...but three is too many!

[celticnoodle]

miss_yuko, you can offer to do a reading w/o even having her present. just ask her to think about what it is she wants you to read for her, or if you want, she can tell you outright. you can pretend that you are quite busy, (when she wants the reading), or something, and don't have the time to do the reading, or if she & her s.o. are with you, you are just not 'in the right mood' to do a reading at that time.

that way, you don't have to read w/him beside her, and you don't have to offend her either. you can do the reading she so badly wants, and write it all out for her and hand it to her. she'll have everything down on paper, (keep a copy for yourself too), and you can both refer to it in the future---incl. the s.o. if he wants.

i do most of my readings while alone, and i still have a lot of accuracy in them---as much as when i do the readings in person.

good luck!

 

[MeeWah]

miss_yuko: No offense, but your frazzled "I CAN'T WORK THIS WAY" resonates so clearly it made me laugh.

Since I do not rely on only the cards for information, I prefer the one-on-one, totally private between client & me. For not only the focus & the minimal distractions, but in the event something not for another's ears occurs (which has happened). Also, to avoid picking up on the wrong person or blurring the reading (also happened, where the other person 'louder'). For a minor client whose parent desires to be present that is something else, but not had that happen yet.

I have, however, read at psychic faires, parties, bridal showers, & other group situations. Then a matter of refining the focus & blocking out the extraneous. Can be done with practice. Wherever possible though, best to request a private area away from the crowd.

I see the situation to mainly be about sensing that boyfriend's disapproval & lack of respect, but strongly suspect other traits detected of concern which may not easily lend themselves to a reading in his presence. That those could possibly affect your confidence & worse, to almost force one to skewer the reading results if he present.

Whatever decided, do it with your head held up high, & let not the likes of him intimidate. Ground & center beforehand, & focus on providing that needed.

& most of all, remember: *ye the reader*.

 

[Stacie Doll]

good luck

If she knows that he has such negative view of tarot she should understand you not wanting him there. I don't even get why she wants him there unless she is trying to prove tarot to him.

 

[MareSaturni]

It's tough...you don't want to hurt her feelings...but what about your feelings? Friendship is a two way relationship...she really could be a bit more considerate...she had to of picked up on some of the uncomfy vibes at some point. Maybe just go with the flow and see if she even mentions it again...

Overall, it's not very nice or polite of her to insist he be at her side if she knows it makes you uncomfy.

Yeah...she used to be also my 'ritual' parnet, since she is the only other pagan around me i really trust and like (and ritual require one to be comfortable with the other). But since she found this guy, we are never alone. and it's not his fault: she's madly in love with him, so she wants him around all the time.

I guess sometimes i miss her friend, but i must respect what makes her happy.

They are so in love i don't think they could pick up any vibes that didn't come from themselves. My vibes were totally ignored

I see the situation to mainly be about sensing that boyfriend's disapproval & lack of respect, but strongly suspect other traits detected of concern which may not easily lend themselves to a reading in his presence. That those could possibly affect your confidence & worse, to almost force one to skewer the reading results if he present.

Whatever decided, do it with your head held up high, & let not the likes of him intimidate. Ground & center beforehand, & focus on providing that needed.

Hum...yeah. You're right. As i said, he's an evil guy...he's a nice guy, polite and all. But i can't concentrate with him around, because i clearly 'feel' he's not taking me seriously or he's just waiting for me to embarass myself...maybe it's his scrutiny combined with my own lack of confidence.

If a 10/Swords shows up someday i don't know what'll tell them.

If she knows that he has such negative view of tarot she should understand you not wanting him there. I don't even get why she wants him there unless she is trying to prove tarot to him.

The thing is that...she doesn't. I don't have any reason to feel uncomfortable with him around, he hasn't done anything bad to me. He's a good guy, but not helpful when i'm reading (or trying to read) tarot.

It could be possible she wanted to prove him tarot - she too read cards, but she uses the Lenormand deck. But i also think she wants him around because she wants him around ALL TIME POSSIBLE. Specially during the weekends (which is the only free time both of us have to meet).


~YUKO

 

[princessofpelaw]

I think your friends boyfriend seems to be a bit curious of the tarot, otherwise he would say to her to go alone, as you said she reads cards and is also a pagen, it cant bother him that much otherwise he wouldnt be with her, thats what i think anyway, why not try a spread which involves them both

 

[Alta]

Sounds like among other things that you sorely miss your friend's company. ((((miss_yuko)))

I doubt you could pry her away from him right now, with the way you describe it. Maybe you will have to resign yourself to waiting for a bit until the heat cools off enough that she wants a bit of her own space again. Meanwhile keep the readings lighter and more general is my best advice.

 

[cheekyminx]

So why does this friend want a reading??

Early days, early days, there will come a time where she'll want her friends back lol So ya gotta wait till the honeymoon period is over.

 

[Gayla]

[Yeah...she used to be also my 'ritual' parnet, since she is the only other pagan around me i really trust and like (and ritual require one to be comfortable with the other). But since she found this guy, we are never alone. and it's not his fault: she's madly in love with him, so she wants him around all the time.

I guess sometimes i miss her friend, but i must respect what makes her happy.

They are so in love i don't think they could pick up any vibes that didn't come from themselves. My vibes were totally ignored]

(((Big hugs to you Yuko))) Now we have the truth, clarity and understanding in the matter...your friend is moving on...and yes, you will miss her...

You have a great outlook about it...totally unselfish..you clearly understand she is in love with him and you are appear to be very happy for her...but, the issue here is not really about you - her - him.

Have you ever considered sitting down and writing up your own set of ethics for your reading practices? That is a good way to set your own policy for how you conduct readings...

For example, I have mine posted on my website. http://www.freewebs.com/ambrieltarot/ethics.htm

You can share this with her know your discomfort for reading with other folks in the room does not just apply to her situation, but all your readings.

For me, if I were doing in person reading on a regular basis, I would add something to my ethics about other people being present who are not participating in the reading. I personally, would not allow it, but that is not to say it is wrong..I just wound not feel comfy with it.

 

[zach bender]

re no third person

I do not feel this is a hard and fast rule to be handed down to everyone who reads Tarot.

again, I have probably overstated the case. but I do feel that the presence of a third person inevitably, inevitably affects the interaction between the querent, the reader, and the cards. if the inevitable effect is seen as acceptable, okay, go with it. in an earlier part of this life, I was a lawyer, and I have seen what the presence of the third person does.

zb

 

[Original Destiny]

I did look in on this post the other day but due to my ignorance I had to go on the inernet to find out what a bridal shower was...So Im now fully informed......being tucked away on the edge of the wolds has its advantages and disadvantages...as with reading with a third party present...I tend to try and avoid having a third party...

I am currently struggling with a mother and daughter...the daughter wants a reading says the mother...I say ask her to phone me and I will arrange something...mother texts and says daughter is available on 2 dates at such and such times...round at mothers house...I say please ask your daughter to contact me as I am busy and it would be easier for her to fit in with my timetable...

So in this case it might be that daughter wants her mother present...Mmmm I have read for them both in the past together...but i felt uncomfortable at the time

So I guess you have to do what feels best for you. you have to concider your needs first