Will I be struck down?

[Dwaas]

I think reading without specific permission about other people is fine. I do it all the time. People who I know, but also moviestars and even for my dogs and rabbit. And I never asked my pets. Of course I don't want to be nosy, just curious how they are really doing, for practising reading cards, or just for fun. I also would not mind if other people read cards about me.

The matter is maybe about: are our thoughts free? And then my answer is yes. Nobody can look into my thoughts, feelings and insights in people and matters. I am allowed to think whatever I want. Reading tarot cards is imho a concentration of what I already know but am not aware of conciously, which is pointed out in the images. Therefor I see no difference in FOR EXAMPLE fantasizing what life Helvetica may have or laying cards about that question. Of course I don't lay cards about that because my ethics demand my attention for other matters. But that is not relevant for what I try to say. I believe there is complete freedom in what we ask the cards about whatever subject.

The ethics which may be relevant have to do with fulfillment in our own lifes. And when we have this fulfillment we don't want to nose around in other peoples lives, especially not on specific matters which are definitely not our business.

Blessings

 

[Gregglobe]

I couldn't say it better!

I have to respectfully disagree. . . any decision to do an "other" reading you make should be, IMO, tempered with a conscious decision about how close to the subject you are. . . Unless you are the type who would go sit under the ex-lover's window to try and determine the status of his/her new relationship, then tarot shouldn't be an avenue for attempting to spy either. The question needs to be more about you than the unsuspecting other party - unless the reading is with his/her knowledge - and you're willing to share the results.

You are right on the mark!

And there are a lot of people out there, I'm sort of knew, who misused tarot.

I follow the school that the tarot should be used as a divination. To use it as a misuse open the person up to his or her ignorance to the laws of karma, the non motivation to learn something about the universe, as well as, say, what's studied in kabala, or the tree of life, the ruach of the human being. Amazing how some of us want some spiritual insights while not trying to get to our spiritual self. And many times not even making an attempt. There are those out there who doesn't just reveal their hand-they just unveil themselves recklessly.

Altering demeanor, the question was asked. There is no such thing as a stupid question in metaphysics or the occult to me. The fool must learn or be walked on.

 

[noby]

I don't think it's a matter of "ethics" in the sense that it's "wrong" to ask questions about somebody else and use tarot to work with those questions. We're all curious about what everybody else is thinking. People are usually so guarded, it's hard to fathom what their inner lives are really like. It's tempting to want to use something like the tarot to try to get at that which is normally not revealed.

The main problem I have with asking questions about others is that I don't see that anything good or useful is ever going to come of it. If we take the supposition that we can actually see into another's inner world with tarot as correct, what can we do with that? Why are we asking the question? Usually it's because we want to see if something we want that is related to that person is possible, such as asking whether a love interest is attracted to us so we can know whether or not we can ask them out without being rejected.

The problem is that in the move from what is read about the other person to our future actions, it is almost impossible for some degree of distortion not to come in. We make the wrong conclusions, usually based on what we want to believe or to have happen. Why take a route which introduces all of this distortion when it would be so much easier to ask different questions? Rather than ask, "Does he like me?" why not ask, "Would a relationship between us work out?" and "What can I do to facilitate a relationship occurring between us?"

I think the more fruitful questions are those which get at the heart of why we want to know about another person's inner life in the first place. If we're worried about another person, why not ask, "Is there anything I can do to help them out?" rather than, "Are they OK?" If we suspect someone of talking about us behind our back, why not ask, "Should I confront this person?" rather than asking "Is this person gossiping about me?"

Passively gathering some information about others which may or may not be true doesn't seem to be a worthy pursuit to me. All I can see coming from that is us stroking our ego, feeling superior, or having ammunition with which to try to manipulate people. We don't want to deal with the stress and work of taking on issues directly and actively, so we try to sneak in the back door. Which only ends up being to our detriment.

The ego is a subtle and nefarious enemy. It will distort anything we do. And I think asking questions about other people is a very easy door which allows ego-distortion to come creeping in. So to me, it's not a matter of asking questions about other people being "rude" and something we should feel guilty about, but rather, being something which offers little value, as it likely introduces more distortion than clarity.

 

[Dwaas]

I forgot to say that I also believe that if we ask the tarot questions which are "nosy" and none of our business, our conciousness will know this and translate only nonsense answers. There is imo no use for asking questions which are out of the line because it will give you what you deserve: nothing.
Blessings

 

[sharpchick]

I looked at the sample questions asked when I posted my response.

Is it ok to do a reading about your ex-lover's new relationship without their knowledge or consent?

Is it ok to do a reading on your forever-trying boss's private life to try and workout why they are being so difficult towards you?

I see question #1 as a "nunya" kind of question ("nunya" = none of your business), and a not even veiled attempt to spy. What has the ex's new relationship got to do with the seeker, if the seeker is not one of the people in the relationship? A better question would be, "Why am I still obsessed with my ex?" or "What can I do to get over my most recent relationship?"

The second question is more directly dealt with by being. . . well, direct. Ask the boss or the tarot the question. . ."what can I do to help improve our professional relationship?" Why do you need to know about your boss's personal life?

 

[Gregglobe]

I looked at the sample questions asked when I posted my response.



