...If someone is "10 of wandsing" you

[love.actually]

How about passive-aggressive behavior? Like my mom used to huff and puff and sigh about how she had to do it ALL and then decided to rearrange the livingroom on her own cause I was 5 minutes late to do the dishes. I can feel this in myself too, yes, the passive-aggressiveness is strong in me :-D
I take on extra burdens and feel sorry for myself but I am really fricking mad and hellbent on making them feel bad. What I should do is to drop that burden, wait for anyone to catch up to me and tell them that I need help.

just a different view on the card, not sure it would fit in with your reading though

The title of this thread made me laugh!
I totally agree with Jema. I used to get this card all the time for my feelings about a girl whose passive-aggressive behavior kept chipping away at our relationship...like a war of attrition.

 

[caridwen]

Also responsible. I sometimes see this card as total responsibility for something. As in this is your fault. This is entirely your responsibility.

 

[Stargirl]

Wow! Thanks everyone for your insightful looksees into this card! All of this resonates!
The passive aggressive thing didn't occur to me before, but definitely makes sense. "Unloading" on me -- yes, that is familiar indeed.

 

[Teheuti]

Actually, if someone else was doing the 10 of Wands (to me), then my first thought is that they are carrying me as a big load on their shoulders - that I represent a heavy weight that that person is carrying. It's like I must have dumped on them, and they've had to pick up the pieces.

It seems to me that the big question is whether the position meaning is supposed to be telling us about what the other person is doing, or is it telling us about me and my effect on someone else? If the latter, and the card were reversed, then, yes, I might see the other person as 'unloading' on me.

 

[Stargirl]

Thanks Teheuti. I see what you mean!
For this situation, I crafted my question as "how is he treating her?" and the answer was "10 of wands." So there was a particular "umph" going from him to her (in my intuition). I probably read that as him kind of hoisting his baggage onto her. But depending on what meaning the card has taken on for you personally, I can see it going the other way as well, for sure.

I think when we decide how we feel about a card and what it means, the card just says "okay, I am that" and shows up dutifully according to your meaning... and when you change your mind about the card, its showing up shifts with your feeling about it That's been my own experience, anyway!