Why would you want to know if some one is gay?

[psychic sue]

Everyone - the reason I asked the question in the first place, was to make people think WHY they would want to know someone else's sexuality. IMHO it is no-one else's business who I (or anyone else) sleep with.

I have never in 25 years of reading NEEDED to know someone's sexuality. I suppose I was genuinely curious as to why the question might come up.

Personally, it makes no difference to me.

Sue x

 

[MeeWah]

Based on the previous similar questions regarding the subject, it appears the intent of most, if not all such queries stem from *a sincere desire to be of appropriate assistance to a client/querent, to be knowledgeable towards that purpose & not from a necessarily prurient interest*.

Granted, some may be motivated by purely curiosity or even nosiness, but the majority apparently genuinely want to be informed as readers in order to better serve their clientele.

It needs to be noted that some viewers do find the question offensive as it can represent as the intrusive or the private information not for public dissemination.

Gender does not define an individual, nor does sexual orientation, racial background or spirituality.

As nigh any subject can be sensitive or controversial, the approach & handling would be of concern & interest.

Please keep in mind the ultimate purpose of a discussion serves to educate & inform on a general level. What anyone chooses to do with their cards, however, is an individual matter.

~MeeWah
Senior Moderator

 

[Ace]

I thought of something last night that I want to add here. I remember I did a couple of parties where the kids (one group was 13, the other seniors in High School) asked if I could tell if they were gay.

I found the 13 yr olds very disturbing to work with. I didn't want to look because if I saw it I would tell them truly and maybe upset them. (they had been put up to this by an older boy with doubts about his own sexuallity-the cards said he was straight, BTW) Actually, I think they were not gay anyway.

The older ones, I asked them, do you really want to know? if so, why? what if I saw you were? Finally, we just discussed it, and I told them that probably if they were, they already knew, and if they had to ask they probably weren't and I didn't have to read it.

I can see that as being a motivator for asking this question, how can I tell if "I" am gay. But otherwise, I agree with others: if you are looking for someone else's sexual orientation, unless they asked you to, back off!
Ace

 

[Knight of Wands]

My opinion on this is that its ok if you are not meaning it maliciously, also what you did find out should be in confidence.

Also if people didnt treat gay people as 'weird' then it there would be no reason to get embarased! Like straight people don't get embarased by saying their straight. Also if soceity stopped assuming, and treating children that they are straight, then if a child was gay, then their would be no shame in coming out.

Know this isn't really that relavent, but i've been struck by how much people say they might not want people to know etc....

 

[Oni]

Ok just my 2 cents.

like i posted before about a bad reading i had that had to do with sexuality, the reader was convinced i was a sex slave and a drug dealer and all kinds of crap, all of wich was not true. she outright claimed the cards tould her that, now if someone says cards tell them that then i guess someone could say cards tell them someone is gay! he hee. like if u r a good reader u should be able to get that from the reading without have to do some kind of thing different than what u would do with anyone else. i get sexual vibes from people of all sorts when i do readings. like i do need to no anything about them and i think if a reader wants to know someones sexulaity they just want to cheat and make the reading easyer. he hee.

if the reader is good they do not need to know.

 

[Sophie]

The reader doesn't need to know anything and her ethics shouldn't allow her to pry.

It's querents who sometimes want to know.

 

[arachnophobia]

ugh. I am tired of this question. lol! Ok, agree or not, I don't think that USUALLY it's some ulterior motive reason or evil plan to blackmail. lol! Just plain and simple wanting to know, perhaps because they themselves are gay and want to know about someone they like at a distance. Simple. You can argue it to the ground, that it doesnt matter, blah blah blah. All the common sense stuff applies. But, boiled down to pure simplicity, it's probably just that they like someone and want to know what their chances are. May not be the right way to do it, but oh well.

No, I don't think you need necessarily have ulterior motives to want to ask this question. The querent coming to you might represent a young teenager, very confused about their own sexuality, and they might want some help working this out... ;-))

 

[Alta]

Please see this thread, which is a listing of all the threads on the topic before posting.

http://www.tarotforum.net/showthread.php?t=43063

Thanks,

 

[gregory]

I just saw this thread. I don’t read. I have gay, lesbian, straight and bi friends….

I am baffled by this whole thing. IF someone is gay - or straight or whatever, and the reader needs to know that to interpret the cards, the cards will indicate whatever is necessary for the reader to know. If nothing suggests sexuality, it will be because it’s irrelevant. If it needs to show up in some way, the cards will offer a question to ask which will not cause a problem. And whatever, the reading may not make sense to the reader, perhaps, but the client will know what it means – whether they choose to hear it is another matter.

And a major caution about all this relationship stuff. There was a story in a magazine I read recently about two married women who lived on the same street. Both are straight; both loved their husbands, and had kids. They fell in love (coup de poudre stuff) and moved in together. They make love. BUT - when interviewed both agreed that it had been about the PERSON they had fallen for, that they were not gay, and both felt that if they ever took up with someone else, that person would be a guy. You cannot box in sexuality. Even if you did ask, you can’t be sure to get an answer that is relevant. (Marion – sorry if this IS on another thread, but I just hadn’t time to look and thought it worth saying !)

 

[Isispriest]

Gee, Let's not get defensive.

I think my perspective is in line with Scorpion's

Definitely not a problem to me on a personal level. However, a lot of readings concern love or relationships and it gets tiresome to talk of "they" when you're not sure of a client's sexuality

Being gay, bi, transgendered, whatever is not about being "other" or "otherwise" or "having a problem".

As a pro reader it may be my problem to discern my clients sexual oriention, just to look good. My expectation for myself as a fab reader is to be able to tell them not only that there is a new romance on their horizon, but what that person is like in personality, appearance, and at least gender.

Sometimes the cards will tell you:
A gal that had been in some of my classes was living with her female partner for a few years while I knew her. Several years after we had lost contact I did a reading for her at a psychic fair. The reading was shouting "new love relationship" And a couple indicators, a King and the Emperor as an influence coming in suggested a man. I tried to talk around these indicators with "a masculine person", etc. Until the client simply told me, "It is a man that I am in love with this time".

Or the 50 something gent whose reading has 6 out of 10 cards Majors. Moon, World, Justice, Judgement. I'm talking to him about significant decisions, reflecting on his past, emotional sensitivity, health concerns. I got close enough for him to talk about how he was looking into getting a sex change.

Or the reading I had where the reader tried to tell me that I was gay. I felt she was so missing me that I turned off to the entire reading. And 20 yrs later I can confirm that yes she was wrong.

As a reader it is the similar problem to the young woman with a large belly and average shape otherwise. Is she pregnant? Do I just ask? Or risk being wrong and blowing the reading. Well if I get the Empress and an Ace or 2 I may have to risk talking about her impending motherhood. If she is sure she is not pregnant I can appologize and not take her cash!

The multi-gender, sexual orientation issue may or may not be a concern for the querant. But it is a minor concern for me 'cause I would rather not ask, I would rather "look good" and be able to intuit where my client is at.

Many people go to me who do not want to talk much about themselves. They want me to tell them everything. For these clients I do not give them a, "this is a process that will work best with a mutual open flow of energy and communication blah,blah ". I respect their perspective and do my best without their input.

But that's just me.