Tarot Use - Permission

I have been told you should not do a reading on anyone without asking their permission and getting the OK. Are there rules around this? I ask because I want to do a reading on my friend's and her new boyfriend's relationship, to see if my intuition is right (He hit his last girlfriend.) Would doing it on an intangible like a "Relationship" keep me from getting into trouble karma-wise? This guy is really off to me, and I have only ever had that kind of sense with a person with one other, and he turned out to be psychotic. (I didn't like him even though he was nice to me and very knowledgable and normal, something in me could just see through him.)

The tarot deck I will use if I can find a way around this issue is "The Clow" because I am most familiar with them and can easily interpret what it is trying to tell me. What spreads would you suggest? Past, Present, and Future?

I'm sure you'll get answers that cover the spectrum. Generally, I would say that I wouldn't read for a friend's relationship with another person unless the friend asked me to because it amounts to snooping. In this case I assume you're worried about the welfare of your friend. And it's pretty common for people in abusive relationships to hide/deny the abuse. In that particular case, if I thought a friend of mine were in an abusive relationship, I would relax my own rules about reading for people without their consent.

I still would probably rephrase the question from something akin to "Is A in an abusive relationship?" to something like "What I can do to help/be supportive of A at this point in their life?"

Rodney

It seems like you've already made up your mind about him, so what good would a reading do anyway? When it comes to abuse, I wouldn't rely on cards to safeguard your friend. Keep you eyes open for actions, not interpretations.

What one reads on up to the reader--there are no hard nor fast 'rules' on subject. If anything, the intent matters most. Or consider offering the gift of a reading first since depending on the subject, some folks would be offended (or see other factors other than the altruistic possibly at work).

Recommend avoiding Yes/No type of questions because the results tend to be too ambiguous.

How the question asked also matters. A question such as "What does A need to know about B" would be more helpful in order to elicit the more descriptive & informative.

Lastly: keep the spread small--more cards not necessarily more informative because less cards can be the more succinct. In fact, a lot of information can be gleaned from only one card. A 3-Card could be a Past-Present-Future; Body-Mind-Spirit; Feelings-Thoughts-Intent. I would go for the last.

Since you have a "funny feeling" about this guy, you could ask about what you are picking up on, about your sense of him...."what do I need to know about this person?" "what am I seeing clearly?" "What am I mistaken about/interpreting incorrectly?"

Well, I have been in your shoes not very long ago so it feels as a relief that I now can come with MY newly gained insights about this!

First of all, this is really a thing of personal matter! If this is a problem to you right now it would much likely get even more so troublesome down the road. What IF you were right with your insights? Would you tell your freind and then you need to tell her about your reading right? What would she think then? I know I would not be happy if I heard one of my friends have done so, even if they acted in the best interest of me! And what if the cards show you that he have changed and he his now an angel and an improved man? Would you then ignore the cards or say they are wrong? Because it sounds to me that you have allready made up your mind about this guy....

HOWEVER, if you insists on doing this what you could do is to do a reading focused on yourself: "What do I need to know about this man?" or similar. Hence you are back to "need to know bases" and the cards will tell you what you need .

Debra said:

Since you have a "funny feeling" about this guy, you could ask about what you are picking up on, about your sense of him...."what do I need to know about this person?" "what am I seeing clearly?" "What am I mistaken about/interpreting incorrectly?"

Click to expand...

It isn't that I automatically made up my mind. In fact, he made a good "FIRST" impression on me. But the lasting impression was when my friend gave the disclaimer that he hit his old girlfriend and was alright with it because she was apparently "Crazy". It was the most one-sided story I had ever heard. I don't think he hits my friend because they just got together, but he has this sickening energy to him, and it is my business because he is super super super nosey, and he won't let my friend out of his sight. She can never hang out with me without him there and he invites himself to everything and I don't like being around his energy. In a way their relationship does impact me because it changes my environment negatively.

How about if I ask "What do I need to know about "Name"?'' or "How will "Name" impact my life and relationship with my friend?"

Yes. That makes sense.

Everything you say about this man sounds like a warning against him. Be careful!

The trouble with karma is that you actually have to believe you're doing something wrong for it to affect you negatively (that is, if you don't feel wrong, you assume any bad that comes to you is not a punishment). At least, that's how it's always been for me (in fact, I think karma is more about universal balance, not reward and punishment). Personally (and I hesitate to say this, because a lot of people believe firmly in staying out of other people's business), if I feel I need to know something, then damnit I need to know. Other people's business aside--what about MY business? This is your friend. If you're nervous about her welfare on any level, and that nervousness drives you to want to do a reading, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. If you're wrong about him, at least your intentions were good, right? If I was in that situation, I'd do it.

My friend asked me to do a reading on her daughter's boyfriend. I told her that it wasn't the right way to go but I offered to do a reading on how their relationship would evolve in Canada which I thought was less offensive and a normal sort of reading to do. There was nothing untoward in it at all and it fact it ended up a really nice reading with progression toward a very good outcome.

I think the difference was that the original question was not positive at all while my reading allowed the positive to come out.

If I were going to do an awful reading it would be private for me and even then I would think a long time about it before whether I would do it or not.
Also it can be incorrect and you have to remember that. Readers are not infallible with their intepretations and many times I have not taken into consideration long enough the connection between the cards and... you can never get it all... at least I can't.