egos, we hold some false imagery which we see in our inner mirrors.
The resistance has come because in order to be successful you have been forced to be a chameleon. But the toll is that you have hidden your inner self behind a strongly defended ego, and are thirsty there.
You have to look at how you nourish others and how they nourish you. What you give out and what you take in, and look for true value.
2 - How it helps you
18 Work on what has been spoiled
This hexagram is the one for focused determined effort. It is a fine draw for success through personal will and effort, both tied to a centred ego.
The image shows a person building a solid structure with the ruins of what came before scattered around. It is recognizing that however badly things went before (and this card is often tied to abuse of authority), that the work can be re-done and better than ever.
Think of it a bit like the 6 of wands riding triumphantly out of a reversed 10 of pentacles. It is triumph over the past and especially past failures, and your ego helps you here because it gives you inner strength.
Think back even further, too, as this card can also be tied to the evil that parents may visit on their children, in many forms. Again, your ego, like a mountain, helps you, holds you together. And, your ego, softly like tree roots penetrating rocks gradually wears them away.
3 - How it hinders you
53 Gradual Advance
Like a flinty path, it can cut your own feet. You can stumble over small rocks on your trail. It can make the world feel like winter, dark and cold with nothing growing and when you need to account for your whole life.
It can make you feel useless, not heard, like a breath of air easily brushed away.
An ego is defense, and can be helpful but when it darkens our internal mirror, trapped within its shifting lights ourselves, we ourselves fall prey to the very deceptions that we use against the world.
One thing with the I Ching, I never see anything as pure negative. It offers a way out of negatives.
Here the way out is gentle understanding, not being harsh or ruthless with yourself. When negative self-thoughts arise, you must follow them gently to their source. Depend on your inner and moral strength to help you see self-lies and guide you.
Do not try and find ways to defeat your ego, it is part of you and you need it. But neither must it dominate your whole self. Take things slowly and thoughtfully, thinking ahead and what you want to try to do. And this on every level from planting flowers to your highest aims.
Alta
Alta
