Hermit as relationship potential

[Thirteen]

I always see the 4 pents, though, as someone who is protecting their own boundaries, not those of others. They are drawing a circle around themselves. Keeping private. Holding on to whatever they have for themselves.

True. But if they think that the other person is part of whatever they have, then they'll hold onto them as well.

But I didn't mean for my mention of 4/Pents to threadjack. I only mentioned it because it's one of those cards that *could* given question, querent, spread, position, indicate to me a manipulative relationship. This as compared to the Hermit, who I really don't think is interested in manipulating anyone, spiritually or otherwise. If anything the Hermit might manipulate someone in order to escape a relationship and remain on their own, but to make them think/believe like them? I can't see the Hermit getting anything out of that.

If you're Svengali, you're stuck with Trilby always asking you to help her sing. If Svengali was the Hermit, he's likely say to Trilby, "Figure out how to sing on your own. I've got better things to do with my time then hypnotize you."

 

[Thirteen]

Actually no. i think that The Hermit goes within himself to check if he wants to
further the relationship. The Hermit is for himself/herself alone. Sure there is
another party (hence the chance of a relationship) but The Hermit says first
Do I want to do this, what will happen if I do this. It's a me me me card in
relationship potential. Once the Hermit works it out within himself/herself they
move forward. No longer are The Hermit.

Agreed.

 

[GreenMoonBeam]

Agreed.

Blushes. You made my day. Thank you

 

[SunChariot]

I'm thinking there would be none??

Could be, a potential for a good relationship if the querent were also a Hermit type. To me it would mean someone who prefers to stay home evenings, who likes a lot of time to unwind, likes alone time to think things out...Not anti-social really, just likes a lot of time to think things out and unwind.

Now this would not be a match for someone who is outgoing and likes to go out partying every night. That could spell disaster right there.

BUT for someone who also prefers staying in, likes a lot fo time alone to meditate and read...and who could truly understand the partner's need for this and respectt their need for alone time and as she would want the partner to respect hers....it could be a good match.

That is how I am seeing it. A Hermit personality would probably get along best with someone of a similar personality type.

Babs

PS I just went back and read all hte other answer after. It's just fascinating how many different ways we all came up to see this. And I can see the logic in them all.

 

[SunChariot]

Or if you asked the potential of a relationship and the Hermit card came up, it might mean that that is still undecided and unsure, that the energies that would determine whether the relationship can be good or not are not quite set.

The Hermit needs time alone to think things out. He has not yet decided what to do or which way to move. He is off alone thinking it out. The card could just mean that it is too soon to know and the partner is off thinking things over and what he decides will alter the answer.

Like, for example if you were contemplating getting into a relationship with a man who has recently left a bad relatiosnhip. IF he decides that he is ready to trust women again then yuo could have a good relationship. If he decides that he is not ready to your chances of happiness go down considerably as does teh potential of your relatiosnhip.

If this man has not yet decided if he is going to trust again or not for sure, then the Hermit could come up to say that things are still being thought over and there is no decisive answer that can be given just now. Until he decides for sure, no conclusive answer can be given about the potential.

Just more thoughts...

Babs

 

[Bronwyn1]

Lots of food for thought. Thank you to everyone who replied!

 

[nisaba]

The thing that occurred to me is that it could turn out to be a Svengali-type of relationship; with the Hermit controlling or attempting to steer his (or her!) partner's spiritual or inner beliefs.... manipulates by subtly undermining them, until they finally start to believe that his way is the truth.

This is more Hierophant stuff, isn't it? Especially in his role as High Priest and even more so as Pope. The Hermit, to me, has more important things on his mind than a relationship. Perhaps his turning up in an otherwise positive relationship spread means that to keep it positive, you need to respect his space and occasional need for solutide (or time with the boys)?

 

[Haunted Wood]

Hmm, the hermit as relationship potential. Maybe it would be a relationship which is very deep and soul-searching, and allows each person to discover who they really are. Maybe a relationship where you can enjoy comfortable silences with each other? Where both people would respect each others need for time alone by themselves. I think that it would be a relationship with lots of deep and meaningful conversations with one another.

 

[magicksky]

the hermit as relationship potential

couldn't it also be one person feeling lonely, or isolated in a relationship - going within for comfort or something?

It came up in my relationship spread once when I was in a long distance relationship and feeling quite neglected at the time. It was saying to me - you may aswell be on your own because it didn't feel like there was any give and take - just long absences punctuated by arguments and tears, and the odd short lived reunion

 

[Fostha]

couldn't it also be one person feeling lonely, or isolated in a relationship - going within for comfort or something?

It came up in my relationship spread once when I was in a long distance relationship and feeling quite neglected at the time. It was saying to me - you may aswell be on your own because it didn't feel like there was any give and take - just long absences punctuated by arguments and tears, and the odd short lived reunion

Maybe,but wasn't the question "hermit as r/ship potential",which i think says none really,hermit is a time of introspection,a solitary journey that one takes in order to find the answers to all that they really want to know,total withdrawal for all the right reasons.As sunchariot says,depending on the situation,and surrounding cards in a spread there would be different ways to look at it,it's just a real period of contemplation more than anything,so maybe thats what your advice would have been there from the hermit,to just withdraw and look real close and see if that was really enough for you,some people actually like that kind of life,not my cup of tea,but it takes all~sorts to make the world go round.