Why do my family avoid me?

[MizGrace]

I have had this issue for a longtime and have asked for the 'truth' yet no response from them. I pretty much have an idea of why in my mind and I chose Morgan Greer 1979 for this bold and striking!


King of cups

I feel they expect me to find love and not turn to them. They also see me as someone who has had a few boyfriends and not concreted things. They also feel content in their lives secure in love marriage and feel this is something they care about. Therefore have no time for me as their family is more important.

10 of pentacles

I received money after my mothers passing and they all turned up when ill the final hours the rest of the time they bullied her and myself. I see this as what they did emptying drawers while I was at the hospital to check for funds. For myself this is where they are at still anger and jealousy over the money I received being more than them. Yet this money went on bills and moving home I infact saw not a penny of it. infact at the end of it they had more than me as they didnt have to pay bills and move home. so, I can not see their issue money is unimportant a human life is precious. Being the youngest they felt they were the ones to make decisions and I went above their heads to keep mother at home safe.

VI swords this is they feel dishonoured by me I am a humiliation to them. they would prefer me to go away or them to be far away from me. I feel the boat symbolising the fact they disliked mother and myself and are glad when neither of us are around. They do not wish to visit the grave or talk of her. They mention it as over it and did within days of her passing. I imagine if they got more cash they would feel differently oh she was amazing! I have been unwell and so was my mother same time as I was they blame me for being unwell myself.

knight of swords

I believe this is the ex I dated and never let them meet. They ask me about when I said I still loved him and not anyone else I have dated ( under a handful of men). They think I am potty as he has gone, forget about him and as he was as eccentric as I am they feel embarrassed by my choice in men.

High Priestess

The Bingo card as im calling it in this reading as, they have been backing off when I came here and also went to the spiritualist church. I believe also they are jealous of my education and qualifications so be it! as well as ashamed of me being into continuing tarot studies, they think its all taboo and nonsense Christians dont behave in this way as if in the old ages.



overall my thoughts are they simply dont care they feel I am the problem and want rid of me asap. I am weird I am the one they want to send off on a boat and keep telling me why dont you move from where you live hey? so I dont live so close, if I knock the door they pretend to be out. I feel they want me married off as they all are they see happiness in being married with children and being married at a young age. They state I shall never marry have children as too old. in my 30's? is that too old? 'pops clogs while typing' they will do anything to get further away from me and their family is more important to them as well as cash.

help advice welcome. Have I lost the plot in my reasoning behind the reading? perhaps I see this as all wrong yet I have never met my nephew he is 10 months old I am emailed pictures only and videos. I feel numb by it when they ring like today it was as brothers birthday Saturday. I felt like hanging up and could only muster yes/no response.
am I being unreasonable? to ask for their time when we were all so close. I am tired of trying to mend a broken family. I feel sad as rest of family met the nephew I still havent.

 

[Saskia]

King of cups - 10 of pentacles

VI swords - knight of swords

High Priestess

Hi MizGrace, sorry to hear. I'll have a try.

You have already tied the cards to past events and you know your family better than anyone, so you're probably right. But this is purely about the cards.

Why do they avoid you?

King of Cups - 10 Pents. These two look really positive cards so it's difficult to say why this is an answer to why someone avoids you. Do you have very different lifestyles? Is your family content as they are, maybe lead by a patriarch (father, grandfather, father in law?).

Or, it can mean what you said that they expect you to find the King (husband, partner) and establish your own clan/family, because "that's what adults do" or whatever reason they have.

6 Swords - Knight of Swords makes me think past arguments they want to forget. Did you use to have an argumentative relationship before? It sounds like there's been quite a bit of clashing at some stage and the family rather enjoys peace and quiet (6S) than engages in any word battles (KnS). If not arguments, how about misunderstandings? The KnS wounds others with his/her lack of tact, whether deliberate or completely accidental.

I'm also thinking, are you perhaps jumping to conclusions or harbouring past wrongs? What you wrote about the history sounds like you've been wrongly judged and you still feel resentment for that. If you resent them, you can't really build a meaningful relationship.

High Priestess is a prompt to listen to your intuition. If you feel sad about the fact you're not in contact, how could you rectify it? What's the reason you haven't seen your nephew? Have you tried to visit but wasn't let in, or what's going on? If it's about lack of invite, don't wait for it but offer to go. Parents of newborns are exhausted and can't think about hosting anyone. Also, you said they ring you but you can't muster energy to talk - isn't it you, then, who's avoiding the family and not the other way around?

If you're not sad about not being in contact, use the HP to find a balanced, calm life on your own. Family is what's given to us, not chosen by us, and it's a hit and miss. If they don't add anything positive to your life, find your own inner peace (HP).

 

[Free Flight]

I have had this issue for a longtime and have asked for the 'truth' yet no response from them. I pretty much have an idea of why in my mind and I chose Morgan Greer 1979 for this bold and striking!


King of cups

I feel they expect me to find love and not turn to them. They also see me as someone who has had a few boyfriends and not concreted things. They also feel content in their lives secure in love marriage and feel this is something they care about. Therefore have no time for me as their family is more important.

