Two Faced Querant

[yakn]

Hello, everyone~

I would tell this person, and there have been many such people in my life, that this is not the type of Tarot work that I do.

A reading is a dignified and useful effort, and like all efforts we are free to choose it or to pass on it. By a similar reasoning, I don't cook meals for everyone, either. I never subject myself to any sort of foolishness in the work of Tarot. If someone is planning an unethical use of Tarot or does not respect me, or the process, there is simply no point in dealing with it. There are millions of people who want something for nothing and do not engage in respect. Why serve them? Let the respectful seekers come to you, and pass on the rest.

I often say to people, "I can understand why you might ask, but I would not be comfortable with that. I am a professional reader and if I am reading as a courtesy it has to feel right to me, too."

I really do not feel that any sort of explanation or justification is necessary.

What did your cards say about this?

You know as yet I have not even consulted my cards on this. It just left such a bad taste in my mouth. I will though and let you know. I don't think at this point I could be professional enough to give that kind of person a reading. However a reading for myself on maybe what is the driving force behind Madame X might be useful for me to avoid possible pitfalls in her area. Food for thought.


Thanks,
yakn

 

[Sphinxmoth]

The only pitfall to avoid is further prolonged contact with this woman, who,
as has already been suggested, sounds a tad unbalanced.

Ferol Humphrey gave some very good advice.

Her only driving force as pertains to you is that she overheard your
conversation and thrust herself on you in an aggressive and unpleasant
way. She picked you by chance and convenience. Don't let her proximity
continue to pressure you in any way, as I imagine she will take advantage
of that circumstance. No means no. I hope she can take a hint.

Let her go find someone else and pay them for a reading to look
for her "edge" (also has been suggested, and I sure believe that's
a possibility), if a reading she really wants.

I am sorry you had this experience that left such a bad taste in your mouth.
That's always icky.

 

[Umbrae]

There are folks in this world who regardless of what you’re into, are going to put you down, judge you, and essentially be mean. If it wasn’t Tarot, they’d have told you about the evils of macramé. (“Hemp fibres!”)

And then those same folks will want something for free.

Find a way to make money off those folks and your life will be a long and happy one.

 

[TenOfSwords]

Are you sure that she wasn't just fishing for you to help her with a guilty conscience?

To me it sounds a bit like she maybe wasn't trying to be abusive to you but just had to externalize her feeling of guilt. People are often pretty clumsy when they do that.

Sounds a bit like a 'Oh no! I can't have other people thinking that I'm into this thing so I just have to put it down to distance myself from it' kind of thing.

That of course doesn't mean it wasn't abusive, because it obviously was regardless of the actual motive behind it.

 

[Glass Owl]

Then wham like a complete turn around she says "My mother is completely against Tarot, she says it opens the door to other bad things".
My response was "Well everything on this earth is a gift from God, it is how we use it that makes it good or bad". Then as she is walking off she says "No, it is wrong, that is why Samuel wrote what he did in The Bible...but I really want to know what is happening between me and my ex-husband".

Sounds like to me that instead of a tarot reading about her ex she needs to examine her own personal views on religion and how they fit into her belief and moral structures. Plus, she may very well need to look at her relationship with her mother and how much she allows her mother to dicate or influence her actions and beliefs.

By asking for a tarot reading and yet, in the same breath saying how it violates her (her mother's) beliefs she has created a hypocritical situation for herself. This is a no-win situation for everyone involved, including you as her reader. Unfortunately, no matter what you were to tell her, she'd end up twisting it around to suit to her own interests and beliefs. And in the end, she'd more than likely use any insights you were to give her as a means to blame or attack you, tarot, and/or her ex --regardless of the outcome, whether it be positive or negative. The reading and her relationship with her ex would always be shaded by the fact that she consulted the "devil's" cards.

 

[ARudhra]

well I can sure understand that~

Hi Yakn,

I would not feel like giving her a professional reading either, I think I understand how you feel on that.

When I first read your post I felt strong on your behalf, but when these kinds of things happen they are wierd in the moment. I thought your answer to her was very well done, and I agree with it. I have said the same thing myself in the face of similar criticism.

I would have spent a fair amount of time going over it in my head. It is only on rare occasions that I simply walk away from those events without another thought. What I put a stop to is the negative interaction. Later, the wheels in my head tend to keep turning until I feel I understand it, and can put it to bed.

 

[Mordraenen]

Two faced querents

You know, that reminds me of my friend who works at a public school as a teacher. She also reads the cards, professionally, but doesn't mix the two. She makes no secret about being a Pagan and a Tarot expert, and so her co-workers all look down their noses at her, too.

They look down their noses at her until they have a problem. Then it's, "Oh, Michelle, do a reading for me? Please??"

That's the way it is. But this Madame X certainly sounds as though she should be consulting a therapist, instead of the cards, lol!

 

[yakn]

Thanks for all the feedback and support on this situation. I saw Madame X at work last night however she did not approach me again on the subject and I hope will not do it again. I think maybe she got the message just by my silence.
I did however consult my cards and on the subject of what if I gave this woman a reading(prob a lot of my own feelings spilled out into it since I had already made up my mind not to give the reading).
I only drew three cards and these are the cards in order that came out.
1. six of cups
2.Judgement
3.nine of wands

I am thinking the six of cups representing me and my gift of the reading
Judgement representing her attitude and response to the gift and then the nine of wands just meaning to stand my ground and being just a little battle weary hmmm. Kinda like not worthy of wasting my energy on the whole affair.



yakn

 

[SunChariot]

Are you sure that she wasn't just fishing for you to help her with a guilty conscience?

To me it sounds a bit like she maybe wasn't trying to be abusive to you but just had to externalize her feeling of guilt. People are often pretty clumsy when they do that.

Sounds a bit like a 'Oh no! I can't have other people thinking that I'm into this thing so I just have to put it down to distance myself from it' kind of thing.

That of course doesn't mean it wasn't abusive, because it obviously was regardless of the actual motive behind it.

That's my take on it too. It was rather tactless and thoughtless, but I don't think she meant it as a comment against you or to hurt you in any way. I think she just felt close enough to you that she could talk about her worries and she was brought up to believe there was something worrisome in it. It was just like she was thinking out loud. My guess is she just didn't think of how you might react or forgot whom she was talking to.

On the other hand I personally wouldn't read for someone who had a negative view about Tarot. I would tell her just that, that it is my personal policy not to read for those who have negative views on Tarot and therefor I cannot read for her.

Bar