Do we put too much responsibility on our deck?

[Formicida]

So how do you decide if you really don't connect with a deck? How long do you give it, and how much do you put into it?

I think I'm different from a lot of people in this thread, in that if I own a deck I really want to connect with it and will eventually try to put in whatever it takes to do so. I've been hitting a brick wall with one deck lately, though. Even when I can get an intuitive message out of it, which is not always, it has nothing to do with either the traditional meaning of the card or what the deck creator says it's supposed to mean. I guess a lot of people would have given up a long time ago, but I'm stubborn and don't like the idea of not being able to get a deck to talk to me. On the other hand...well, it's still not talking to me.

How long do you give it? What do you try? How much effort is it worth putting into a deck that doesn't speak to you immediately?

 

[faunabay]

Formicida, I really don't worry about what type of meaning comes through - traditional, deck creator, etc. - as long as one comes through.

As for how long......it just depends on how long you want to give yourself. There are some people here who began reading tarot years ago when the only deck they could get was the RWS deck. Some of them say it took years to "get" how to read with them. But that was all they had so they almost had to figure it out if they truely wanted to read.

So my belief is you can read with ANY deck, stone, cloud, etc .......if you want to give the time to figure out how you hear it speak. Now I have to say I don't have that much patience alot of the time.

I believe we have gone to the other extreme now of having too many decks available to us. There are so many deck choices out there we don't give decks a chance to work with us, unless they "speak" right off the bat. We don't give ourselves the chance to learn how to use them, because there is a million other decks out there to go to if one gets to hard to learn. I think we cheat ourselves alot of the time, out of a deck that may be a bit tough to learn but would have soooo much information we could draw from if we just took the time to learn how to use it.

 

[SunChariot]

I've given it some thought and I think I tend to put too much of the responsibility on the deck for "speaking to me" instead of spending more time exercising my intuition and my connection to the Divine. I don't spend enough time on generally researching symbolism and the like, either, or acquainting myself with the information in the books that go with decks to see what the creator of the deck had in mind. Instead, I just expect the deck to carry the burden of the weight in the relationship. This led to my constant searching for "THE" deck when I first started with Tarot. It also means that when a deck comes to my door, I tend to just go through it, do a few readings (usually poorly) and then stick the deck in a drawer, saying I "don't connect with it". I think if I'd take on more of the weight of responsibility for the deal, I'd be able to read with almost any deck. (I'm nearly there, but only about halfway.)

Anyone else?

Well for me personally, I don't make much distinction between doing a reading and connecting with the Divine. To me, and I know not everyone feels that way, what I am doing when reading is asking the Divine questions and it is answering me. It is a particular form of communication with the Divine. If I want a direct answer to a question that is the method I use, if I just want help I use other methods,

To help my life along, I do a lot of angel meditations and communicate with them that way and now my newest love mantra meditations is what I use to create things in my life as I want them. I'm a little new to mantras, but they have been amazing for me already.

I don't learn symbolism, as a rule. I prefer to find my own within myself. Like A see a pattern and it reminds me of a dress I wore when I was 12 and made a speech in front of the class kind of thing...then it is about speaking out, or possible having a message that needs to be said...I prefer to find my symbolism inside myself when I can than to have someone tell me what something means.

I also usually prefer to just see what I see in the imagery and not bother much with the intended meaning of the deck's creator. I've tried both ways and I know this is what works best for me personally.

I don't believe in "The" deck. I have 56 decks now and I use them all lovingly. I use my intuition to tell me each time which deck is best for a particular reading. I have them listed on my computer. I just pull out my list, read it over and sense which one is the right deck for that reader and question. For me I don't have one deck that is better than the others, they all have their uses and purposes. Some are better for some things, some for others, and they all get used. To me, they are all equal.

I have, of course had decks I do not connect with, we all have. There were two decks, I put back in the drawer because I just could not read with them: The Thoth and the Lovers' Path. Some time later each called to me and I felt impelled to give each another try and they worked wonderfully for me then. In fact the Lovers' Path changed my life that day in a miraculous way. I found I had to change my reading style a bit for them to work and I did and they did.

I have had 4 others that never worked well for me, I traded them for other decks.

Babs

 

[Demon Goddess]

I've given it some thought and I think I tend to put too much of the responsibility on the deck for "speaking to me" instead of spending more time exercising my intuition and my connection to the Divine. I don't spend enough time on generally researching symbolism and the like, either, or acquainting myself with the information in the books that go with decks to see what the creator of the deck had in mind. Instead, I just expect the deck to carry the burden of the weight in the relationship. This led to my constant searching for "THE" deck when I first started with Tarot. It also means that when a deck comes to my door, I tend to just go through it, do a few readings (usually poorly) and then stick the deck in a drawer, saying I "don't connect with it". I think if I'd take on more of the weight of responsibility for the deal, I'd be able to read with almost any deck. (I'm nearly there, but only about halfway.)

Anyone else?

Interesting question you ask, now given the appearance of Melody in my life.

I wouldn't have thought that I put too much responsibility on my deck prior to her appearance, but now that she's expressly using my Revelations as my communication piece, I am not so sure.