I see question #1 as a "nunya" kind of question ("nunya" = none of your business), and a not even veiled attempt to spy. What has the ex's new relationship got to do with the seeker, if the seeker is not one of the people in the relationship? A better question would be, "Why am I still obsessed with my ex?" or "What can I do to get over my most recent relationship?"

The second question is more directly dealt with by being. . . well, direct. Ask the boss or the tarot the question. . ."what can I do to help improve our professional relationship?" Why do you need to know about your boss's personal life?

WEll here's a "question in a question:" what kind of spread/s could be used to inquire to ask the tarot such questions-especially those "obsessed" ones or getting over the relationship or feeling like a mountain fell on top of one? I think you're on the right track inquiring with the tarot as such in keeping the concern on the querent-instead of trying to use the tarot as a "private eye." (there are those out there, who practice white magic, that are known, if one pays them, to send a "spy" out there) (and these people do not want the laws of the concerned party's karma to bounce back on them!) I also think that Dwass made a good point, too.

 

[Lady Maria]

I forgot to say that I also believe that if we ask the tarot questions which are "nosy" and none of our business, our conciousness will know this and translate only nonsense answers. There is imo no use for asking questions which are out of the line because it will give you what you deserve: nothing.
Blessings

I completely agree.

 

[sharpchick]

WEll here's a "question in a question:" what kind of spread/s could be used to inquire to ask the tarot such questions-especially those "obsessed" ones or getting over the relationship or feeling like a mountain fell on top of one?

I think the Pyramid of Consciousness spread might be helpful with "obsession" questions. Very often, what we think we are obsessed with isn't what actually is driving the train, and that spread would be a good one to illuminate hidden issues.

...1...
.2...3.
4..5..6

1) The core issue
2) Past
3) Present
4) What's hidden?
5) What must change?
6) Final outcome

Or the Crossroads Spread:

.......1.....2.......
.......3.....4.......

1) What holds or binds me? (What I can't see)
2) What's offered in the moment? (What I can see)
3) What will result if nothing changes?
4) A new path, a different road, new opportunity

 

[goddessof1967]

Ahhh very sharp Sharpchick . I like the look and the sound of that. You're absolutely right that obsession over a lover can be an issue deeply rooted in a completely unrelated space (or so we conciously think).

Thankyou for that. And of course it can be used for many situations. Not just the obsession over the ex-lover.

 

[Psychebleu]

I don't think you'll be struck down.

My ethical stance is a practical one. My criteria is this: Is the information that can be gained useful to the querent? If it is, then I will read for it. If not, don't waste my time.

To be perfectly honest, I think a lot of readers (especially newer ones without a lot of experience) won't give this kind of reading for fear of being wrong, and maybe even told so later on, or not wanting to put themselves in that space - you know, not wanting to 'get involved'. They say, "No, he's not cheating. He loves you." Later the querent calls the reader up pissed off because the BF got the other girl pregnant, and she's being harassed by the Baby's Mama. Or, the reader says, "Oh my, he's being unfaithful." The gal breaks up with him, throws all his stuff out in the middle of the night. She finds out later from a mutual friend the guy is suicidal and in counseling trying to figure out why the love of his life - to whom he has been faithful and was going to propose - dumped him. OR, he is and the querent breaks it off and tells the BF she found out from a reader - next thing you know he's breaking out your windows for sticking your nose where it didn't belong and 'ruining' his relationship. (Yes, it's a exaggeration - but so is the implication that someone who would read for or ask such a question would just as well stalk someone.)

I'm not saying this is the reason for everyone who says they won't read for such questions - it could well be an issue of personal ethics. However I'd assume these people would not read about situations such as celebrity lives (relationships, pregnancies, career moves, etc) - yes they are public personas but if everything about their lives were public (or meant to be), why would anyone ever feel the need to do a reading? Or events - natural or organized - that have nothing to do with the reader or querent - unless he/she planned to act on info gained. Are you going to tell or warn people involved or possibly affected of your findings? If not, sorry to break it to you - you're just being noisy. Okay, that was harsh - you might just want the practice, at prediction for instance. Yet, in regards to the supposed ethical reasoning - it isn't 'right'.

My point is, every situation is different. So using the initial questions as examples - would I read for someone about the ex's new relationship? Depends on other matters - is the querent receiving mixed messages - does it seem as if the ex wants to get back together? If so, yes, I would. Yes, it would make more sense to come out and ask the ex - but the person has not, they asked you. I don't judge the querent or try to figure out their motivations before I agree to help - perhaps they aren't ready - haven't figured out how to approach the ex about it, are afraid of rejection, or any number of reasons. If the ex has made it clear that is over between you, or even worse - has had no contact with you at all after having made that clear - then no, because I would be disgusted with such a useless question. Also, I agree with what others have mentioned - you ask a silly question, you get a silly answer. See, in one situation you can act on information given, in the other it is of absolutely no use or consequence to you.

The boss? Realistically, especially if the relationship has been strained - not many employees will go straight to the boss and ask, "What's up? Why are you being a jerk?" (I might, but I get along with my boss quite well - I even read his tarot ) I would read, but the way the question has been worded does seem a little odd to me, and too narrow. I'd rephrase and read for, "Why is my boss behaving this way toward me?" It might not be her personal life - it could be you! You just might be working her last nerve, you might have replaced someone she really liked and worked with for some years and she doesn't know how to handle that, etc. If you are asking about her personal life, that isn't clearly about your working relationship, and again, probably not all that helpful.

That's my take.