confused about the lovers

[ROmina]

i still don't know what to believe about the lovers card... is it a card about love, commitment, partnership or about choices???

i only have 1 year of practice but in my experience it's about choices. am i right or maybe i'm not experienced enough????

 

[werewolfmoon]

The Lovers, for me, means decisions of some sort, in all the time Ive been practising it has never indicated a lover reading the cards is largely intuition, no matter what deck you use, your first thought is normally right.

 

[nisaba]

i still don't know what to believe about the lovers card... is it a card about love, commitment, partnership or about choices???

It's about both.

It's not really about day-to-day choices - your Seven Cups comes in a bit there <grin>. It's more about those moments where you know you're teetering on the edge. You can go forward and change everything - or you can pull back and stay where you are.

Change is not necessarily a universally good thing - think carefully about this choice.

And humans being humans, those breathless moments often involve sex. Will I move in for a kiss, or will I shake hands goodbye? Will I keep their phone number, or will I throw it away?

 

[RaaD]

Choices, Love ..... these are very simple explanations about that card

Before the card was named " Lovers ", it was called " The Choice ". The card represents how we are finding our other self and reaching peace with it. As you look at the card in RW the 2 figures are somehow not entirely looking toward eachother and by that every one of them is projecting a reflection of their biggest desire to the other. By experience in futher relationship they are discovering the true self of themselves. And then the choice is made, make or break. As for the spiritual reading the card asks you to find a peace with your soul and to be ready to meet your true passion with open heart and love ( this is not neccessary a sexual relationship ). For career the card warns you that a big decision has to be made and you should consider all options available but at the end do what your heart and soul are telling you. In relationship reading the card marks a start of a big love if single or bringing the first side love to more strong one. However this does not necessary means that the tail will end with happy end. If the case is as the one described above ( you had projected your vision upon your partner or vise versa ) as soon as the influence of the card drops off or get weakened, self reception will be awakened and you or your partner will be in understanding that this relationship is not what they thought was in the beginning.

 

[AJ]

I've always felt the card was misnamed, and should have been Love. A world of difference, Lovers is incredibly restrictive.

 

[canid]

Yes, it's about choices. Think of the Biblical Eve's choice...was it good or bad? (If you believe it, but the analogy is still there.) The Lovers is also often about union. Could be physical between 2 people, could be uniting your physical self with your spiritual self, or even refer to a coworker. Sometimes it unites the cards surrounding it, harmoniously or not is up to you to interpret. You're right, it is confusing but all the cards have many many levels, both good & bad. I like Peter Gabriel's song lyrics in The Blood of Eden...

ETA: I didn't mean to leave out the 'love' aspect of the card, just that others already mentioned it.

 

[Thirteen]

The Universe's Choice for You vs. Your Choice in One

i still don't know what to believe about the lovers card... is it a card about love, commitment, partnership or about choices???

Many readers think the cards tell you what is going to happen to you as if you were a character in a book. "You will meet a tall dark stranger and marry him and have three kids..." says the tarot reader. As if you're a puppet of the universe rather than a part of it that can act and do. The thing to understand, however, is that while Tarot does tell you about things that are "fated" to come your way—like that tall, dark stranger—you still have free will. And the reason you get told this is to be able to make an informed decision, not to just go along with it.

This is very much the case with the Lovers card. Early decks had cupid shooting his arrow into a fellow and the girl that arrow made him fall for. The card was originally called: "The Lover"—and what "choice" meant was "Cupid's choice" for this man. So it wasn't about some choice coming up that you'll have to make like picking a red shirt or a blue shirt. Rather, it's a warning that you're going to encounter something you'll have no choice but to want/love. As if cupid has shot an arrow into you, you're going to feel helpless about your feelings for it; it will be like you've found a missing part of yourself, and you're going to want it.

BUT...you don't have to follow your feelings. Will you commit to it, partner yourself to it, show it your love? That's up to you. The cards can tell you when and where Cupid's arrow will strike you, but they can't tell you what you'll do about it. You're not on a roller coaster going where the cards take you, you're on a drive with the cards as a map. They can point out a detour ahead that was made for you and that you will want to take...but they can't make you take it. That is your "choice."

Does that help?

 

[LeFou]

I've always felt the card was misnamed, and should have been Love. A world of difference, Lovers is incredibly restrictive.

I agree. Apparently, the Greeks associated the number six with Aphrodite (Venus), so abstractly, six would be beauty, desire, attraction, harmony. Lovers seems to say (to me), "Desire drives the Universe."

 

[PAMUYA]

i still don't know what to believe about the lovers card... is it a card about love, commitment, partnership or about choices???

i only have 1 year of practice but in my experience it's about choices. am i right or maybe i'm not experienced enough????

Is not love, commitment,and partnerships all about choices? Many run into love based on emotion, but anyone in a lasting relationship will tell you it is so much more than that, it is give and take, your choice in a partner is one of the most important choice you will ever make. This card is about choice, dont let the of this card fool you. People can be lovers, but not be in love.

 

[Teheuti]

Some of the oldest decks portray a marriage, which is what Etteilla called the card. Cupid's arrow, as an inescapable force that strikes you unexpectedly, is part of the Marseille tradition, as is Hercules having to choose between Vice and Virtue. Waite stresses the choice made by Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, in which the Tree of Knowledge refers, in part, to the biblical saying for sexual congress: he 'knew' ____ (the word in Hebrew is Da'at). Jungians see it as the dynamic balance of the inner masculine and feminine. I could go on and on, but one of my favorite meanings is based on the Golden Dawn correspondence to Gemini, a sign of communication, showing how we need to 'nakedly' communicate what we want and need in relationships (without subterfuge).