10 of Cups as a negative card??

[Leviosa]

Did a 3 card draw reading and the question was "what are the factors blocking this relationship from growing?"

I drew 10 of cups in no particular position and I am so stuck! I'm thinking maybe it means that the 10 of cups is an illusion; an unrealistically perfect situation and once the person I am asking about lets go of this idea of perfection, the real work can begin. I think the person I am asking about may be thinking that if it's not going to be a 10/10 situation if we try to work things out, then what's the point in even trying? In other words, doubt and insecurity is in the way.

What are your thoughts?

 

[celticnoodle]

I was just about to sign off and head to bed, when I saw this post, so opened it to read. I have actually seen this card to also be one of smothering. I can see it as you described it too though. But, yeah, sometimes the 10 of cups which is generally thought of as "a happy home" can look good on the outside but inside those four walls be very different. Hope this helps.

 

[Tiggy-cat]

I'm a bit suspicious of the "happily ever after" 10 of Cups, and I wonder if it's saying that someone is stuck on an unrealistic or impossible fantasy?

 

[Absynthe]

I've seen the 10 cups come up to just mean overwhelming emotion, although not necessarily of the blissful variety. It can sometimes be a counter of a sorts saying, on the scale of 1-10 here, this person's got some serious feels going on. You could then pull another card to ask what the nature of those emotions are.

 

[Hitch]

He has a family with someone else (hence the back is turned)?
He's glad to say bon voyage to this relationship, because he his emotions are tied up with the idea of having a family with someone else?
He's so not into you, he's waving goodbe to you with his back turned?
It's a dream. It's a painting. It's an illusion. It's not real. It coulda been. But it aint'.

LOL. I'm just spit-balling.

 

[AprilShowers]

Stifling, stale, humdrum, routine....? Family life is great for security and feeling nurtured and loved, but every now and then it can feel too much, and you need time alone.

Sometimes you get everything you wanted and you're still not happy. Not quite discontented nor contented; somewhere in the middle. Let's be honest, it a long spectrum.



When the sky is cloudy you come along with your pretty little song

 

[Farzon]

I think it shows a mania about a harmonious relationship. Everything's great, nothing is wrong. But there's always something wrong, isn't it? There is no perfect relationship.

Your question was, what is blocking your relationship from growing. It's drowning every sense of conflict in super-cheesy happiness. You should look at conflicts and differences to make your relationship grow. Maybe each of you would need a bit of distance as well, feeling more like an individual than just a part of a couple.

All these come from the assumption that you ARE in a relationship. If it's just a possible relationship you would have to adjust the meanings accordingly, but the core message stays the same. Don't expect perfect happiness, it can be suffocating.

Also, consider a double check and ask what the relationship needs to grow. It will shed additional light on this card as well.

 

[Grizabella]

I was just about to sign off and head to bed, when I saw this post, so opened it to read. I have actually seen this card to also be one of smothering. I can see it as you described it too though. But, yeah, sometimes the 10 of cups which is generally thought of as "a happy home" can look good on the outside but inside those four walls be very different. Hope this helps.

Tens are endings of the numerical cards in the suit, too, so a 10 of Cups can be the ending of a relationship because it's progressed as far as it can go.

I think when we're learning, (I know it was true for me) there was the "your wish is granted" card in the 9 of Cups, the "happily ever after card", the 10 of Cups, the "soulmate" card in the Lovers, the "twin flame" combination of the Lovers along with the 2 of Cups, the "oh god, I'm gonna die" in the Death card, the "oh heaven'y diety I'm gonna go to hell" in the Devil etc. but as I learned more, I found richer meanings in the cards and could read them better and see patterns and combinations blending, etc.

 

[spookyboo22]

Did a 3 card draw reading and the question was "what are the factors blocking this relationship from growing?"

I drew 10 of cups in no particular position and I am so stuck! I'm thinking maybe it means that the 10 of cups is an illusion; an unrealistically perfect situation and once the person I am asking about lets go of this idea of perfection, the real work can begin. I think the person I am asking about may be thinking that if it's not going to be a 10/10 situation if we try to work things out, then what's the point in even trying? In other words, doubt and insecurity is in the way.

What are your thoughts?

As a blockage i would think it meant that one or both parties don't want long term commitment

 

[nisaba]

I'm a bit suspicious of the "happily ever after" 10 of Cups, and I wonder if it's saying that someone is stuck on an unrealistic or impossible fantasy?

I come close to this. I *never* see this as an unalloyed happy card. It always seems too good to be true, as if people who might have quite ordinary levels of happiness/unhappiness, are ramping it up for everyone else to look at and admire. Is the querent deceiving themselves about how happy they are, and turning a blind eye to problems in the situation? Did the situation start off for show, or out of more simple expectations, then got built up into the big theatrical happy-thing along the way?

And my thinking forever got changed as well, when I got my copy of the Herbal Tarot. This card is marijuana. Most potheads are happy-while-stoned, yes, but do they *do* anything? do they contribute to the world or to other people's happiness? No, they dream big dreams about what they might (or might not) do next, and get the munchies. And get anxious if they don't have money for the next bag o'green.

Yes, I'm generalising and stereotyping, but it's a sad fact that the stereotype is actually true for a large number of users of marijuana. Having had misgivings about the happiness of the Ten Cups for decades before ever seeing that image, when I finally saw it I thought "Yes,", and how I'd always felt about the card suddenly made sense.