10 of pentacles

I received money after my mothers passing and they all turned up when ill the final hours the rest of the time they bullied her and myself. I see this as what they did emptying drawers while I was at the hospital to check for funds. For myself this is where they are at still anger and jealousy over the money I received being more than them. Yet this money went on bills and moving home I infact saw not a penny of it. infact at the end of it they had more than me as they didnt have to pay bills and move home. so, I can not see their issue money is unimportant a human life is precious. Being the youngest they felt they were the ones to make decisions and I went above their heads to keep mother at home safe.

VI swords this is they feel dishonoured by me I am a humiliation to them. they would prefer me to go away or them to be far away from me. I feel the boat symbolising the fact they disliked mother and myself and are glad when neither of us are around. They do not wish to visit the grave or talk of her. They mention it as over it and did within days of her passing. I imagine if they got more cash they would feel differently oh she was amazing! I have been unwell and so was my mother same time as I was they blame me for being unwell myself.

knight of swords

I believe this is the ex I dated and never let them meet. They ask me about when I said I still loved him and not anyone else I have dated ( under a handful of men). They think I am potty as he has gone, forget about him and as he was as eccentric as I am they feel embarrassed by my choice in men.

High Priestess

The Bingo card as im calling it in this reading as, they have been backing off when I came here and also went to the spiritualist church. I believe also they are jealous of my education and qualifications so be it! as well as ashamed of me being into continuing tarot studies, they think its all taboo and nonsense Christians dont behave in this way as if in the old ages.



overall my thoughts are they simply dont care they feel I am the problem and want rid of me asap. I am weird I am the one they want to send off on a boat and keep telling me why dont you move from where you live hey? so I dont live so close, if I knock the door they pretend to be out. I feel they want me married off as they all are they see happiness in being married with children and being married at a young age. They state I shall never marry have children as too old. in my 30's? is that too old? 'pops clogs while typing' they will do anything to get further away from me and their family is more important to them as well as cash.

help advice welcome. Have I lost the plot in my reasoning behind the reading? perhaps I see this as all wrong yet I have never met my nephew he is 10 months old I am emailed pictures only and videos. I feel numb by it when they ring like today it was as brothers birthday Saturday. I felt like hanging up and could only muster yes/no response.
am I being unreasonable? to ask for their time when we were all so close. I am tired of trying to mend a broken family. I feel sad as rest of family met the nephew I still havent.

I get the sense there is a lot of pain in the past and that some people prefer to shut down and not face it and become surface dwellers. You represent that past and consequently if you are brought back into the fold, it will re open an old wound. You are deep and thoughtful and some prefer not to associate with depth.

Definitely the inheritance plays a part in this. There some jealousy there and when coupled with the pain of the past plus maybe the different lifestyle you mention (High priestess/spirituality) well its not that you aren't worth it,it is that they are unreasonable and thinking only of themselves.

It certainty sounds like a very hurtful situation but I would advise you tp create your own family via current and future friends and loved ones. Stop seeking the approval of those that don't seem to care. Family can take many forms - it doesnt have to be blood.

You are taking this very personally (knight swords) and need to step out of it with the emotion attached removed (which we would all have) and pretend you are more of an HP. Act as if you were giving advice to a stranger in this same situation which would remove the pain and emotion and allow you to thrive without them.

 

[Sulis]

Moderator note - Feedback

Hi MizGrace,

Could you please leave some feedback for each person who has replied here?

No more replies please until MizGrace has caught up with her feedback.

Sulis - moderator

 

[MizGrace]

I had emergencies to attend to and couldnt be here at all.I was talking to police due to neighbor issues and I had my time filled up with that. I am also not on Australian time and so its difficult to be here. When I have been home I havent had any time to log in sorry.

 

[MizGrace]

Why do they avoid you?

King of Cups - 10 Pents. yes they are content as they are and expect me to marry like them.

e.

6 Swords - Knight of Swords they like peace and quiet yes. harboring past wrongs yes I am but cant say on here. I have had a lot done to me by this family. Things that are far beyond trust that no family should do to someone.

High Priestess .

I can not answer questions further on private life as questions are too personal.since its the internet not face to face its better for me not to type more on it.
all I can say is I can put hand on heart and know I have done nothing wrong.

some issues are from simply just being in this forum and myself holding a interest in Tarot and Oracles divination, it intrigues me. That simply isn't their way of life and it is something they 'fear' and see as 'strange' 'weird' non Christian thing to do. Other problems stem from being closer to one parent when born and sibling being jealous to this wanting attention suddenly. Yet never wanted attention before and making sure now the parent is deceased that I know about this. Family members now side with this family member as the feel the same way, that the attention from the parent was focused on me and not them. My being born has caused a rift in the family that they feel can not be repaired. They have then gone further with jealousy to speak their anger at me write it in letters. as well as verbal abuse. I have also had to deal with it going as far as, involvement in my relationships and their laughter when it has ended and they have won. I would not trust my family to know anyone I know or, anyone I would see as a suitor, it wouldnt end well and I cant really say anymore.For its just too personal and raw.

Thank you for the readings its clarified a lot for me--- things cant be healed ever and, my focus is on me moving forwards to start a life with friends, they are my past and not my future, family wont be blood and it wont matter because, I can leave family to their vicious games to play with one another if I take me out of the equation completely I know they wont care at all, yet if I dont call them and try to make them care, I can walk forwards and as painful as it is to accept they simply dont care. I cant live a life of abusive taunts it is soul destroying, I am not strong enough to be a victim to cruel words and actions as, an adult it's about making choices that are for your own health and well being.