Will I be struck down?

I know that ethics is an oft heated topic that is discussed in relation to other subjects in different threads but I have sparked an interest purely in the 'Ethics of Tarot' in general.

Recent teachings discussed ethics to a certain degree. My teacher was very black and white about what you 'should and shouldn't do'.

Is it ok to do a reading about your ex-lover's new relationship without their knowledge or consent?

Is it ok to do a reading on your forever-trying boss's private life to try and workout why they are being so difficult towards you?

What 'can' or 'can't' you read on? Is there a statute of limitations in terms of time or distance of the issue to you personally?

I realise that alot of this is opinion only but I would like to see what the opinions, knowledge and experience of others are before I set my own values.

goddessof1967 said:

Is it ok to do a reading about your ex-lover's new relationship without their knowledge or consent?

Is it ok to do a reading on your forever-trying boss's private life to try and workout why they are being so difficult towards you?

Click to expand...

I'd think it was perfectly OK to do readings like those, provided that both parties concerned remain unaware that you're doing it.

It's perfectly normal human curiousity to find out stuff like that, especially if the implications of what you may discover are likely to affect you. For example, you'd be better prepared to react appropriately when your ex either announces their forthcoming marriage, or ends up on your doorstep begging to take you back; and you'd be better positioned to ride the storm in your office if you know why your boss is upset. Of course, these are just generalisations, but I'm sure you get the picture. As long as it's discreet, I can't see what's wrong...

These tend to be normal questions; however, if the questions are *obsessive* or asked with *ill will* in mind I no longer answer them. I take into account the degree of what's being asked (how deeply do they want me to delve -- superficial or deep) and the benefit of the answer (the immediate usefulness to the querant's well-being).

For me it's subjective.

At a psychic fair I read at, I have signed an agreement saying I *won't* look at third party questions and only deal with what's between the querant and the other party. Occaisonally there is still grey area there.

With warmth,

Abella

Two of Cups said:

I'd think it was perfectly OK to do readings like those, provided that both parties concerned remain unaware that you're doing it.

Click to expand...

I have to respectfully disagree. . . any decision to do an "other" reading you make should be, IMO, tempered with a conscious decision about how close to the subject you are. . . Unless you are the type who would go sit under the ex-lover's window to try and determine the status of his/her new relationship, then tarot shouldn't be an avenue for attempting to spy either. The question needs to be more about you than the unsuspecting other party - unless the reading is with his/her knowledge - and you're willing to share the results.

Two of Cups said:

I'd think it was perfectly OK to do readings like those, provided that both parties concerned remain unaware that you're doing it.

It's perfectly normal human curiousity to find out stuff like that, especially if the implications of what you may discover are likely to affect you. For example, you'd be better prepared to react appropriately when your ex either announces their forthcoming marriage, or ends up on your doorstep begging to take you back; and you'd be better positioned to ride the storm in your office if you know why your boss is upset. Of course, these are just generalisations, but I'm sure you get the picture. As long as it's discreet, I can't see what's wrong...

Click to expand...

I agree.

Hi goddessof1967,

For me, the way I answered my own questions about ethics (essentially, where I draw the line) was by asking myself how far I'd go without Tarot. If I wouldn't use another method to find out the same answers, then I know that I probably shouldn't use Tarot in that situation.

Having said that, sometimes Tarot (IMO) shouldn't be used simply because you would use other methods - and should. This is because I believe that nothing beats good old fashioned, face-to-face, honest communication with other people.

Kiama

Recently I got into an argument about me reading the cards with someone in mind. The other person did not agree at all with me doing that. It was like spying she said.

After some thought I decided to disagree with that.
It is indeed hów you read the cards. Reading them with a general image of the person in question is fine. Provided it is done with good intentions.

Take every day life. Looking deep into someone's eyes because you suspect something is wrong is ok, isn't it? More so. If called upon it is considered caring and affectionate.

Well then...

Hi Goddess,
You definately raise an interesting point. I agree with others that trying to find insight into these situations is indeed a very natural curiousity on our part. Especially so, when the situation or person affects our lives in such a close manner, as in the case of an ex-lover and the emotional ties that leaves us with. A person who is difficult to work with, and is senior to yourself. can cause even more stress in a job such as nursing, which can be stressful enough dealing with patients, families, and social situations.

I completely understand the desire to know. But personally, I could not see it as ethical to pose the specific questions in your post. For the simple reason that it was none of my business, essentially a breach of privacy. I do not believe it would be ok if the person was not told. In fact it would seem all the more deceitful in my eyes. If I were to gain knowledge in such a way, the act may quench my curiousity, but being privy to certain knowledge would come back to me threefold. If you were to ask such questions, the cards may decide not to answer or then again they might, and then you have made the choice to read them and take that knowledge. I hope this does not seem too harsh it is just my opinion.

All is not lost though, because on the flip side I would feel it was perfectly reasonable and practical for you to rephrase the questions. Basically in these situations you could know all you need to know without crossing the line by asking about the ex-lover "What do i need to know about OUR relationship?, Is there one? How do I perceive it? What might I expect? What is hidden and I need to understand?" etc... Maybe not these particular questions but something along those lines and of course use a good relationship spread.( Check out the spreads forum.) As for your boss, I believe by doing a similar spread and tweaking it a little for the professional relationship, you could get valuable insight in how to approach this person in the future to make your working relationship better. With such an approach you are looking at specifically how YOU connect with these people and one that I believe is ethical and answers your questions. If you still want to know more, then you are being a bit nosey and crossing that ethical line.

Peace,
Gypsy Mama

Gypsy Mama, I agree. Rephrasing questions is, in my opinion, a very good method to *avoid* ethical issues.

Personally, I would feel uncomfortable about reading for an ex-lover without their consent. It's personal choice I suppose, and this has been discussed here before. I think there are some situations where reading without consent is OK.

Sue