I do find myself and my friends specifically asking Melody questions, so I've suddenly put a ton of responsibility onto this particular deck of cards. I doubt Melody minds, it's why she's here and she did tell me, "when in doubt, ask"... so I do.

But one of these days, I think, maybe I'll ask the wrong question and my cards will explode into the ether like a gunpowder flash.

I hope it's not possible to put too much responsibility on a deck. I really really hope not anyway.

 

[SunChariot]

Interesting question you ask, now given the appearance of Melody in my life.

I wouldn't have thought that I put too much responsibility on my deck prior to her appearance, but now that she's expressly using my Revelations as my communication piece, I am not so sure.

I do find myself and my friends specifically asking Melody questions, so I've suddenly put a ton of responsibility onto this particular deck of cards. I doubt Melody minds, it's why she's here and she did tell me, "when in doubt, ask"... so I do.

But one of these days, I think, maybe I'll ask the wrong question and my cards will explode into the ether like a gunpowder flash.

I hope it's not possible to put too much responsibility on a deck. I really really hope not anyway.

I got lost, who's Melody?

Babs

 

[Demon Goddess]

I got lost, who's Melody?

Babs

I'm going to get famous for answering that question... Melody is my Spirit Guide... She talks to me through my Revelations deck.

 

[SunChariot]

Oh how wonderful! I tried to find out the names of my guides, but they do not seem to want to tell...

Babs

 

[faunabay]

Oh how wonderful! I tried to find out the names of my guides, but they do not seem to want to tell...

Babs

One time I had a couple of guides coming through and I asked for their names. It was kind of frustrating because I could feel they were trying to tell me, but I just couldn't hear. So I asked them to flat out shout their names at me. They kind of shrugged, laughed, shouted out.....and I heard it that time. I dont' know why I could hear their information but couldn't hear their names. I believe it was a block on my part for some reason and they helped me out by shouting! LOL So maybe "listen" deeply to your inner voice to see if your guides don't want to tell you or maybe you're just not hearing - like I was.

 

[Nevada]

So how do you decide if you really don't connect with a deck? How long do you give it, and how much do you put into it?

While I think a good reader can use any deck, that doesn't mean you should stay with a deck that you're not happy with. If I find that a deck isn't satisfying for me to read with, I trade it or give it away. There's no sense in trying to work well with a deck you don't click with. I think we usually have a good idea, early on, whether we will feel good working with a deck long term.

Why stay with one you're not sure you like? When I was young I used to think that if I started reading a book, I had to finish it. You get older and realize life's too short. Move on, if it doesn't feel right to you. No one else can tell you what to look for. It's a personal choice.

But I've also learned, over time, to be more selective about what I purchase. That's gotten easier, too, with the Internet. When I started out there were only a few stores I could buy cards at, and they didn't tend to have much selection. Now I can read reviews and look at as many excerpts or scans as I can find, and sleep on the decision for many nights (honestly, sometimes for months), before plunking down hard earned money. It's not a guarantee, but it reduces the chances I'll be unhappy with a purchase, and otherwise, if I bought every deck that ever tugged at me with attractive artwork on a few cards, I'd be swimming in decks and even broker than I am. Not a very happy tarot reader either.

Be kind to yourself first. Then gain a deep understanding of the deck -- the deck you like.

If I was having trouble finding any deck I liked well enough to stick with, then I'd do an in depth review of what I didn't like and did like about the ones I knew, to kind of home in on what exactly it is I'm looking for.

Nevada

 

[Formicida]

I think Nevada really got at what I was trying to bring up with these questions in the first place:

So how do you decide if you really don't connect with a deck? How long do you give it, and how much do you put into it?

I think I'm different from a lot of people in this thread, in that if I own a deck I really want to connect with it and will eventually try to put in whatever it takes to do so. I've been hitting a brick wall with one deck lately, though. Even when I can get an intuitive message out of it, which is not always, it has nothing to do with either the traditional meaning of the card or what the deck creator says it's supposed to mean. I guess a lot of people would have given up a long time ago, but I'm stubborn and don't like the idea of not being able to get a deck to talk to me. On the other hand...well, it's still not talking to me.

How long do you give it? What do you try? How much effort is it worth putting into a deck that doesn't speak to you immediately?

As Nevada says, maybe life is too short to spend time with a deck that doesn't really work for you, especially if there are others that do. Sure, if you're jumping around from deck to deck not connecting with any of them, that would be a good time to sit down with one of them and really make the effort to connect. Conversely, if you only really connect with one deck and aren't happy with that fact, then there too you may want to really work on connecting with something else. But if you have decks that work for you, and this one doesn't...well, life is short. Why fight it?

On the other hand, I'm pretty selective about my deck purchasing and tend to believe that any deck that finds its way into my hands does so for a reason. So I have a hard time giving up on one of them.

And, as I kind of thought might happen, the deck that I was struggling with when I wrote that post suddenly opened up to me not long after I posted it. It took some persistence, but not even all that much--just more than I'm used to. So I think that confirms Grizabella's original premise: we can read with any deck, but it's our responsibility to figure out how. I'm still not sure whether or not it's always worth doing the work--it probably depends on your personal relationships with your decks. But it can be done.